Blah

So, it has been about 3 weeks since I last wrote. Things have been going fine. Not as smooth as I would like but good enough. I am down 6 1/2 pounds.  I have started taking new meds for blood pressure and antidepressants. Hopefully these will get me to feeling better so than I can become a normal part of society once again. My biggest concern right now is having my stepdaughter move in with us in about 3 more weeks. Who knows what that will bring. She is coming to us from Kentucky where she has lived in a not so friendly environment and is fed up. She wants a new start and my husband (her father) and I are ready to give that to her. In fact we have been ready and now so is she. My kids are 6 and 8, so I am hesitant only because I don't know what life with a teenager will bring. So we will just have to wait and see and take it as it comes.

Tuesday

Just another day. Went to bed last night with a painful ear infection. Now, I feel like my ear is going to explode. Of course I can't go to the doctor because I have no medical insurance and can't afford to pay for the doctor. Go figure. I will just try to get through this and search for some leftover antibiotics at my house tonight. Hope this doesn't affect my eating habits today. Oh well, we will see.

Monday

So, I seemed to have done well for the first couple of days when it was new, and I made the time to focus; then the weekend came and I threw caution to the wind and just ate mindlessly. Now its Monday I am feeling guilty once again and know I want this thing badly. My goal is to lose 75 pounds by September 1st. Maybe if I set out smaller goals it will help me stay focused so that it does not seem so overwhelming. At that rate I would need to lose 19 pounds a month. Which stlil seems a little overwhelming because that averages out to 4.75 pounds a week. That's a little tough to swallow. But I am going to try my damndest to get it done. I'm not getting any younger.

Fresh Start

It has been a wonderful day for me. I got to work and had roses and a card with $100 dollar bill in it for Administrative Professionals Day from my boss. This is the first time I have ever been recognized for this day. (I was with a different employer this time last year). My boss and his wife are the most caring considerate people to work for and I am grateful for them. Then he told me to look into getting a health insurance (which was not something that was part of the deal when I was hired on). So, I made the call to an agency that is a friend of his and they gave me the big blow. That I was too heavy to get a policy. That no insurance will write one for me because of my weight. So now my mission is to lose 66 pounds. The big number is 226!. If there is anyone out there that has a kind word or would help motivate, I would greatly appreciate it. I want this sooooo bad. But it just seems so difficult alot of the time. I know I have to put my mind to it in order to succeed. But I could use some encouragement through this struggle. Thanks!

Another day has passed.....

I haven't been on here in quite a while. I can't believe how the time has passed. I thought that time had come to a standstill.... but the world continued on as if nothing had happened. And now it is coming up on a year since the day..... The day I lost my daddy.     :(   I miss him dearly.

DADDY

My Dearest Daddy "I love you",  I think of you each day. I feel your arms around me, that's how I get through my days. Your looking down upon me, to guide me on my way, but its very hard without you, each and every day. People always tell me, the grieving will subside. But how can it get better, without you by my side. No matter how hard they try, to help me with this pain, I am all consumed by thinking, it will never be the same. I know one day we'll meet, in the Heavens up above. Its the one thing that helps me, to never forget your love. My Dearest Daddy "I love you", Your with me every day. I will keep this love within me, until that beautiful day....

Day 10

Just checking in. So today is day 10 of this new lifestyle for my family. Kinda went over calories a little yesterday. I just found myself to be starving all day.  But I am not discouraged. After looking back at what we used to consume I am not troubled by going over 150 calories. All I need to do is focus on the end results and don't let this little setback deter me from getting there.  If you fall down on the ground you just gotta pick yourself back up, dust your butt off and climb back on. So today is better. Not nearly as hungry as yesterday. Still on plan with my calories. And I have already burned off 857 calories for the day. I have actually burned more than I have consumed so far. I will finish the day off with a nice healthy meal for dinner. And then start back over again in the morning. I am starting to find that exercising is a little more of a struggle for me. I knew that moment would come. I was waiting. But I just have to force myself to do it. I usually find that whatever my excuse was in my head that shouldn't exercise is always better when I am done. Whether it be I am too sore from previous workouts, or I am cramping due to mother nature, or I am just too tired.... I find that after the workout my soreness has worked itself out, my cramps are gone, and I am full of energy....... I see the results so far, even if not physically in my appearance, but by the way I feel.  This is motivation enough for me to continue. I also see a difference in my kids. If that doesn't do it, I don't know what else will. They inspire me..... So until next time. Good luck to all.

"You've got to say, I think that if I keep working at this and want it badly enough I can have it. It's called perseverance." -- Lee Iaccoca

Weigh-In Day

Stepped on the scale this morning and was down 13.4 pounds in 1 week!!!!! Totally did not expect to see such a drastic loss. I am even more motivated to continue this thing. Hubby is down 9.2 pounds too. I am loving this. This diet and exercise thing really works. :) So here's to another successful week of making the right choices.

Once more

So, we fell off the diet thing. But as of last Monday it has begun once more. This time I am not going alone. Mike is doing this with me. We have started out with a 2000 calorie diet to start and exercise 2x a day every day. I actually didn't work out today. I figure 6 days out of 7 is not bad....... So I guess I have finally figured out what my previous diets were lacking. Aside from the fact that this isn't really a diet but more a change of lifestyle for us, we have incorporated a workout routine. I never did that before. Just tried to do the diet. Didn't have the want to or desire or even the energy to do the workout. But I actually look forward to doing it now after only 1 week of it. It is working. I cheated and weighed myself early even though the official weigh-in isn't until tomorrow. The scale shows a 10 pound loss so far. (And thats with mother nature visiting) I am psyched. It seems so easy this time. I am just waiting for it to get harder. I know it will. And I am greatful that I have my loving husband by my side to support me with this.

Day 3 (New Challenge)

Mike and I started a challenge today. He thinks that I don't have the willpower to do this diet. He thinks because I thought the food tonight was nasty and I barely choked it down that I don't have the motivation anymore. So I challenged him that he couldn't do it. So we came to an agreement that we are going to compete for the next month starting with weigh-in in the morning since we both just ate. Whoever loses the most by May 13 wins. The race is on!!!!

I have to say that I don't really care who wins. I think it will be ecstatic and more motivational for him to do it with me. I want him to lose more than me. Then he will be motivated to stick this through to the end and we can live healthier lives for us and our kids.

The stakes are:

Him:  a new chrome gas cap ($100)  for his truck (whatever.... it's a guy thing i guess)

Me: a $100 shopping spree for new clothes

........ I can't wait to go shopping........... :)

Day 2

Sick this morning, so I didn't eat breakfast at scheduled time nor did i eat as much as I was supposed to. They say at Nutrisystem you have to eat all of the food or it won't work right. Kinda strange to me. I am not used to eating everything (even when I am so full I feel like I am going to explode) and still lose weight. Anyway, same for lunch, was out only had a lunch bar, not full meal. Made up for it at dinner though. Had a yummy fulling dinner, pizza, wheat thins, carrots, handful of almonds, and a salad. Plus had a NS Chocolate Crunch bar for dessert (not bad).

I know I shouldn't weigh myself daily but it is an addiction. Have lost four pounds since yesterday. We will see how long that lasts.