01/03/2010 20:26
well..
I made whole wheat pancakes this morning. Pretty tasty, whole wheat flour, baking soda, brown sugar, and apple sauce. Yum! then nana and i went to walmart and practically bought out the place like we usually do. But! I found the Jillian Michaels Calorie pills... I'll test them out. The Lipo 6 I had yesterday just makes me more hungry lol. No gym today, it's a rest day. Watching football and relaxing today. yay. Not much else is new. Maybe I'll write more later...
Posted By: Crystal2105
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01/02/2010 23:22
No more emotional eating!
Easier said than done. I want to sit here and say that I will no longer be an emotional eater.. HAHA. Yea right. I'll try. But this just all came about because yet again, Vin made me upset.. and guess what I had... Yep that cheesecake that's been haunting me for days now! But the good thing is, I had 11 pts when I ate it. So If I don't eat anymore points for the rest of the night (it's 5:30pm now) then I'll be fine with my points. I'll only have gone 7 points over for the day... which isn't too bad.
I went to GNC to check on supplements. They told me to try Lipo 6 for women. Um, not sure I'm a fan. It makes me whacko I think. lol. I might just stick to CLA. Stupid fat! Just go away!! I'll be up all night now that I took that Lipo 6. Damn and I was hoping to just relax with a book tonight. Maybe I'll tell Vin not to come over, since he told me I was jealous and controlling today. And then took it back and said he was sorry he just wasn't himself. I don't care. Don't hurt my feelings, jerk!
I think I'm gunna do some more research and see if I can find anything else about other fat burners. Maybe I should just lose the weight naturally. I feel like if I got a little kick in the butt tho, it might help me a little. I don't know. I could use a drink. Haha. Alright well, I hope everyone is doing well. I'll let you know what I find out! ttys
Posted By: Crystal2105
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01/02/2010 17:49
Saturday!
So Vin came over last night and everything was good. We talked and hung out and just cuddled. It's so great when it's just me and him. I wish it was like that all the time. SO last night I came up with an idea! For some reason my friends and I were joking around about how it would be funny if I was a body builder (because they think I'm already musclualr) haha which I am. So I was looking into body building. I'm not going to be a body builder per se, but they have figure competitions. I might strive for something like that. I was also looking into supplements. They all drink some sort of protein drink (which I do too, sometimes when I want to use the points. But they drink it everyday. I think today I'm gunna go to GNC, the supplement company and just talk with them about my choices.
I do love lifting weights. I love lifting weights WAY more than I like to do cardio. It's true. I know a lot of women are afraid of getting HUGE! But I think it's really difficullt to accidently do that. That actually has to be your goal. So before I go I think I'll research a little more and then talk with them. Maybe get on the right track. Who knows. But the gym was great this morning :) So that's a plus!! I'll report later on what I've found! Talk to you all soon!
Posted By: Crystal2105
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01/01/2010 23:42
Ahh The HUNGER MONSTER IS AFTER ME!
Ive had the worst hungry horrors today. The worst part is that the past few days I knowww I'm gunna get my period but it still hasn't come yet. I even cleaned the whole entire house... right before my period is the only time I actually enjoy cleaning lol. So, I wish it would just come and be over with so I don't have to be so cranky. I hate being cranky. yuck! So I was doing well. Like I said I'm gunna write everything down. I was doing well and then Vin didn't say bye to me on the phone. Ugh. Why did that make me mad?! I don't know. But he's coming over in a bit and hopefully we can talk and discuss our issues. I hope. But today I didn't go to the gym then this is what I ate...
2 packets of low sugar oatmeal- 6pts
fiber one bar- 2
lebanese meat pie- I'm guessing 8 pts. I actually have no idea, I can't find the info for it.. if anyone can tell me that would be awesome!
Pistachio nuts- I ate so many... ugh. I love them. Who brought them into the house?! Darrrrrn it! I think I ate 8 pts worth of nuts.
carrots- 1
wrap- 1
turkey- 1
fat free cheese- 1
cream for coffee- 2 = 30pts hmm. I guess that's not THAT bad, and the things I ate weren't TERRIBLE for me. I just need to watch it the rest of the week. I was doing well. I can't let my period get in the way of my success!
Gym in the AM. I'm planning on doing a lot of cardio and a lot of arms. Maybe I'll go for 2 hours tomorrow. That's a good idea. Mhmmm. I can't wait until all of the holiday food is out of the house. we still have like 3 pies including a cheesecake. I hate to waste it, I want to bring it to a food pantry or soemthing so I don't eat it, but nana wants to eat it. If nana opens it then I might want to eat some. I can't let the pie call my name! Yucky pie!!
I went to the store the other day to buy groceries and my main goal was to buy healthy natural foods. I did. These past few days I just realized how much I actually SNACK on those 100 calorie packs. And so many other processed treats. I mean how can shortbread cookies be nutritionally good for you. They just can't. So, because I need a chocolate fix here and there I decided to buy chocolate protein powder. I had some yesterday and it satisfied my chocolate craving.
Starting tomorrow I'm going on a strict diet. I think I need to shock my system. I've been on weight watchers for so long.. Maybe I random new diet will me good. Maybe I should just count calories for a week and do it that way. I'll try it.
Okay well I'm gunna look up different diets to try. If I find a good one I'll let you know!Talk to you all soon! I hope you had a great New YEars!
Posted By: Crystal2105
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01/01/2010 14:42
2010
Here we are, 2010... Seems like just yesterday was the New Millenium when everyone was freaking out because they thought the world was gunna end, because the computers weren't programed that high. Haha. Oh world... It's gunna be the same for 2012. I know everyone feels differently about this, but I really don't think the world will end in 2012... I don't know. Why worry about it. Whatever happens, happens.
So last night went well. I ate a lot more than anticipated. But I was going around taking pictures of everyone and my shoes were KILLLLLING my feet by the end of it. I left about 11:45 and was driving down the road when it turned 2010. In the car, by myself. When I came home my grandmother was still out haha. Oh well. Saved me calories, made me money, and saved me getting into any kind of trouble.
I was thinking about going to the gym today. I should go and just have a light workout at least. I've been good and I've been going everyday. So I think maybe my body and my muscles could use a day rest to recooperate. that's what I'm thinking. But then again, I'm not sure If I'm just talking myself out of going to the gym... Vin asked me to come over this morning. I got no text no phone call at 12 o' clock. I woke up at 7:45 this morning to a text that said "good morning" He did tell me that he was going to shut off his phone so he didn't text anyone. He's a drunk texter. SO I guess that's the excuse I have for that.
Hmm, what else.. I just ate 2 packets of oatmeal. I'm planning on starting to record everything I eat, starting today again. That's my goal. I have my book in the other room. PLus today is a friday, I'm gunna make a new weigh in sheet. Tomorrow is my fat book day, where I take pictures of myself in a sports bra and shorts and put it in a scrap book and write the date. (very motivational to look back on) sometimes I put quotes in there too. SO let's do this people! Back on track 2010. We can do it! Forget everyone who kicks us down and tells us we can't!!! Enjoy life while we have it! I hope everyone has a fabulous day! I have a few things to do, then I think I'm gunna go to the gym! :)
Posted By: Crystal2105
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12/31/2009 20:51
Eating my feelings.
I had to blog because I started to eat my feelings.. and I can't! I won't I need to stop now! Here's my story... I may be over reacting... I don't know. Vin and I met up to go out for breakfast, I found this great choice on the menu. 2 low cholestoral eggs, whole wheat toast and turkey bacon! Woo! I was so proud of myself.. THEN we were sitting waiting for the guy to bring us the check and he said.. i wonder how this got on my phone and he showed me a picture of myself.. then he was scrolling through, and he says.. "oh i can do this later," then put his phone away. I said "do what later, lemme see" he said, "trust me you don't want to see" with a lot of persistance he finally handed his phone over and he had a folder labeled "ma lady" on the phone and tons of pics of his ex. I just handed it back to him. Didn't say anything. The bill came and he says "I don't get paid until tomorrow".... sooooo why'd you ask me to go out to breakfast?!" AHH.
So I was heated. I still am pissed. But I asked him to delete them. He said he did. I'm not sure if I believe him. Maybe I'm just being a "jealous girlfriend on her period"... I don't know. It still seems crappy to me... so I came home and started eating pistachios and then a sugar cookie.. and I ate a fiber one bar. 9 pts on feelings. Stupid boys.
I hate that my in my entries i keep talking about Vin, but I am such an emotional eater, that it just seems like it helps when I talk about him. Even if no one reads it. I don't mind. It's just getting it off my chest and sorting my thoughts... With that said... Pros and Cons to Vin...
Pro:
-He's good to my grandmother
- He's good in other things ( not that you guys wanted to know, but it is important)
- He at least weighs more than I do
- He's cuddly
- He's introduced me to his friends
...
Con:
- He's a really mean drunk. He can be very degrading.
- When we first started dating he told me the only reason he is dating me is because I was on a diet, because he doesn't date fat girls.
- He's 31 and lives at home (not a big deal under most circumstances... I usually wouldn't care)
-He's cheap. He doesn't leave a tip at all when we go out. And sometimes he'll ask me to leave the tip.
- He thinks he's in incredible shape (he's not, he's chubby.. very chubby.)
- He thinks he knows everything about dieting.
- He's not handy in the least (he didn't even know how to change a fuse in his car...)
- He thinks he works out so hard in the gym and when we go together all I see is him standing around.
- He's got pics on ex's on his phone.
...
If I think of more I'll add them, but right now it looks as though the cons out weigh the pros, and we've only been dating for 2 months now. Awesome! I wish I could just go to sleep now, but I have to go and take pictures for New Years Eve tonight. It's a terrible thought, but I actually hope Vin gets drunk tonight with his friends. He's a drunk texter. So If he texts me mean things.. then I'll have a reason to go on a break for a while.
I've been through a lot, with my weight and with life. I've grown physically and mentally. I used to be extremely shy. I used to care about what people thought of me. I used to always worry about what the pretty girls thought of me. I have learned... When I lost all of the weight and got skinny, that's when everyone comes out of the woodwork. That's when you meet a lot of people. That's when people will actually talk to you like a human being and not some animal.. and that's when you realize who your friends are. It isn't these people who come out of the woodwork... no no. It's the ones who have been by your side the whole time. BUTTTT talking to everyone else, you realize that no one is perfect. They have their own issues. Maybe they look amazing on the outside, but really... everyone is human. I really wish people wouldn't judge others so much.. I think everyone would be happier. I love my friends so much, and I would be lost without them. To them it doesn't matter what my body looks like. Thanks to my friends and family who have supported me I am a much stronger person than I once was when I started my weight loss journey and I guess that's what this transformation is all about.. mind body and soul.. to find yourself. I think I finally have, and I think I'm a beautiful person. No one will bring me down. No one will talk down to me. No one will stand in the way of my dreams... I guess that is what I have accomplished in 2009! Now to look forward to 2010, and the old me, rediscovered :)
Posted By: Crystal2105
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12/31/2009 14:22
Body Log
I just decided to measure myself WITHOUT looking at my old measurements first. If I look at the old measurements first sometimes I'll try and cheat and sqeeze the tape measure tighter or something like that :) But here are my results based upon the last time I measured myself in July...
Thighs- Lost 1.5in
Calfs- Lost .75in
Hips- Lost 4.5 in!!!
Biceps- Lost .5 in
Chest- Lost 2in
My neck and forearms were the same. But it figures I'd lose 2 inches in my chest... which is the one thing I actually want to keep haha. Oh well. I think I'm actually more excited about losing .5 in my Biceps than 4.5 in my hips. Just because I HATE my arms with so much passion it's rediculous! I have the worst flabby arms you've ever seen. One of these days I'll take a picture of them.
I guess I'll just continue what I've been doing at the gym. I guess it's been working. I need to do more arm exercises though. Maybe I'll look some up before I go to the gym in a bit. I have to work tonight up at the Golf Course. lol I am the New Year's Eve photographer. haha. I hope they know that I only took 1 class in photography. lol This might be a disaster. No drinking tonight! That's why I took the job. I'm trying to seriously cut back my drinking. Not that I drink everyday. I haven't even been that bad. Maybe it was just all the holiday egg nog. I can not wait until the holidays are behind us... Can't wait.
I saw Vin last night, but he was being a little stand off ish. I dont know whats up with him. Who knows. He's going out for New Years. And I have to work. Better off I guess.
I can't talk about boys. They stress me out haha. Let's get back on the subject of gym. lol. I need to go. I hope everyone has a great New Year's!! I'll let everyone know how my photography adventure went! Woo! I hope everyone does well with food and exercise today too! Talk to you all soon!
Posted By: Crystal2105
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12/30/2009 18:13
Bloggin two days in a row!
So I'm back! Yesterday I wasn't very good in the afternoon. I don't really know why I didn't blog about this. Maybe because I was excited about being back on EP? I dunno. Anyway. My bestfriends are home from school, on break, and we all went out to lunch... to my "safe" restaurant or so I thought. They had this meal- chicken breast and a side of steamed veggies. That's all it was, and I was so pumped they had it. I went to Bobby Burnes yesterday and guess what?! They took it off the menu!!! Are you kidding me?! Ahh so I had Baked Scrod, that was baked with butter and wine. Yea, not so great. So then I was mad and decided to order apple crisp after. haha. So much for that restaurant descision making. But, before I go next time I'll get a soup and 1/2 a sandwich. I saw that on the menu there. What's up with all the restaurants around here getting rid of their healthy choice menus?! Not fair!
What else? I slept at home last night and didn't see Vin at all last night, or this morning. I think he's mad at me... he didn't try to call though. So I guess it's nice to have 5 minutes peace to figure things out!
This morning I went to the gym, pumped some iron.. then did 1/2 hr cardio. I wasn't really feelin' the cardio this morning. I need to get into a jogging routine. A fun one. I think I'd be more likely to burn more calories if I did other activties besides jog on the treadmill or do the elliptical for 45 minutes.. I can't wait until it's warm out. I can start rollerblading, and hiking.. I love being outside. I don't mind the weights at the gym. But sitting there on the elliptical staring at myself in the mirror is not my idea of fun. No SIR!
So after the gym I went to the grocery store and stocked up on all healthy foods I can take with me to work. Pack my lunch! I'm excited! The other girl behind the desk. Her name is Kelly. She is the tiniest girl I've ever met. Not an OUNCE of fat on her body. And guess what?! She doesn't exercise and she eats all fried food! At first I envied her for it. Well, I still kinda do... but if you think about it... sometimes obese people are more in shape than skinny people. My friend Kelsey is skinny, but she's the most out of shape person I know. It's just one of those things. At least we have fat to show ourselves that we need to keep our body healthier. It's like a little reminder... or a big reminder... haha. Oh well, just trying to look at the upside of being chubby wubby!! I hope everyone had a great day. Maybe I'll write more tonight! Bye!
Oh and P.S. because of my restaurant adventure I woke up this morning weighing 173... Stupid Bobby Burnes!!
Posted By: Crystal2105
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12/29/2009 23:20
Mini Tracker
SO, one last thing! I just checked my weight trackers and I had a mini goal one set for Christmas, and it was set to 170. So I did pretty well! Yay!! Next one! Jan 8th, 169lbs!
Posted By: Crystal2105
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12/29/2009 23:16
Back again
Haha, I know I said I was back last blog, and that I was back for good... but Holiday's happen. You know how it is. I think the problem is I don't have much down time, or alone time. With the new boyfriend, we're always togther and the computer is the last thing that we have on the agenda. I guess I should make some ME time. Well, the good news is, I've been pretty good. I lost weight since the last time I blogged. SO that's great. The bad news is... we still have left over delicious food that can easily be consumed in this coming week.. which I'll have my period. We all know how that goes. But I think I can stay on track. I hope. I think . I finally got a job, working at the gym that I go too. SO that'll be motivation. The only thing I'm worried about it working with the beautiful extremely skinny people behind the desk.. Maybe it'll motivate me more? I'm not sure. But I know if I have a job at the gym, I'll use the gym a lot. And stay away from food. So I guess that's the good news!
Boyfriend drama. I love Vin, he's a great guy. But only when he's not drunk. He can get so mean when he's drunk and I hate it. That's the only real downside. But it's a huge prblem. He cooks for me, he's sweet every other time. But he can be so degrading and mean when he's drunk. And he doesn't tip. At all. So I guess I could say I'm having second thoughts right now. He doesn't know it... but I am. Maybe I'm too picky, but we've only been dating for 2 months, I don't think he has any right to make me feel like crap. SO. I'll keep you posted on that situation...
What else? Christmas was good. The whole fam was over and I cooked for them! I hope everyone else had a great Holiday as well.
Well, let's just hope I keep going in the right direction and I break the 170 barrier before JAN 8. That's my goal! Okay! Well I hope everyone has a happy holiday if I don't get back on here! TTYS!
Posted By: Crystal2105
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