Starting over!
Okay, so there has been some big time drama in my life lately and, well, I have not been able to focus on taking care of myself...so here I am, weighing in at a whopping 154.8. And feeling pretty gross and unhealthy. Mentally and physically. So, last week I decided to break free from the drama for one night and do something for myself. I went back to my Weight Watchers meeting. I literally was fighting back tears the entire time I was there. I was hardly paying attention to what the leader was saying. I was there to observe and absorb. I looked around the room at all of the inspirational posters, the "props" prominently displayed, ready to help and guide you on your weight loss journey, the pictures and inspirational stories of proud successful members. And I listened to the other members at the meeting. I listened as they laughed together, shared stories, encouraged and helped each other. I missed that so much. That sense of community and support. That is what has been missing from my life lately...SUPPORT. I could not support myself and I could not reach out to others because I was so wrapped up in the emotional turmoil in my life that I forgot anyone else was there. So, I cried. I let myself feel and experience my emotions. It was OK. I was going to get back to doing something for ME. Taking care of ME. And my leader stopped me on my way out and gave me a big hug and said "welcome back." And that was all I needed. I was back. It was time.
I didn't weigh in at that meeting last week but last night I went back again and started over. I weighed in, got a new card, new materials, even participated in the meeting. And I feel good. I feel confident and powerful. I am taking control. I even feel as though I am better able to control and deal with the drama in my life because now I finally care about me and doing what is right for me. Not only am I going to work on getting back to my goal weight, but I am going to work on improving my life as a whole. Big changes are coming... and I am ready for them!