09/09/2008 08:41
You have got to be kidding me (pulling hair out)!
You have got to be kidding me (pulling hair out). I went to write my blog, finished it and previewed it and splat - I lost it. I lost my mind b/c before I do that I usually copy and paste to ensure safe passage.
Anyways, I will just cut it short - drats! I'm now 179.5. Yay - clapping! I should have been there sooner - according to my chart, but I'm there. I know 180 is just around the corner but now that the 180's have released my scale from being a hostage, I'm not letting them get it again - lol! I don't know how I will act when I get to 169. I think it's the same feeling of when you finish reading a book or beat a video game (i luv video games), then it's on to the next one. Either way, I'm ready to be 160-that would give me a good excuse to go shopping!!! Can't wait!
08/11/2008 10:41
HI MONDAY! I'M HERE - TA DAAAAA!
185.5 - Ok, no gain, but no major loss. I’m so skeptical of my scale at home though. I want to go down to the clinic in our building, but I don’t feel like it. I get on the scale at home and sometimes come back to it in a couple of minutes and it is 2lbs loss or something. Anywho, going full throttle this week. I don’t care about no cramps – it’s show time. I know I said I’m looking for 179 (my mini goal), but I want to see 181. 181 has stuck w/ me a long time. I remember getting on the scale 181, months later 181. Or not see it at all. Somehow 181 and 160 stand out to me b/c I weighed those for the longest.
This past weekend was fun – not really. My nephew spent the weekend w/ me and my daughter. He is 5 and will be 6 this Thursday. I know I was enthusiastic about the Wizard of Oz when I first saw it as a child – I saw it really early b/c my mom is into children’s classics and such. But my nephew wasn’t really exposed to it like we were when we were growing up. So one day while I was out of town – I talked to him over the phone and told him that it was on. Ever since then he could not stop talking about it. So when he visited, he wasn’t satisfied w/ what was on TV. Well we went into my DVD and VHS selection, (yes, I still have videos) and I said that I may have the Wizard of Oz. I thought it was damaged though. Well we found it and why did I do that? We popped it in and it showed great. I have one of those VHS/DVD combos. He was ecstatic. I was too but I didn’t want to watch it 4 times over the course of 2 days!!!!! I watch a little of the old Batmans (Returns and Forever) and Big Fat Liar and some Barney!!! I packed those VHS and sent them with him – fast!!!!
He said all of the others played when he got home except for the Wizard of Oz – awww! So I will have to purchase the DVD for him.
Well I got some 30 minutes in last week and over the weekend except for Wednesday and Sunday, but I have my bags packed (good sign) with workout clothes for after work and will walk. I’m excited. I’m planning on doing more than 2 miles. My stress level seems to be up a bit and my immune system seems to be weak, so I know walking is a good dose of medicine for me. Having relationship problems, but I have been there before. I will survive!!
Good thing I don’t like dating ice cream. I usually put my frustration into cleaning things. My life has to change for the better – I want to lose weight so bad. My bday will be here in no time- Nov. 4, (election day-why?) And I plan on celebrating it. I haven’t celebrated my bday in years and I want to. I will feel so good if I look good. I love looking good. Makes me feel good inside and out.
I think I mentioned that I don’t like going out w/ the girls or being around people that I’m not usually around b/c of my weight. A former coworker (who I got along w/ good) recently resigned from a former job and I was invited to come to the going away party. I know others wanted to see me, but I just couldn’t do it. My old boss (who works there) lost half of her body weight. She had to be 300lbs and is now like 150 or less and she lost it w/o any operations (over some years) and others in my former unit look like sticks too and I look bigger than I was when I left (about 4 years ago). I just want to show up looking like I want to look. Some people probably don’t care, but I do.
This morning when I got up and off to work, I felt like I should have called in. I’m glad I didn’t. I feel so much better. I think it has a little to do with my willingness (and with medication of course). I didn’t sleep much last night (stress and pain combo). Seemed like nothing worked until I finally took a sleeping pill. I still felt bad this morning, and when I got to work, but I feel good right now!
Hi Monday – I’m here –ta daaaaaaa!!!!
08/08/2008 14:45
APB - All Points Bulletin (179)
Calling all cars! Calling all cars! We are looking for 179. The name is 1-7-9. 179 is critical to our operation. He has other buddies 169 and 159, but until we catch him, the rest can’t be found. He’s slick and he will show up and disappear. We had him once, but that was a long time ago. He’s been in hiding a long time and if we don’t catch him soon, it will be much harder later on down the line. He definitely doesn’t hang out at a lot of fast food restaurants, check Subway though. Keep a close eye on the tracks, running paths, and anything that has to do with exercising and fruits and veggies – he likes to hang out in those places. He is about 5’5 and is currently using the alias 186. He has many friends, so be careful. Once caught, we should be able to hunt down 169 and 159. Be careful though - 179 is a slick dude!
179 (lbs) IS MY MINI GOAL!
HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!
08/04/2008 16:54
DETERMINED!!!! - 3 months and 26 lbs to go.
Back from my trip from Charlotte, NC. I had fun! Reminded me of when I went into military training and I had to travel away from home by myself or going to college for the first time. I loved it. No work, no family. But I started missing everyone a couple of days into it. It was nice only having to worry about myself for a change. The city was pretty, the weather wasn’t as bad as Florida. No mishaps – plane ride was smooth. I was nervous b/c I thought the process before getting on the plane was going to be long and tedious. But I took heed to the horror stories I have heard and read up on things before I went and it turned out splendid! I dreaded coming back to work though. I didn’t get into work mode until I got back to work this morning. I was kind of hesitant to open my door b/c we usually pull pranks on each other when we are out. You may come back to your office and find a special guest there. Could be one of our skeletons we use for Halloween or some of the fake bugs –yuck!! But no pranks on me, maybe one on the whole office – the big boss, next to the bigger boss has relocated his office to our suite. It’s that time of the year and we are use to transition, but never like this. He told us to treat him like an equal. Yeah right, you have been the big man for 4 years over me, my supervisor and director and I can now treat you like an equal – no way – not going to happen. He will be treated like a big boss – end of story.
Well, I’m going to go back out to the track to walk. I actually went to another track (less populated) about two weeks ago and went running. Yes, I said running. I must have lost my mind. I think if my BF wasn’t there then I would have did more – he was so distracting. That’s why I try to leave him when I walk. Any who, I ran and walked, ran and walked, ran and walked, and walked and walked. My legs were worked. I think if I run more, well I know if I do my body will get use to it the more I do it. But I think I will stick to the walking for now. My time will be here before I know it.
Run (a couple of miles w/o stopping), learn to play the piano, and learn to swim. Those are some goals I want to reach sometime soon – well and get to my goal weight too of course.
I worked out while out of town too. I have a series of exercises I do on my own – kind of a mimic to the circuit training workout DVD I do sometimes. I threw my old fashion pushups and sit-ups in there too. They did me justice back in the day so I’m going back to them. I do it for 30 minutes and I’m good. Huffing and puffing like I’ve been running a marathon, but I’m good. Sometimes I would do it both morning and evening. I wouldn’t dare do it while home. I think the 45 minute commute I have to and from work takes something from me whereas I only had to walk three blocks to get to the convention center. I was good most of the time. But when I was bad…..I was BAAAAAAAAADDDD! I lost my mind when I ate seafood and the dessert tray was irresistible. I didn’t do that bad, but for me trying to eat healthy I know I did.
I just chalked it up as a wonderful eating experience, b/c I don’t have them often. So I treated myself. I have been monitoring my weight. I think the last weigh in I may have been back down to 187 and this morning I saw 186. Ok, so I haven’t gained any, but this train isn’t going anywhere fast buddy. I know it takes time, but I also know I need to step it up. Soooooo….
It’s time to kick it up a notch! I really want to be like Emeril when I see my body in the mirror – BAM! I’m serious! That’s what I want. I want to look good in what I wear. I want to wear my tank tops and sleeveless shirts comfortably – wear shorts again instead of capris all of the time. Wear skirts comfortably. I guess I have to go back and find that moment when I really wanted it. Focus on that and get motivated. No one else can lose this weight for me – it’s on me – LITERALLY!
I’m going to drink some water right now. I know that I can do better and I will! Are you with me????
See, this is why I don’t post often– I have written a page before I knew it, but I had to catch u guys up, so I have an excuse this time -lol. Take care everyone and thanks for checking in with me!
07/16/2008 12:03
I worked out again yesterday (yay)!
I did the circuit training dvd that I did on Saturday. When I got home, I sensed that I would not be walking (as I did on Monday) so I popped in the DVD (which is now kept by the dvd player-thumbs up) and I did my thing. I worked out for 30 minutes. I admit I did not hang in until the last set which would have been another 15 minutes. It has 5 sections:
1- Warmup
2- Beginner’s -1st Gear
3- Intermediate -2nd Gear
4- Advanced-3rd Gear
5- Cool Down
I did the first 3 and called it a day. Man, I was sweating up something. I don’t sweat like that when I walk. It has various exercises ( jogging, cross skiing motions, arm presses, ab crunches, lounges, power squats etc.) It’s more of a bootcamp style and I don’t mind since I have been to boot camp before (Army National Guard - over 10 years ago – lol).
Well, I had to wash a load of clothes when I got home yesterday and then go somewhere so I thought I wouldn’t make it if I continued through the advanced and the cool down-my excuse (and I was tired-lol). But I did the whole dvd on Saturday. I will TRY do it again tonight, b/c I know I want be walking due to church meeting. That’s the plan.
It wasn’t that bad this time. Although I think I did better Saturday b/c I worked out in the morning after I woke up as opposed to working out right after work. I was thinking about getting up early in the morning and working out, but I do not like waking up early in the morning – yuck! I may give it a try one day though.
I was trying to be so prepared w/ my meals this week, but when I went to fix my oatmeal for breakfast, I didn’t have anymore –dangit! I thought I had some left. So I didn’t eat breakfast and just drank some juice and that is a big no no b/c I will be starving for lunch.
I have the family reunion coming up this weekend. I tried to get out of it-lol, b/c I knew we would be eating buffet (country style) food on Friday and BBQ on Saturday. I will try to brace myself – may the force be w/ me!
07/15/2008 10:47
Looking forward to 5pm already.
I went walking yesterday. Did my usual 2 miles. It was warm and there was a little breeze thanks to the rain we have been having. I think I will walk again today (if it doesn't rain) and do the circuit training dvd tomorrow since I don't usually walk on Wednesdays. I hope I don't gain anymore weight. I don't want to go backwards.
My direct supervisor is out of the office this week, so I am it. I get a little nervous when he's out, but I usually do fine.
I'm looking forward to 5pm already though.
07/14/2008 09:39
Still Hanging In There!
I hope that everyone had a great weekend!
I did weigh in on Friday. I gained 2 pounds. Not happy about that at all, although I’m not really surprised. I didn’t stick to my walking as planned. I did pull out the Sgt. Harvey DVD on Saturday morning and did that (still have rainy weather here). Man that was a work out! It was circuit training. I liked it though. It kicked my butt, but I think I will take on the challenge. I don’t know what I’m going to do though. I’m thinking; just when I don’t go walking do the DVD or maybe just alternate days. I’m leaning towards the alternating days. I really feel it in my arms more than anything, and I don’t want to tear them up, but I know how it feels when you haven’t worked out in a while and you start – PAINFUL! But I also know that it gets better as you go. I’m going walking today – DO OR DIE (I hope it doesn’t rain)!
Another weekend - I didn’t do that bad, but I know that I could do better. I brought my lunch and breakfast to work for the week so I feel confident in that. Having the food at home and getting it here to work is a different story so I’m proud of myself for lugging it all here at the beginning of the week. I think that’s a game plan. BTW, wheat bread isn’t bad. I was raised on white bread all of my life so going wheat was different for me. I read up on it and learned how to look for whole wheat in the ingredients and to make sure it’s what I wanted. I still have white bread at home, but I think I will just buy the wheat bread only the next time and see what happens.
If I go back into the 190’s – I will be highly upset. I have to kick it up a notch! It’s up to me!
Happy Monday!
07/09/2008 09:46
Getting Back on Track
Oh well-TOM is here and in full effect and I can’t do anything about it.
On top of that, I wet my hair this morning in the shower and no blow dryer to dry it. I think I turned into a demon when this happened. 
Anyways, I put my hair in a ponytail and put a hair clamp on it. I don’t like wearing a ponytail b/c my hair isn’t that long and my face is really fat, especially my cheeks – thanks mom and grandma for the cheeks! 
And having my hair in a ponytail just accentuates my cheeks. But you know what – I have on my yellow today and I feel good 
– until the next cramp that is!
I did go walking yesterday (Hurray! Hurray!).
I had to – knowing I hadn’t been walking since last Thursday and knowing TOM was about to stop by. But remember, I did do the Gazelle on Sunday though-how could you forget that.
My mom called me yesterday like, “I thought you were coming over to get on the Gazelle.” I was like, “I didn’t say that. I said maybe tomorrow” (Wed.) –lol! But now I know I’m not getting on it today.
I was back in my zone yesterday. The sun was killing me though. I should have waited to go walking, but I got off early yesterday and ended up w/ some free time after my errand and if I would have just sat around, I probably would not have gone. It was more people than I expected when I went and man were they focused. So I got myself right on out there on the track and did my thing. I wanted to do 3 or 4 miles. I was thinking about it, but I couldn’t push myself to do it. I decided that I will push harder to even walk the 2 miles I do and to make sure I do it at least 5 days out of the week. Also, I will start 3 (or 4) miles in August. Probably just 3 miles so that I don’t push myself from walking all together. Gotta get that dvd out like I keep talking about so that I can do something at home too-I keep forgetting about it. We’ve been having raining season for the past couple of weeks here – gotta love that Florida weather! So sometimes I just have to get out there and pray it doesn’t rain on me or just stay home and avoid the risk.
I just feel so much better when I do exercise.
My body feels better and my mind feels better and I need that – trust me!
Why does it always feel like I have a million things to do? I think I will do some massive cleaning this weekend – like throw some things away. I hope so; I have become the pack rat I dreaded to be. I wondered why my mom kept all of that stuff and now when I look back at those things, it brings back so many wonderful memories and I thank her for that. I have some storage space in the house so I can pack things away in there. Just gotta dig in and do it. And the list goes on…clean car, donate some stuff, do some work at the church, get my daughter ready for school for next month. I’m the kind of person – I just have to start doing something – once I start then I’m good. Just starting is the problem.
I have to get this eating thing down though. I am ok for breakfast and lunch and let’s thank God that I do eat breakfast b/c I didn’t use to. As for dinner, the last couple of days it seems like the weekend. It’s like my body has slipped back into that state of it’s time to eat and let’s just eat something while we can before it gets too late – like the food in the fridge is going to disappear or something. I figure it was b/c I wanted something fast to eat.
BTW, my sis. called me over the weekend and said that she had a pecan pie over to the house. I told her I'm not even coming over there and I didn't. I would have devoured that pie in one bite. Pecan pie is one of my weaknesses (w/ a topping of cool whip). I'm kind of proud of myself that I didn't go over there.
I just know within my heart if I keep my eating healthy and exercise regularly – the extra pounds will leave. My ultimate goal is to make it a lifestyle.
Still working on that-wish me luck and thanks for the support!!!!
Down a notch. (posted at 1:46pm)
Maybe she didn’t mean anything by it, but today me and some coworkers were looking in a catalog together. It was one that had t-shirts w/ sayings and other little funny cute type items in it. Anyways, as we were browsing, we ran across a blouse. It was a peasant type - flare shirt w/ long sleeves. I wouldn’t really wear it, but she said Oh you would look good in that shirt and another co-worker agreed. Maybe it was b/c it looked (a little) fashionable and they wouldn’t dare wear something fashionable. But that wasn’t the impression I got from it. I just nodded and went looking on. I’m so insecure about my body. Maybe she didn’t mean anything by it though.
07/07/2008 10:12
New Week - New Me!
Getting off on the good foot. Just seeing what this week may bring. I never know - isn't that crazy! I can plan all I want, but it is going to do what it do (life). I guess it wouldn't be that "fun" if we knew what was going to happen. When I know the ending of a movie, it's not as good as when I'm kept in suspense. Gonna try to drink more water and stick to my guns with eating. I do pretty good through the week if I say so myself. I did have a coke on Saturday. Well not even a whole can and probably not a half, but I don't drink them like I use to (1 or 2 a day). I try to take a water bottle with me everywhere. Over the weekend is my thing. It's like my mind and body go into relaxation mode. I think I have a trick up my sleeve though.
I didn't go walking again yesterday either, but my mom has a Gazelle (exer. equip.) and I got on that for about 30 mins. I didn't feel comfortable - it was out of my league vs. the track I usually walk on. I was like - nobody ain't getting no workout from this junk. The clock is showing 30 mins but the miles aren't even showing that I did a mile. The calories are saying about 67 burned - or that's the last I saw. Uuuugh- this is not worth it. But as soon as I stepped myself off, my legs felt like jello. They were squabbling and wabbling all over the place. I guess that workout worked huh. I didn't want to do anything immediately after. I had out done myself. I will never underestimate the power of another piece of exercise equipment in my life -lol!
Note: Oatmeal is really filling and I didn't even butter and sugar it up -that much as I usually do. It wasn't that good b/c I didn't doctor it up. But I ate it and went on to church. I was solid and wasn't even hungry when I got out of the meeting just after noon. I need to do that more often. I brought some grapenut cereal too. I heard fiber is really filling and good for your body. Anyways, I thought I remember liking it as a child. Well I have it now and didn't really care for it. I think I need to buy some fruit to add to it. We will see. It wasn't that bad, but not that good either. I just can't see myself eating something I don't like - I just can't do it.
Well, my family reunion is on the 18th. It will be here where I am, so really no biggie. I wish it was out of town like last year. It was just in Alabama, but we don't get out much so that would have been fun. I love road trips. But I'm taking a trip (for work) to Charlotte, NC on the 25th for a week. So that's exciting since I've never been there before. I hope it goes well.
Happy Monday everyone!
07/06/2008 15:28
Not Too Bad
I made it through the weekend. Monday morning will be here before I know it and it's back to work again. I weighed in on Friday morning and I blamed my weight on the scale not waking up yet, but I knew that wouldn't fly. It read 185. I guess that's ok - I thought to myself - 2.5 pounds lost. I better take it one day at a time. I know that I won't be exercising all day and eating like a bird for the rest of my life (well I don't now) and I realize that I want to make this a lifestyle, healthy eating and (some form of) exercising. I really think that I can do this. I am glad I found this website. I read different peoples blogs and everyone is so unique, but we all are going through some of the same things. Everyone's journey inspires me.
My eating did kind of get out of wack this weekend, and I haven't gone walking since Thursday evening - I have to get out and go walking soon. I also have to master eating healty during the weekends. They will be my downfall. Hope everyone is doing well!
Almost forget, today I heard the words - be positive! I know that I need to be. Just by being positive, it seems like your day moves into that direction. I will definately try it more often. I know, I know - easier said than done. I will try it though!
