Sometimes Bitching Works
Thanks so much for the kind words of encouragement yesterday. Writing it out does help, sometimes both mentally and physically.
My BAN weight this morning was 142.8. Apparently the mental baggage I unloaded yesterday had some real "weight" to it. I haven't been at this low of a weight in a couple of weeks, and it's weird how much I can tell the difference. I also think some of it has to do with the fact that my thoughts on the food have come around a bit too. For awhile there I kept just thinking "screw it, one meal out isn't going to hurt... one slice of cake... one pint of ice cream...." All that adds up and all of a sudden you are eating crap most of the time and not really caring, and it takes some effort to get out of that. At the same time, I am adjusting to eating less (about 300-400 calories less) than I was when I was working out like a mad woman, and that was interesting, because I like almonds on my salads, and a big breakfast, and while I was having a hard time eating enough when my calorie goal was 1600, I had a tough time getting it down to 1200 or so as well. I think I have it down now, and that is making things easier too.
Im still not working out. I feel like I have to jump start it to get back into it. Lighter, less impact workouts are totally undesirable to me right now... but I want to get the motivation to do them. Part of me still just wants to stay off my foot totally until it is better so I don't have to deal with this crap anymore and just do what I want. Hopefully this weekend I will get my but in gear and do something though...hopefully.
So that's where I'm at today. Much more optimistic about whats going on in the food and weight department, still hurting and sulking about my injury. But I've got half the battle down, so that is a good start!
