This. Is. It.

This is it. I have to do something about this weight. I can't live like this anymore. I just can't. I hate myself. Let me rephrase that. I hate what I have done to myself. I hate that I have allowed myself to treat my body this way. That I have let things get to this point. That I have allowed it to get to the point that I don't have the energy to play with my son for any length of time. That I have allowed my weight to become a "third person" in my marriage. That I have allowed it to change my personality. I am a very outgoing and personable person..but the weight has make me self conscious and therefore slightly introverted. Something that I am definitely not. I am so angry with myself...and maybe that's a good thing. Maybe that's what I need to finally kick my butt into gear and do something about it. It's not gonna be easy. It's gonna totally be worth it, but it's not gonna be easy. In fact, it's gonna be incredibly challenging. But I am going to remind myself every step of the way that I am doing this for me. And I deserve it. I deserve it...