Ok... so I haven't been on here for a month. Trust me when I say, I haven't given up- it has just been one hell of a month.

I had surgery the first part of July to help with some female "issues". The recovery was a little more difficult than I thought it would be- but I felt pretty good after about a week. Well, 1 week and 2 days after  my surgery, I celebrated my birthday. Hubby got me a chocolate cake, chocolate peanut-butter ice cream, and pizza. I decided one day out of the year to splurge wouldn't kill me. Well...

2 am the morning after the splurge... I got up with terrible chest pain and I thought it was heart burn. I got out of bed and sat in my chair for a couple hours. The pain got worse and worse- spreading to my back. At this point, I am thinking "oh my gosh- I just turned 33 and I'm having a heart attack!". I woke my husband up at 6 and sent him to the store to get me some mylanta for my "heartburn". I almost passed out from the pain while he was gone and I was crying and barely able to speak when he got home. The mylanta barely took the edge off. Needless to say, I ended up in the emergency room.

2 doses of morphine,(which we discovered I am allergic to- yeah!) later, I was feeling better- but not great. They did a CT scan and x-rays. Finally, at 10pm we found out that I was having a major gallbladder attack. My doc said that because I didn't have a fever and hadn't vomited, he felt I could just see my normal doc the next day to set up surgery. So- long story short- about 2 weeks ago they ripped the sucker out. My surgeon said that there was evidence that I had had several attacks in the past (this explains a lot for me) and he found several peanut m&m sized stones in my gallbladder after he removed it. Eek!

I have to admit, I was a little surprised at the muscle pain. I had laparoscopy so I didn't really think it would hurt that much. My actual incisions don't even hurt- it's just the muscle pain where my gallbladder used to be. The first couple days were rough cause they fill you with this gas during the surgery and it doesn't all get out right away- causes some serious chest/shoulder pain.

Needless to say, I haven't been watching my diet or exercising for the past month. Thankfully, I haven't had much of an appetite either- so I've managed to lose some weight (a little over 13 pounds total lost since I started this in June).  I saw my surgeon this past week and he said I can start light activity now. I think I will try my elliptical next week- but the bowflex is a no-no for at least a month.

If my body is done falling apart, I might actually get my act together this month :-)

TTFN!

Well, yesterday was my surgery and I think it went well. I was a little disappointed when my docor said I can't workout for at least 2 weeks (I can't even pick up more than 5 pounds). Bleh.... so- now I am trying to figure out how many calories to reduce to in order to make up for the lack of exercise.

 

For the last few days I have been running around like crazy. Our landlord was showing our house to someone so I was in a frenzy trying to get the place cleaned up. (We're moving to another house next month). So Wednesday night she showed the house and Thursday morning I was in surgery. Needless to say- I haven't had much time to come on here and read your blogs or even add to my own. I am hoping this weekend I will feel up to spending some time on here to catch up on everyone's news. Until then, I am going to go take a much needed nap.

 

I hope all is well with everyone!

TTFN!

Had a fantastic weekend with the hubby. For the 4th we did home-made veggie burgers. They actually turned out really good. My hubby loved them. For the burger, bun, and a slice of fat free cheese, the calories were only 320 calories! Anyone interested in the recipe can find it here: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/food-network-kitchens/veggie-burgers-recipe/index.html

 

Today DH and I worked out together. It was nice to feel like we were finally working toward a healthy life together. In the past, one of us has always fought the other and we have never been able to be a team. I think we are finally on track now :-)

 

I am a little worried about this week because I have my little surgery on Thursday. I'm wondering how it's going to effect my weight (can't workout for awhile afterwards). I know, I know- that shouldn't be a concern- but it is. I don't know why I am so worried- I will probably spend the whole time vomiting and lose 20 pounds! lol...

 

Hope everyone had a great weekend!

TTFN!

Today's weight: 244.7... lost 1.3 pounds. Considering I thought I had gained weight, I'll take this as a good thing. I admit to being a little frustrated because I have been journaling and counting all my calories for 2 weeks- and never once have I gone over. But- I will just keep trudging along.... Gotta remember that it's not just about the weight- it's about an all-over healthier way of life.

So for this week, my planned workout program changes. I now have 30 minutes of stretching, 45 minutes of elliptical with increased resistance, the Bowflex program with increased resistance, and 30 minutes of Yoga. I'll do this for the next 2 weeks until it's time to bump it up a bit more.

My calories are dropping a bit this week also. I am now down to 1425 calories and 47 grams of fat a day.

This 4th of July weekend, hubby and I are trying something new. We are going to make home-made garden burgers instead of the traditional fat and calorie infused burgers. I got the recipe off of food network again. The burgers are made with veggies, lentils, and barley. I'll blog how it turns out tomorrow. I'm pretty excited about trying something new.

I hope everyone is enjoying their weekend!

TTFN!

So I haven't had caffeine for 2 weeks now... DH and I go out to do our weekly shopping last night (saved $21 in coupons- yeah!) and I was so thirsty when we got home that I downed 2 diet cokes. This was around 8pm. Guess what time my eyes finally shut! That's right- 3am... Hubby woke me up at 7 to say goodbye. I'm surprised I am still awake.

It's funny where your mind goes at 3 in the morning on a caffeine high.  For some reason I started thinking about old friends and now-enemies. It seems that lately I have accumulated a lot of people in my life who have hurt me or pissed me off. It's been really upsetting that I haven't been able to progress away from the hurt. I think about some of these people daily and I still get pretty worked up over things.

So, laying in my bed at 3am, staring at the ceiling fan spinning round and round, I came upon this revelation:

I have to be able to admit that these people hurt me before I can move on from the hurt.

Let me explain... How often in life does someone hurt you and, because you don't want to admit that you were hurt, you just brush it off and tell everyone, including yourself, that they don't matter and that you don't care. The problem is- we're human- we do care. The "sticks and stones" adage isn't true at all- words do hurt. Saying the hurt doesn't exist doesn't make it go away.

So- in order for me to stop thinking about these people... I need to be able to 1. Admit that what they said/did had an effect on me and 2. Realize that saying that doesn't make me weak and certainly doesn't mean that they defeated me and, finally, 3. I need to forgive them and move on. After all, how can you ever move on from something you tell yourself doesn't matter when it so clearly did?

Ok... enough of my sleep deprived thoughts :-)

I didn't work out yesterday due to the fact that I had a doctor's appointment for most of the morning and then I was busy the rest of the day. So, tonight hubby and I will be working out together. He is going to help me figure out my new weight limits on the bowflex this weekend since I haven't been feeling very challenged on it the last few times I've used it.

On a more negative note- I think I might have gained a little. This is frustrating because I have been sticking to my calories religiously. I believe I know what the problem is though... the last 3 nights we have had the same exact thing for dinner- kashi pizza and skinny cow deserts. Like I said, I have stayed within my calories- the problem is- I haven't been eating during the day so at the end of the day, I can eat an entire kashi pizza and have 2 skinny cow deserts and still have calories to spare. I know that this has been the problem... after all, there is a big difference between 1450 calories of healthy, balanced food and 1450 calories of crap. Today I am doing better- actually ate breakfast and lunch. Hopefully my weight will bounce back.

In other news, my surgery is scheduled for next Thursday (Waaay sooner than I thought it would be). I am happy to be getting it done and over. Hopefully I will feel better afterwards.

 

Have a great day everyone!

 

 

So I was thinking today about the TV show "The Biggest Looser". The contestants on it loose an incredible amount of weight very rapidly. Granted, they do it by eating right and working out- but it makes me wonder.  I can't count the number of times I have heard health professionals and dieticians preaching about how you should only loose an average of 2 pounds a week because any more than that is unsafe and you will probably gain it all back, thereby putting more stress on the body. So- what about these people on the show? They are losing a hell of a lot more than 2 pounds a week.

My husband and I aren't "fans" of the show- but we have watched a few episodes. He is of the opinion that if we both worked really hard we could see similar results at home. The thing is- I'm not so sure I want those results. I wonder if maybe- just maybe- they are disregarding the healthy way to loose in order to get ratings. After all, would any of us stick around to watch a show where the contestants only lost 2 pounds a week?

Don't get me wrong- I think it's a great show and I think it encourages people to lead a healthy life. It's actually one of the reasons I am re-starting my lifestyle. I guess I just question the safety and healthiness of rapid weight loss. It also bothers me that they don't seem to celebrate a loss unless it's over 10 pounds. Shouldn't any loss be celebrated? Anyways...

Today I felt like CRAP. I won't go into details but I woke up miserable and I spent the day miserable. My husband left for work and I was sitting on the couch thinking about the workout I should be doing. I had no motivation and decided that there was no way I was going to get on that elliptical. So I went to my computer and read some of your blogs and before I knew it I had the inspiration I needed! I put on my shoes, jumped on the elliptical and sweated away for 45 minutes. That was followed by a very nice workout on the bowflex. I felt great afterwards! I am so happy that I didn't let myself down. :-)

My calories for today are currently at 1190. I'm not even hungry. The last 2 days I haven't had much of an appetite but I'm assuming that will pass soon enough.

Hope everyone had a great day!!!!

Today wasn't exactly what I planned. I got up and had a nice breakfast with the hubby. I had planned on working out this morning but we ended up going out and by the time I got home I had a horrible headache and the heat index was at 100 degrees. Not to mention, mother nature decided to bless me with her gift this morning- and I'm not one of those women where that sort of gift goes unnoticed, if you know what I mean.

 

Needless to say, it's almost 7pm, my head is still throbbing, and I have yet to do my work out. Do I feel guilty? Maybe a little. But, I committed to 5 workouts a week so I still have tomorrow and Saturday to make up for it. I'm not going to let this tiny setback throw me off.

 

Today I decided that we would eat our big meal at lunch time. It worked out great for me calorie-wise as I still have 500 calories left to eat tonight. It just always seems like when I eat my big meal at night I am trying to squish it into my plan. I also didn't get as hungry throughout the day. Might have to keep this dinner-at-noon thing going!

 

Have a wonderful evening everyone!

 

I keep thinking of this phrase I heard once: Time is going to pass whether you're losing weight or not- so you might as well be losing it. These words have been running through my head lately as I think about just how long it's going to take me to get the healthy body I want. I get a little frustrated at the idea of this taking me over 6 months. But I am now trying to remind myself that 6 months is going to pass whether I am fat or thin, unhealthy or healthy- so I might as well plan on being the thin, healthy version when I get there. In the past I have gotten so discouraged over how long it's taking that I quit. I don't want to do that this time. I really need to get into the mindset that this is a lifestyle- not a diet... and even when all the weight is off, I am going to have to continue the healthy lifestyle to insure I don't get back to this place. I will admit that the idea of climbing onto that elliptical for the rest of my life is daunting.

On that note, my workout today consisted of:

45 minutes on the cursed elliptical

The full Bowflex beginners workout

30 minutes of stretching

 

Happily,  the muscle soreness I was having the first few days has gone away and I have a lot more energy today. Even the elliptical didn't kick my butt as bad today.

 

As far as calories go, the only problem I seem to be having is eating filling things. Going to hit the store this weekend and stock up on lots of fruits and veggies and fiber-filled foods. Hopefully then I won't be going to bed with a growling stomach!

 

Have a great day everyone!

Another day done and I am actually starting to feel better. Granted, I took a day off from the workout, (I decided 5 days a week was enough and I'll take my two days off separately to break up the monotony), but I stayed at my 1450 calories. I am finding it a bit hard to eat the things currently in my house- such as the boxed mac and cheese and several other packaged products. Looking at the calorie count of these items isn't too bad until you realize that you've been having about 4 servings for a meal the whole time.  For example, I weighed my cereal this morning and was shocked to discover that 1 serving didn't even cover the bottom of my bowl. Think I will stay away from cereal from now on- at least that brand.

A positive discovery: The sweet potato. I have always loved sweet potatoes but never realized just how good they are for you- and incredibly low calorie too! Instead of making up the not-so-healthy brown sugar covered version, I looked up a sweet potato fries recipe online and tried it out- HUGE success! Anyone wanting a healthy, filling snack should try this out: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/sandra-lee/sweet-potato-fries-recipe/index.html

Time for bed... didn't get much sleep last night. My goal tomorrow is to get my workout done before noon so I can enjoy the rest of my day.