I won't let them be right!!

So 2.5 years after I started my weight loss journey where am i?

 

Well I lost 5stone 1.5lb (171.5lb) and then put 15lb back on again. 

 

I've managed not to put any more on since about November but I'm good for a week, bad for a week etc etc. 

 

I just don't know what has happened, I want to be good, I want to get down to my lowest weight again but I just can't do it.  I don't have the motivation I did and I just can't get it back for any length of time.  My clothes are getting tight but I'm fed up of eating healthy food and I love tasty junk and if I'm honest I'm depressed at the thought of having to eat like this for the rest of my life!  I'm such a foody and being slim denies me of doing all the baking etc I love as I'd just eat it all!  Even my fiance says I was happier when I was overweight - isn't that bizzare - it's meant to be the other way round!  I have to change that and not prove the negative people who say "you'll put it all back on" wrong.

 

The most bizarre thing is that now I should have the most motivation I've ever had as I'm getting married in December!  I've a lovely fitted dress ordered and I know it will look better if I lose one of the bellies (I have two but I used to have three )

But there's no pressure as I know it'll still look ok and I was inbetween sizes and they ordered the bigger one so I have leeway!  not the right attitude I know!

 

Anyway...

 

That's it it stops now enough moaning!  Today is a new day and it's time for positive action! I can't promise I'll blog every day but I hoping this will motivate me and make me a bit more accountable.  There are so many of you on here that have done so well and are such inspirations if that doesn't help what will!

 

Sorry about the moan but I'll not do it again! 

 

So my target is to lose 2lb before I go to Amsterdam for a few days on the 20th.  Even that few lbs and losing some of the bloating will make my clothes fit much better!

 

welcome back

...

You can moan on here as much as you like - that's what it for. That's the first thing!

The next thing is that you have lost SO much weight, really compared to that the 15lbs you have gained is not a huge deal, YOU CAN LOSE THIS! when you have lost so much before...if you want to.

I guess in the end it comes down to how much do you want to do this? I know it's really tough becasue I've lost stones of weight twice in the past and each time I have been truly unhappy, and this has seriously affected my motivation to get the weight off this time. I'm trying to lose weight now becasue I am seriously jeopardising my health at this weight, so I am doing it for that, and not "to be happy". For me doing it "to be happy" is no motivation at all.

I completely and totally understand what you are saying about wanting to eat junk and feeling depressed about having to eat in a restricted way and not doing the baking. I love baking too. What I have decided to do is to use Weightwatchers receipes and bake one thing each week, a cake, or biscuits, or tea loaf, and I cut it into the suggested portions and have it as a treat within my points. I've also promised myself I won't eat any cake, biscuits etc that I haven't made myself, that way I can't just keep stuffing, and I do get bake.

Sorry to ramble on, I hope that something I've said might help you find a way through, even if in the end you decided to stay as you are.