one month down, two to go....
with may behind me i statrt june w/ so many hopes.
the first being.....................
one month down and 2 to go and i hope the insurance will then approve me.
i went to my ob/gyn and have decided to gather up my records and go to a new dr. i was treated very poorly. he didn't have my needs before his which was the best way to get the most money from me and my insurance. he also talked to me about my decision to try and get approved for gastric bypass. he was against it. he told me is i was unhappy w/ my body there were other options "such as" going to his other office where he is the only doc. and i could let him basicly do some lipo like procedure that was approved to be done in the office. i was soooo mad!! what was i hearing??? first, i was there to address the results of my pelvic ultra sound. i questioned that and his reply was "thats not here or there, its been 6months now" and second, my decisoion was not about how i looked but how i feel on the inside and i didn't just decide this over night....i took 2 and a half years to research and tried to change my life myself.
the whole experience was bad. i feel more depressed about my situation and no further than i was a week ago. i know i need to go and "get my clock reset' as i keep being told but i feel so... i can't explain it. like i just don't want to deal w/ it. of course i am b/c i have to but i still don't want to deal w/ it. my appt. at the new doctor ( a woman and highly recommended but a drive which i don't about any more as long as she knows what shes doing or if she doesn't she'll help me find someone who does) is june 26th. i know its a way off and i didn't explain anything i guess i just didn't want to talk about it any more. maybe monday i'll call back and let them know why i'm coming (more than a check-up) and see where we go from there.
well i guess i'm gonna go. i'm starting to feel depressed i guess and i don't like it. tomorrow i need to go to weight watcher and weigh in, maybe the meeting topic will be up lifting. good night every one.