Up, down, up, down...my weight is going up and down. I honestly hate being a woman sometimes. I have been on my best behavior for the past couple few weeks and it seems that ovulation and my period just sabotage me! Today was a good weigh in, down 2.4, but still, that only means I'm actually down 0.4 since I blogged "I'm Back!" 3 weeks ago. But I won't give up.
If any of you read my last post, you saw that I had a miscarriage and my goal was to lose some weight before I try to conceive again. That goal is still in place. I had a battery of tests to see if there could be chromosomal/blood issues as the cause for my miscarriage and they all came out negative. That's great news but it still leaves me with a mystery as to why my body doesn't like to carry babies to term. I am thankful for my two living sons but it still bothers me that I have five angels and no reason why. So all I can do is try and make myself as healthy as possible so that the next time I get pregnant, God willing, my baby will be okay.
One of my goals in addition to losing weight is to improve my health overall. Eating cleaner and better, taking my supplements and exercise. Thanks to a friend, I have now begun fermenting both water and milk kefir. It's a great source of healthy probiotics that will promote gut health, even better than yogurt. Milk kefir makes wonderful smoothies and water kefir makes the best lemonade I have ever had! If you are unsure of what kefir is, Google it! Look up some videos on YouTube. You might want to start fermenting your own yourself!
Another thing I'm working on is eliminating processed food where I can. I can proudly say I have not bought a loaf of store bought bread in the house in a month. Instead, I am baking! I formulated a great soft white bread recipe that my sons love so much that they don't miss the Wonderbread Kids I used to get for them. For myself, I've formulated a recipe for a nice wheat. Soon, I will be sprouting my own grains and grinding my own wheat to make my version of sprouted bread, or Ezekiel bread. (I just need to save up to purchase a super good blender like a Vitamix or Blendtec -- unless someone can tell me if the Ninja is really "just as good" as I've heard.) I've been preparing more meals from scratch and using less prepackaged products.
Don't get me wrong...I am by no means turning into one of those people who suddenly turn all healthy and shun other stuff. We still stop and get McDonald's every now and then, and I still enjoy a prepackaged snack or goodie once in a while. I'm just trying to reduce how much I turn to those because in the past, it was more than "once in a while".
Exercise is still my hardest goal. It so happens that this week I had a ton to do so I got in so much walking that I was inadvertently exercising. This week I start a walking regimen with a friend. She also slacks when it comes to exercise and we will be each other's support. We've agreed to meet up and go walking. We didn't set a time or distance limit. We will just get together with our kids and walk and see where it takes us.
So I'm on the right track, I think, for summer. My 20th high school reunion is at the end of July and it would be divine if I could be down at least 15 pounds by then. I need to lose way more but for me, that would feel like an accomplishment. I hope all of you are doing well! Take care of yourselves!
Although I'm not completely "over" my miscarriage (and I'm sure I never will be) I'm ready to work on my plan to drop some weight before I try to conceive again. My OB helped to give me the motivation I needed in the form of the words "high blood pressure"! In all my life, even when I was over 400 pounds, I have never had high blood pressure. Nor have I ever had high cholesterol. I always assumed that I was one of those people who were predisposed to excellent pressure and cholesterol because how could someone so fat be so healthy? I always rate at 114/70 and never higher than 140 with cholesterol. Now, in truth, my blood pressure wasn't that high during my visit last week. It was 130/80. But still, knowing that high blood pressure and high cholesterol do run in my family have me running scared. The doctor said it could be due to my miscarriage as that can set the body awry. But still the visions of me dropping dead of a heart attack or stroke and leaving my children motherless immediately played out in my head. I am also in denial about my getting older () so I refuse to admit that maybe, since I'm 38, this comes with the territory. Either way, I need to do something!
So, the game plan is work on dropping some weight but also working on that blood pressure. I'm taking iron to try and get my blood back to "normal" since my existing anemia was made worse by the miscarriage. I'm also going to work on drinking way more water and eating way less sodium. Exercise is key, so I need to stop being so lazy and move. At least 30 minutes a day, I should be able to do that. Finally, I'm going to find some kind of way to relax. I don't know if it's residual effects of my loss but I've been a very short tempered, snappy lady for several weeks. I've even caught myself grimacing while doing something that is usually relaxing, like writing this blog. I'm thinking yoga. I've always shied away from yoga because I'm so uncoordinated but then I saw this video and decided if he can do it, so can I. I'm hoping all this will help me be a healthier me when I decide to try and conceive again because I really want to minimize, as much as I can, the risk of anything going wrong once more.
So here we go. Again. But this time the prize I want is too big to let my goals slip.
So I went MIA soon after I swore to get "back on track" but I had a good reason. I found out I was pregnant. It was a surprise pregnancy, totally unexpected, but I suppose that me being a grown woman I can't really call it an accident as I should know how to prevent those by now.
Anyway, the sad news is I ended up miscarrying my baby at about 12 weeks along, March 19th. It's my fifth loss but it doesn't get any easier. Anyway, I've done my mourning and I've come to a decision. Even though we were essentially done with having kids (we have two beautiful sons), this loss has awaken something in me so now we've agreed to try and conceive again. One more time. But this time I want to be in better health. Although, at the moment, I don't know what caused the lost (pathology reports haven't come back yet and I go for blood testing for disorders in May) I feel that my health had a lot to do with it. I wasn't on prenatals, I was heavier than I'd ever been with previous pregnancies...there were just a lot of factors. This time I'm going to go into it with my eyes opened.
So far I've lost a little weight (I plan to lose more), I'm drinking tons of green tea so I can put those antioxidants to work, I'm eating cleaner and healthier and...as much as I hate it...I am going to start moving more. My OB says I have to wait until I have 2 normal cycles before we can try to conceive, so I'm going to say that would be sometime late summer. If I can lose at least 20 pounds and detox, I'll feel better about trying to conceive. This, coupled with my 20th high school reunion, should be all the motivation I need to see my goals to the end. Here's to thinking positive to achieve positive results! I'd love to be blogging about my new baby son or daughter this time next year.
Wow, talk about fluctuations! A week from my post on New Year's day, I dropped almost 5 pounds. Then this week, I gained it all back plus 0.2 ounces. I know it's not really a "gain" per se, that some unhealthy eating habits (not eating choices, mind you, because I stuck to good, clean foods) caused my gain. I was eating late at night, eating too many carbs, albeit healthy carbs, and lots and lots of salt. It's a shame that a lot of healthy foods are so bland, so your choices are either to salt or sugar them to flavorfulness. Well, lesson learned. Actually, this is the millionth time I've learned this lesson, but my memory must be short because I always seem to forget.
Activity. Non-existent this week. Why do I abhor movement so much?! And I went out and purchased Just Dance 3 just for the sole purpose of moving more! I know myself, and I know that once I get started on an exercise regimen, if I don't stop I get addicted. So what do I need to do to get there? I guess just shut up and do it, right?
I know everything there is about losing weight. I'm an expert. As are more overweight people. We do. We know all the tips, tricks, diets that work, methods, plans...we know all this because we are the ones who have employed them all and done them over and over. But why can't we get them to work?! I absolutely refuse to go into 2013 as a two-hundred pounder. 87 pounds in 12 months should be doable. That's a little over 7 pounds a month. There is no reason why I can't do it. I just need to crack the whip and be extra hard on myself, to stop wallowing in my own self pity and giving up just because of one or two slips.
Here's to a better week for me...a better week for all!
I suspect I'll be seeing a lot of blogs similar to mine today. Happy New Year! =)
So here I am! I made it through the holidays. While I didn't really diet during the holidays, I am glad to say that I DIDN'T GAIN ANY WEIGHT! Yay! At my weigh in today I found that I am down 0.7 pounds. Traditionally, I gain at least 10 pounds over the holidays, so how nice to see this loss, no matter how tiny, instead of a gain. This is the motivation I needed to keep going.
I really want 2012 to be the year I lose the weight and get healthy. I know I say that every year, but this year I really want this, so bad that I can taste it! A big motivator was what happened when I went to go read to my son's 1st grade class just before Christmas. As I was getting ready to take my place to read the story, I hear one of my son's classmates say to another classmate "Wow! B's mom is SO BIG!" It wasn't that my feelings were hurt, because they weren't because I understand children will be children. It was the fact being driven home that B's classmates and friends are taking notice and will probably say things like this often. I don't want to embarrass my son or make him feel like he has to defend my honor. I don't want him to have to see his mother be the butt of "Yo' Mama" jokes either.
Again, I'm not aiming for skinny. I'm aiming for healthy, better shape, and to build more stamina and get more active. I believe all those tie in with losing some weight, so here I go. I'm doing hCG again, to give me that big boost I need to really get motivated. Then I'll probably go back onto Weight Watchers, to lose the rest slowly. I know it takes time, so my goal for 2012 is to get down to under 200 pounds (199 is just fine!) by the next new year. I think I can lose 87 pounds in a year. Best of luck to you all as well!
I mean you CAN but it's hard. I haven't been on in a week because I was a bit under the weather. Between AF visiting and then a 2-day bout with sinus headaches and general aches, I couldn't really watch my diet like I wanted to. Today's result? Up 2.2 pounds. I had hit-or-miss days. Some days I'd eat like I should have, then some days I barely ate. Of course, that sabotaged me because when I did finally eat I totally ATE. I'm hoping that part of this 2.2 is water because I have been liberal with the salty foods.
I'm going to a three day anime convention that starts tonight! I'm so excited. AnimeUSA right here in the DC area. I'm such an otaku that it doesn't make sense. Anyway, I wish I had a pedometer because I get in tons of walking at these things and I don't really stop to eat much because there is so much to see and do that eating is a luxury. I'll probably pack some snacks that have an energetic punch, like apples or protein bars. And as much as I hate water, this is the one time I drink tons of it. Something about being in a crowd and all that walking just makes me crave it.
Thanksgiving is next week. I wanted to be down 5-7 pounds by then, so hopefully I'll make it. I'm only down 2.6 since my starting but maybe I can squeeze out another 2.5 pounds in a week. Here's hoping!
Yeah...I forgot my first rule of dieting...start AFTER my period. Of course the day I started the low calorie diet for hCG she had to come visit. But I've been persevering and have managed to drop 3 pounds nonetheless. I'm starving, though. For some reason when she is visiting, I get hungry 24/7 and the cravings are killer, but I'm fighting them! My goal for the moment is to see how much weight I can drop before Thanksgiving day. I will be cheating that day. I know, it sounds bad to plan a cheat but I know I won't be able to resist mashed potatoes and gravy to go along with my turkey or a slice of pumpkin pie. I'll try not to overdo it but on that day I want to just relax.
Cardio. Exercise. I've yet to do any. Shame on me. But I'll start adding something in soon. I've just been lazy. I need one of those "Biggest Loser" coaches here to kick me into gear. The thing is, from my personal experience, whenever I've started exercising daily, it has become almost addicting. I would honestly feel compelled to work out and if I didn't, I felt bad. But all it takes is 2 days to knock me off my routine. Two days of not exercising and the addiction is out of my system. How do you keep motivated?
The low calorie diet for hCG begins today. I spent the past two days loading -- eating anything and everything in sight, so I am pretty tired of food right now. Of course, experience tells me that will be short-lived after a day of eating just 500-800 calories, but I have GOT to get this weight down. Being a SAHM makes dieting a bit harder, because I have opportunity to eat. When I was working, dieting was a little easier because I had work to do, so I couldn't wander to the fridge a thousand times or had to get snacks for my boys. So I figured what I need is some busy work!
Last year, I started learning Korean because although I am half, I never learned and I'd like to go visit my relatives at some point and figured learning the language couldn't hurt. I let that fall to the wayside but now I think studying it on my own could be just the busy work I need. I've also started homeschool preschool with my 2.5 year old. He'll be going to school next year so it can't hurt to give him a boost. I'm hoping with that on my plate in between playing with him and my 6 year old that, hopefully, food won't be so much of a focus.
I'm dusting off my Wii Fit Plus game as well. And my Just Dance 2 game. I do not move nearly enough so, although this is starting small, it's starting. Water is going to be troublesome. I hate water and my goal is to drink half my body weight in ounces daily. I know I could doctor it up with Crystal Light or something, but I need to get into the habit of drinking plain water. Last time I did hCG and was drinking water, I have to say my skin was so much healthier and smoother. I will allow myself a little squeeze of lemon, but that's it.
Here's hoping to a great start for me and best of luck to you all who are also on the journey. We can do this!
I'm back and I have to make this work. After losing about 15 pounds on my rounds, I'm sad...no...ashamed!...to say that I've regained about 11 of those pounds. I've put myself back on hCG as of today because if I don't lose weight, I will be at 300 by Christmas. This is my favorite time of year and every year, like clockwork, I gain anywhere from 10-20 pounds between Halloween and Valentine's Day. My goal this year is to avoid any gain and, hopefully, start the New Year a bit leaner.
It's funny how I can lie to myself. As the clothes that I purchased after the 18 pound loss started to get tighter, I kept making excuses. The jeans were tight because I just washed them...my knees and ankles were hurting again because I insisted on carrying my 2 year old more that I should...my skin was breaking out again because my hormones must be changing because I'm older. I had a reason for every thing that was letting me know I was gaining weight, but I totally would NOT get on a scale until this morning - so deep down I knew what the cause was.
So here we go again. After my first hCG round I found it too hard to do it again successfully. It's a damn difficult diet plan that works, but it's tedious. I'm just going to have to suck it up. If I can get down about 30-40 pounds on a few rounds of hCG, then I'll switch to WW to get down the rest. I just need a good buffer between me and 300 pounds. Blogging, I hope, will help me to stick to my goal. It kind of keeps me accountable. (Notice I haven't been on here while I was backsliding?)
So here's hoping I muster the willpower from somewhere. Maybe I'll print out that recent pic of me where I looked like a squirrel hiding nuts in her cheeks. Or that one picture from a recent party that was taken of me from behind. Talk about your eye openers. Good luck to everyone else! Have a great week!
So...I got to the point where I was tired of dieting, tired of watching my menu, tired of it all so I took myself a little break. I now see why there is a suggested 6 weeks in between rounds -- even though my body did fine starting the hcg earlier, I was just mentally burned out. So I stopped for 3 weeks. During that time, I didn't exactly watch what I was eating so I ended up gaining 3.2 pounds. Not too bad.
I started loading on Saturday, July 30th. I guess I did it right this time because today, the first day of my low calorie protocol for hcg, I'm at 285.7! That means I gained 6.7 pounds loading! I hope I drop it fast, that it is mostly water. So today will mark my real return to hcg...hopefully. Since I'm not going to count my 2 load days, today will be day one. So I'm on Round 2 (R2), Phase 2 (P2), Day 1 (D1). I'm actually looking forward to getting on the scale tomorrow AM.
I have a mini-goal, to lose 5 pounds (on top of the 6.7 I gained loading) by 8/13. I am meeting with some friends who saw me at the end of my first round, and I'd like to be down a little bit more than the last time they saw me in June. Two weeks to lose 11.7 times is actually quite feasible on hcg, so hopefully that will motivate me to stick to protocol. We'll see!
) so I refuse to admit that maybe, since I'm 38, this comes with the territory. Either way, I need to do something!
Shame on me. But I'll start adding something in soon. I've just been lazy. I need one of those "Biggest Loser" coaches here to kick me into gear. The thing is, from my personal experience, whenever I've started exercising daily, it has become almost addicting. I would honestly feel compelled to work out and if I didn't, I felt bad. But all it takes is 2 days to knock me off my routine. Two days of not exercising and the addiction is out of my system. How do you keep motivated?