thoughts
So does anyone else feel like there is this voice in their head that randomly likes to say, "you won't ever look like that". You know at times when that tiny blonde just walks by. *sigh*.
Maybe yeah...it is a small self esteem issue. I wont lie. It is hard to envision me...thin..or even that close to it. granted i did great and dropped 50 and looked awesome..but i didnt stay that way..and i didnt go lower.
I did...ok..yesterday. i could have done better though. i tried to eat a lil before i left work so i didnt pig out when i got to my moms...but i still did a lil bit. mainly a carb pig out..like bread with peanut butter... if i really wanted some i could of had a little until my tummy felt not hungry.
then i ate late as well, with robert.
Once the schedule change hits next week, im going to cook before we even leave for work and take it with. we dont go to work til 3 so its totally doable. then when i get home i can always have a small snack since i doubt ill be going right to bed. That and working out...is a MUST...i have to...and there is nothing else to it.
I don't feel like being sad about this or apathetic and just agreeing with that voice. i know i can do it...its just a long road.
as one of my fave songs says
"I finally found what im lookin for, though the road's still long and the lights still far"
as with everything in my life, its sorta at that point. well my marriage isnt. We are happy with each other, but as far as building a life together, we still got a ways. we both want to go back to school which will take a couple years at the very least. slowly our apartment is looking like our own place. we are saving up for a car for him as well.
I havent done super today, but its still only 11 am, not even...i can still make something of today...get in a good workout...do something with my husband...
I CAN DO THIS...AND I WILL.
I saw something great on rasberrycordials page. every time she posts she puts that she is going to be a slim fit bride, or something to that affect.
positive thinking is a great tool and i think i need to use it a bit more...so here is my affirmations for the day.
-I am the beautiful wife, of a wonderful loving man who thinks I'm the sexiest thing since sliced bread.
-Soon enough, i will be phsyically fit and healthy.
-I am going to be an aunt for the 5th time next month! (adding in my newly acquired ones as well since i got married)
I hope the rest of you have a wonderful day, and make something out of it...dont waste it cuz ..well u never know. remember the things that are wonderful in you life right now
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