Going Forward

I had a good week last week 3.5 lbs off but the scales aren't showing much movement this week - I'm due on next week and I always slow up the week before. Reading that sounds like I have normal regular cycles doesn't it? Actually I know I'm due on next week because last week I got the sharp, painful stitch in my side that sometimes occurs 2 weeks before my period starts. I have never ever been regular, my average cycle time is currently 42 days but it varies significantly within that. It's always been the same ever since I was teenager and I've got used to it. About 2 years ago I went over 90 days without a period so i went to the doctor (I wasn't pregnant I did a test) and was finally sent for an ultrascan to test for Polycycstic Ovaries - the results were "consistent"with PCO's. It explained alot to me - why I had always had difficulty losing weight, why my periods were so erratic and even why I regulalrly got the excrutiating mid cycle pain at ovulation time. Following this diet has evidenced that I lose weight at approximately 2/3 the speed of the "average" woman. Whereas most of my fellow dieters lose a stone a month I'm losing a stone every 6 weeks. But at least I'm losing which keeps me going.

I don't know why I'm going into this now - well I guess I do actually - I've just recieved a letter from my doctors surgery, a new doctor has just joined and she specialises in women's problems and she has requested I go into to speak to her. That's an interesting turn up because no doctor has ever shown the slightest interest in my problems before. Even when I was diagnosed I was told there was nothing they could do and I would just have to learn to live with it - which I have done for the last 30 year. Added to that is that I have found a diet that works and I've been monitoring the impact of my weight loss on my cycle length - it's a bit early to say but there is a trend towards a shorter cycle length. That last few periods have been all around 35 - 38 days apart. I wonder if this means I'm more fertile? I came off the pill 4 years ago, without much hope I have to admit, and I've been proven right. Not sure that I want to be fertile now I'm approaching 40 rapidly and my husband is 50 this year - think I'm past the having kids stage . Actually I've never had a strong desire for kids - I know some people might think that's strange - When I got married I though it might be nice if it happened but now I rather think it's too late - not physically but mentally, I don't think I'd adapt very well. Does that make me selfish or sensible?

Oooh I've been a bit deep tonight haven't I?