Hey everyone I hope you're all doing better then I am. I've been so busy, helping plan this shower that I'm going to have a break down! I spent 2 hours this morning looking for the tube part of my chocolate fountain only to find it stuck to the back side of the styrophome! I could have thrown it out the window..but I already bought the chocolate for it. Ya 40$ worth of Lindt dark and milk chocolate...and I can't have any!!! Oh well the guest will enjoy it. So we were shopping for decorations yesterday (step-sisters and I) and we were so hungry! So we went to boston pizza. I actually did good...I had lime shrimp at 210 calories and a salad with raspberry dressing for 130 calories. That would have put me under by about 500 calories and I know going under is just as bad as going over so I had a big mug of beer It was really good and it put me to my minimum calories that I needed for the day.

So I probably wont be posting till sunday...tomorow is the shower in the afternoon then in the evening were going on a pub crawl for the stagette. I haven't drank alcohol in forever...(not counting that beer at bp's) So hopefully I wont spend too much money. Oh and my mom is comming on the pub crawl and bringing one of her friends!! My mom is 49(almost 50) and her friend is I believe 35...so for all you people that say you're too old to do something...take the advice from my mom..."Growing old is manditory...growing up it optional" She still has fun and goes ski-dooing every winter. Anywhoo I need to get a ton of stuff ready to take over and I still have to pack and go shopping for more stuff. It sucks that I'm spending my money on stuff that I can't even have...oh well. Have a wonderfull weekend ladies!

Hey everyone, just a quick post. I'm getting packed to go to my step-dads cabin. I'm going with my mom and my whole step-family so it should be fun. It sure beats staying at home alone...my BF is gone to his families cabin for his yearly "guys only" weekend. It's nice that this year I actually have something to do. The only thing I'm worried about is leaving my cats alone. I know it's only 3 nights but I've never left them alone before. I left out a ton of food and water so I know they'll be ok but I cant help but worry...they're my babies:) Anywhoo I should get a move on...have a good weekend ladies and watch out for "bad" long-weekend food! Oh and stay safe too!

So I just finished watching a movie called "Queen Sized" staring Nikki Blonsky. It's a "based on a true story" movie about a bigger girl getting nominated as homecoming queen as a joke and everything that happenes with that. It's an amazing movie that I really could relate to. I cried buckets! Trust me if you haven't seen this movie...go out and rent/buy it. I can't begin to tell you how amazing and insperational it was to me.

I didn't exercise today again...boooo! My calfs still hurt from Monday when I went wading in the river. My legs have never hurt this bad before. Like even just walking around the house is painfull. So I went out and bought some Rub A535 and rubbed it on my calfs and wrapped them in plastic wrap. I read somewhere that if you wrap whatever body part with plastic wrap after you put the A535 on it works better....don't know if that's true but anywhoo. Guess what?? My legs still hurt, no change, at all. I might get my boyfriend to massage them when he gets home cause I really miss exercising.

Well thats about all, talk to you ladies later...stay strong and positive:)

Hey everyone:) So I found out that when you have hyperacidity you have to follow a specific diet. Well trust me that it's going to help with my weight loss. This is what I have to follow in order to be healthy.

-no coffee/alcohol -no high fat foods -eat smaller meals more often -avoid eating 2h before bed -no pop(any kind) -no chocolate or peppermint -no spicy foods(i don't like this one) -no acidic foods orange or tomato(ok if it's fresh) -no gassy foods like onions, cabbage, cauliflower, brocoli, spinach, brussel sprouts -I have to be carefull with milk because of the latic acid - no fried foods -no pickels -avoid unripe fruits -I have to eat more slowly -lots of water -I have to eat regular meals and on time

So I'm sure this is going to help with the weight loss cause I have to be carefull what I eat or I'll get sick. Oh and the nexium that the doctor gave me is working out really well. The naucea is gone and the pain isn't as bad. I still have to go for the camera down the throat thing. Just in case I have an ulcer. Since I've been having these symptoms off and on for 11 years the acid may have done some damage so I might have to have sergery(sp??) after all. But in the mean time I'm feeling a ton better. And it's so weird..I got a call the other day from the assistant director of the daycare I was working at when I got sick. They want me to come back in october for a few months to cover a leave-of absence....that may turn into a permenant position. This is awesome cause I wanted to go back when I felt better and my unemployment runs out at the end of september...what a weird coincidence!! I have to let them know by sept. 5th but I'm pretty sure I'm going to say yes. I just want to wait and see how the new diet changes affect me. I had my last taste of fast food last night and ya I dont' feel all that great today...but I think that once I stick to the "bland diet for hyperacidity" I'll start to feel loads better.

So yesterday my step-sisters, my boyfriend, and I decided to go to a place just outside of the city called cranberry flats. We parked and then we had a nice long walk down to the river. It's not too wide at that point and you're not supposed to actually swim cause of the strong undertow in the middle. So we just went out till the water was just above my knees. Boy is the current strong. We would float down the river for a little ways...just untill the water got shallow..then we would walk against the current and do it again. Boy what a work out!! Then when we were about to go...see the bank of the river is basicly mud....dry mud and really wet, slimy mud. So I looked at my one step-sister and said "we should have a mud fight!" and she agreed...but my other step-sister and my boyfriend weren't so happy about it. So her and I grabbed a handfull of mud, looked at each other, and threw it at the same time. So for about 10min we all had a huge mud fight!! It was so fun! We were covered in mud. We took pictures...I'll post them on my blog as soon as my sister gets them on facebook. Then there was the walk..which was uphill this this time. Another good workout. So today my calfs hurt soooo bad! Anyhoo it was so fun playing in the mud:) I deffinatly have to do that again!

So talk to you all later:)

Hey ladies just thought I should update you all on the health thing. Well I went into my doctor yesterday to get the ultrasound results. Well there's no problem there!! It's good and it's bad at the same time. It's bad cause I really thought it was my gall bladder so I was looking forward to him telling me that and then continuing from there. But it's good cause it's means no sugery. So now were going to be looking for what's wrong again since I'm still nauceous and I'm still in pain. My doctor said that it's likely that I have a hyperacidic stomach. So he started me on a medicin called Nexium and I get to have a camera shoved down my throat. All I can say is I hope they put me to sleep first! Well anyway I should get going my boyfriend and I are babysitting his neice and nephue. Have a good weekend ladies and talk to you all later!

Hey everyone I finally have some good news for a changs!! So I called unemployment cause my online profile still said that they needed more info. Even though I brought my new medical form into the office two weeks ago. So i was on hold for a long time while the guy checked out my info. He was so nice. I though I would have to wait for at least another 2-3 weeks till I got my deposits started again. But this amazing guy just said that they received the medical form and he went and talked to his supervisor...when he came back he told me that he had the authority to extend my medical unemployment and that he would help me complete the report that got messed up a couple of weeks back. So we did the report and he told me that I would have my money within 4 buisness days!! This is amazing news cause my student loans are coming out of my account in about a week. Also I'm doing my sisters bridal shower and the people who were suposed to bring wine(my future bro-in-law's sisters) decided that they don't think they should be the ones to provide everyone with alcohol. They said that the bridal party is supposed to. Well lets look at the bridal party. Theres me on unemployment, my 19 year old step sister who is going to school and working part time, and my 18 step sister who is going into college in about a week. So ya now we have to get the wine too. Well thankfully my boyfriends dad makes the best wine you could ever drink...and I really mean that...he's amazing at it! So I'm going to call him and ask if I could buy some for cheep. Hopefully he will.

So anyways my weight loss has stalled but it's ok cause I lost inches so I know that I'm still getting smaller even though the scale didn't move. Also I looked back on what I have been eating and found places I could improve. And the exercise kinda stalled for a bit. But I cant blame myself cause when I'm in so much pain I have to lay in bed for two days I shouldn't get upset with myself for not exercising. I'm doing what my body allows me to do and that's all I can ask of myself.

So thats about all. I just want to thank all my friends who have been leaving words of encourgment and amazing advice for me since I first started blogging. You guys...your support means so very much to me...and I couldn't have done it without all of you Thanks so much! Hey you know what would be cool to do in a couple of years?? Have an extrapounds.com reunion!!! Somewhere in the states cause that's where most people seem to live. LOL or we could all take an all inclusive vacation to a resort in Mexico....girls only! That would be a blast!! Anywhoo talk to you all later...stay strong and positive!

Hey everyone I'm still here. My computer isn't on very often lately cause we upgraded the video card...then we needed to upgrade the power supply...now we need another fan cause it heats up and then shuts it's self down. But if we leave the side off of the tower it doesn't heat up that much.

So I've been pretty sick lately. I know you're all probably sick of me saying this but I can tell I'm getting worse. The pain in my side is all the time now...I'm getting used to it but sometimes it starts to hurt really bad. I almost made my boyfriend bring me to the hospital the other day cause I was hurting too bad. But the pain went away after a while so we didn't go. Today was my ultrasound...finally!! I had it early this morning and boy did it hurt!! She's like "hold your breath" then she pushes that ultrasound thing into the spots that hurt most. Ya that was fun! Anywhoo I've had this ultrasound many times before but like I said they never found anything. Well she took a lot longer then usual to take the pics of the spot that hurts. Usually they take pics of each spot. Well where it hurts she took four pics of each spot so I'm hopefull that she found something and the doctor can fix it. Then I can beg for my old job back!! When I lost my job...my boss said that when they figure out whats wrong with me they might hire me back, if they have an opening. Cause she said my work was terrific and I work so well with the kids but they need consistency. Which I totaly understand. They didn't want to let me go but it was a good decision in the end. This way I can take care of what's wrong with me and make myself healthy again.

Needless to say I haven't been exercising too much lately. Most of the time I'm laying in bed. It's so cute my main coon cat...main coon is the breed...they're the biggest breed of cat. Anyway he's been really cuddly with me lately and not just that he's been really careful when he jumps up on me. Like he only will go on my left side. It's weird but it's comforting. Like today I just got up from a rest and he stayed with me the whole time. He laid on my arm and let me cuddle with him. This is something that barely ever happens. I noticed that since I got sick he's been more cuddly...like he knows that I'm sick and wants to make me feel better.

Well on to my main point...fear of success. I've noticed this happening before. I get a small amount of success..the 14lbs I lost. And then it's like I sabotoge myself...and I don't even know I'm doing it. I want success but sometimes the unknown is scarry. Like for me...95% of my friends are guys so in my head I'm thinking are they going to treat me different after I loose weight? I thnk thats something that I didn't even realize I was worried about till recently. I have to think long and hard about why I get scared when I see success. I'm proud of myself but theres something else there. I know I'm gong to succeed cause I want it more then anything else in the world. Does this make sence to anyone?? I've done this to myself before so now that I know what I'm doing I can prevent it. Anyhoo sorry for all the spelling mistakes..lol. I'll talk to you all later!!

Well I'm getting back on track. I've been pretty sick lately so I haven't wanted to exercise. I've had my normal pain and naucea, my ibs has been acting up, and I have terrible cramps cause I've had my TOM for almost three weeks. It sucks big time. And I lost my little book that I've been using as my food diary/calorie counter. Hey did I mention that the water is shut off in my building till 5pm?? And that my boyfriend forgot to fill up the water cooler before he left for work?? AHHHHH!!!! I need my water I usually drink about 3L a day. How can I work out with no water?? Well I could always drain the tank. I'm supposed to go over to visit with my sister...she's going back home today but I need a shower and....ya...no water!! I'll probably just wait to exercise till tonight and then I'll be able to shower afterwards.

So I came to the end of my sickness benifits on Aug.2. They sent me the new doctors form July 30. The day before the long weekend! Like I could get a doctors appointment on the long weekend. Also once it gets into the saskatoon office it has to go to the regina office for processing....which takes up to 21 days. Now why didn't they send this form to me at the beginning of July so that there's no big space between my payments and I'm not waiting for money again? Because they like to make things complicated!! Hopefully it wont take 2 months again. Well I'm in pain again so I'm heading for the advil. Talk to you all later!!

Well I realized that my goal to fit on the one ride was a bit unreasonable. When I went on it last I was about 260lbs. To get on that ride I would have had to loose 35lbs in one month. That's really improbable(I don't say impossible cause of the show "The Biggest Looser") but really unreasonable for me. Anyway I got on the ride and the guy tried to push the bar closed...and no deal. He tried again but it didn't work. So I started to walk off and my little sister asked the guy if she could get out too. He was really rude about it. He gave her a weird look and said "NO!" in a really rude voice. So when he turned his back she said "well f**k you!!" and gave him the finger...LOL! All the people on her side of the ride started clapping! So I felt bad cause it was embaressing but at least I had some support. And I didn't really want my sister to get off the ride cause I wanted her to enjow it even if I couldn't. But just knowing that she would have means a lot to me. Anyway I went on a lot of other rides and I did have a lot of fun. I didn't get home till 1am! That's why I didn't send anyone messages last night like I said I would...I'm sorry..we got there at about 3:30pm and we didn't get to the car untill about 12am. I had a sore throat, slight fever, and I was shivering. I think I had mild heat exhastion. So when we finally got home(stupid traffic) it was 1am.

So while I stood at the exit of the ride I was upset cause this was a goal..even though it wasn't reasonable...it still was a goal. So I was disapointed in myself. But after a few seconds I started planning the exercise I would do to make my results even better. Like my little sister said..."just use this as modivation for next year". And I am cause this time next year I'll be in Toronto still for my friends wedding, and were planning to go to Canada's wonderland. I think that's even better then just our citys exhibition.

So anyway I'm still not feeling 100% so I'm taking the day off from exercise. Plus my knees hurt from all that walking on the pavement. So everyone I'll talk to you later..stay strong and positive ladies!!

Hey everyone...so the exhibition is tomorow!! I'm pretty nervous so I decided to blog...it usually helps. My head is full of "what ifs?"...What if I can't fit on the ride/I fit but the ride guy has to push it closed/I can't pull myself into the seat? Just all these weird things...cause i'll be thinking about the last few weeks and wondering if I could have done better. So I'm going to try not to worry and if something happenes I'll have my sisters, my boyfriend, and my friends to support me. If I couldn't go on the ride I'm sure they would leave with me..they're just like that.

So today is the first day that I've been able to exercise since before I went on my holidays to Edmonton. The two days after we got back I spent about 85% of my time in bed cause I really felt bad. It's starting to get bad again...really sucks. I only have 10 days till the ultrasound so I'm hoping they find out whats wrong so they can fix it.

Well thats all I can think of for now. I'll blog on sunday so you know how the Exhibition went. Stay strong and positive ladies!!