I think there are so many times in our lives that we tend to become overwhelmed. We tend to over do it, and burn ourselves out. There are so many things we want to put our whole hearts, minds and beings into. Just because we strive for goals in our life, and sometimes come up short. Or pace ourselves. Doesnt mean our hearts have abandoned the cause. Its just a matter of getting the heart, mind, and will power to all one place. A place that is comfy for us, and not on the burn out side. What is right for one, might not be right for another. Its finding the happy median, your happy place, the place where you are at your peak but not ready to tumble down the hill.
After spending 2 days in bed with a migraine, I am much better, and ready to kick butt first...take names later. To my surprise, my husband kept the house intact. Even fed the kids. Even did laundry. Woohooo...I think hes trying to score brownie points lately. lol..
I have been thinking about so many instances in my life where I have been made fun of for being larger, or when you go to the store and the skinny jackass behind the counter stares at you like, why are you buying this? What reminded me of this is...I went out this week and there was someone that was severely obese, and these teens were laughing and snickering. You could seriously see the horror on the mans face.
Empathy: the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, the thoughts, feelings and experiences of another.
My heart was breaking for the man. If only people knew how their actions and words effect others. Why do we as a society place so much emphasis on the outer shell? I know we are all trying to improve ourselves and there is nothing wrong with that. Its when it overflows into pointing, gesturing, and name calling that I have a problem with. I mean none of us are guilt free from the snicker factor but since I began this trip of a new me....I have started to notice the way I treat others, and how others treat me. Maybe we need to have a little more empathy. Like the saying goes...You never know what someone else has been through until you walk a mile in their shoes.
Ok, enough deepness today....Here is a funny...forever, I have noticed I had a HUGE dimple in my butt...yea not really eye appealing. Well, I was in the shower this morning and I felt for the dimple and OMG to my shock, it was just a small dip. I was like holy cow!!!! I was totally amazed that I called NASA and told them I didnt need the Mars Rover now to explore the crater on my butt.
It was an amazingly quiet weekend. My mom had both the kids and it was my husbands first weekend off in a long time. My house was TOO quiet. That eerie quiet. I say that I need a break from the kids, but when they are actually gone, I spend the whole time missing them, wondering what they are doing, and wanting those baby hugs!
Friday, my husband and I decided to try something new for dinner since we didnt have the kids. There is a place near us that is called. DD Peckers. (mottos are "every chick needs a pecker" and "theres always something up with Peckers") Not a place I would normally go to...We went in, and it was dark, nasty bar feeling. Needless to say, the food was dripping in grease and well, I didnt have to worry about the calories, cause the food was assuredly not going to stay with you long. lol...
Sunday, we got the boys back, and from the moment they got in the car...The whining began...I said awww, its a special priviledge they save for us...lol...oh, How i missed the noise. The quiet could drive a sane person crazy.
I dont know what is up with my body. I get scared. Last night, I started bleeding again. According to my bc pills Tom isnt due for at least another week and a half. The reason I get scared is, hub and I wanted to have another child. But with my cycles being messed up, coming and going as they will, its hard to track. At my age, my mom had to have a hystorectomy. I dont want to follow the same trend. I know that sounds a bit silly because I am not my mom. But she had a lot of the same things going on with her body. Eh, I guess we will see where things head. Its just frustrating..Sorry had to vent.
I have found over the last several months, that if I plan out the menu, go to the store for only those things on my menu list. It makes it so much easier not to stray, and we save money. I lay out the calendar and plan the meals, then coordinate what we need, and go to the store from there. If i only have what I need, I cant veer too much from the path of eating right. I didnt realize how much extra stuff we were buying until I put my menus into place. Oh, the mismatch items in the cupboard. lol.
I hope we all drop some pounds this week...keep our heads up and keep smiling.
Hiya my fellow fluffies...(oh, dont be offended...shh and just read) I have changed the name of my blog again, to...While I breathe, I hope. It is the south carolina state motto (but in latin) dum spiro spero... LOL..and as I typed spero..i accidentally hit the M and made the word sperm. That so would not have been good.
I was thinking...How appropriate while I breathe, I hope is. Well, we are all breathing and we are all hoping. My husband decided he wanted to go to a buffet when he got home from work. I did well...I maintained..and for every bite I had..I fed my 2 year old trash compactor son, Dechlan 1 or 2 bites...Make him fat.. hes got years to burn it off...SO KIDDING! I put on a new pair of jeans, and a top that hadnt fit in awhile...I was afraid of having a "muffin top" but i turned to look in the mirror...I felt pretty. I felt sexy. And THAT is unusual. I stared at myself even longer. I came downstairs and my husband said...WOW you have lost a lot of weight. I seriously felt like I was floating on clouds.
So new title to my blog...in case you didnt notice. I am watching lifetime tv (i absolutely HATE that channel) and the show is called "Life without a side" or something like that...Basic thought to it is a woman has cancer..and her friend is very structured, does things expected of her, etc. The lady with cancer tells her friend over lunch one day that her cancer has returned, and proceeds to order dessert first, then a big fat unhealthy meal. Her friend tries to order salad with dressing on the side, etc. The lady with cancer tells her to LIVE LIFE WITHOUT THE SIDES. Make the most of life, enjoy. No, I am not saying give into that big burger. I am saying we must live, and enjoy life. Take it day to day, life is short.
I havent posted the last couple of days, I have been having trouble with my 3 year old..YES, PEYTON! I dont know what has come over him, hes defiant, screams at the top of his lungs any time someone comes near, slaps, just very aggressive. No, hes not a bad kid...I swear...I just think its his age, and hes testing limits..Granted, his little brother loves to antagonize him into that shrill scream that only small animals and wilderbeast can hear. I love my son. I just feel like a horrible mom for telling him no most of the day, or making him stand in the corner, etc. I cry because it hurts my heart, I wonder what I have done. Its like nothing phases him. He will fold his arms and blatantly ignore you. At this point, I dont think military schools take 3 year olds. I just dont know what else to do about his attitude. People say, pick your battles but lately..its all battles and theres none to pick, hes going to engage you in one whether you choose to or not. Ideas are welcome...(and yes, we have even tried to spank)
Sorry about my long rant...I just needed to get that off my chest. I hope you all are having a wonderful week..
Something Tatumsmom said made me think...She used the word renewing...Wouldnt it be so nice if there were a place where we could just walk in, stand in line for hours, and just renew ourselves? Body, mind, spirit.. Just like the DMV... Although minus the snotty attitudes and huge fees they usually charge.
I am seeing on so many posts that we are all committing ourselves, and working hard to be the best us we can be. Whether it be 1 lb or 100 lbs, Its a struggle. Something must be worth it or we wouldnt be working for it. Think of what that something is.
People ask me, how do I keep my sense of humor...Well, the simple answer to that is...whats the other option, feel bad about myself, and get down in the dumps? Yea, So not me...yes there are times I am down..by no means am I perfect. But I just cant wallow in it...Laughter is good for the soul. So I do it, and I try to make others smile and laugh. You never know when that one smile could bring about a change in someones day.
Hiya, Its been a busy last couple of days. My aunt came into town and of course the boys and I got spoiled. How awesome is that. I got new clothes, in smaller sizes. Woohooo!
I had been having pain, and blood in my urine, went to the dr today. Dr said while she sees no real evidence of UTI, shes treating me for one, to rule it out. Her real thought on the problem is Kidney stone. She said the pain comes when the stone moves? Whatever it is...hurts like a (insert words i cant say) If UTI, it goes away with antibiotic treatment, if i still have pain after the medicine, I am to come back and we investigate further. I also went to the dermatologist today. He took off 2 moles. 1 mole he said had cancerous tendancies, and its out for biopsy. The mole removed from near my mouth, has me about drooling on myself because my lips are numb. I cant feel it. lol...oh and to top it off...I am a 30 year old with acne and roscea...I mean how much better can my day be? lol...but on the upside..I am feeling good. I stepped on the scale and it said 215. I havent seen that number since I came out the birth canal. And Im excited.
With my new medication changes, I have been waking up rested. I got up this morning and did Walk away the pounds, 1 mile session. Of course, kids started screaming, so I was content with that. After the kids had their lunch, I put them on the sofa and made them have quiet time (they no longer want to nap) Quiet time for mama turned into me doing the 2 mile session of the dvd. So wooohoooo that is 3 miles today. I was really excited. I felt accomplished.
As I was doing the video, my sons were copying me, hand movements, legs...lol..God bless them. Make me want to slap um they are so cute. (in our family and some friends) we express love with violence..not actual violence but saying things like, aww shes so sweet I wanted to drop kick her...or awww I could smack them piss out of them for being so cute. Yea dont ask..
I hope you all have a terrific day..I am motivated to get out and do things.
Ok, so I took the advice of you ladies and got a liter bottle. I have had 3 today...which by their calculations is the same as 12 cups of water. I am floating!!! I dont think the Titanic sunk in as much water as I produced today.
A family member inspired me to write a little something about this...Depression and Abuse. They are both evil but combine the 2 and you have a time bomb waiting to happen. So many of us become overwhelmed with certain aspects of our lives, that we can easily slip into depression. Finances, relationships, jobs all add to it..and there comes a breaking point. Once you hit that breaking point, it then becomes dangerous. Add abuse to the breaking point, and you have a fine line for someone ready to snap. Abuse doesnt always have to be physical...it can be mental and emotional...which take way longer to recover from. There are so many people tetering on the edge and all it takes is just a breeze to push them over.
I think we have to be careful in the way we talk to others, no I am not saying...treat people with kid gloves..but I am saying...maybe think before words come out. You never know what kind of day a person is having, and you could be the breaking point. Life is short, and we need to live to the fullest...like we would want. And if you know someone who is suffering from depression, take a moment to send them a note, email, give them a ring, just to let them know they are not alone, and that someone cares.
Sorry this blog was so heavy but its on my heart. And for those that think I am a flake...you should have stopped reading my blogs long time ago.
Peytonism: Tom is visiting, and of course with a 2 and 3 year old..you never go to the bathroom alone anymore. Well my son being potty trained..went potty a bit later, and ran out the bathroom....Momma I want this diaper...*flings a maxi pad at me. I had to explain those are mommy diapers. The end. Good old peyton.
I was sitting here thinking about my struggle with losing weight, and my fellow EPers. And I realized that we all were hoping or longing for something. I then went to my trusty dictionary and looked up hope.
Hope: 1. to cherish a desire with anticipation. 2. to desire with expectation of obtainment. 3. to expect with confidence.
It is often hard to maintain "hope" when you hit rough patches, highs, lows, nay-sayers. But I think once we realize the things we are longing for are worth the push, grief, and added stress, it seems the heartache dulls or disappears. When we see others achieve the things we want, its like a kick in the gut. Happy for them, YES....sad for us, YES....give up hope...NEVER.
The things we yearn for dont necessarily have to be for weight loss, it could be for a child, a job, or a friend who understands. Its one of the things that bonds us all together, we all have hope for something.
My hopes....to be a great wife, mother, friend. To lose weight and feel good in my own skin. To raise my boys to respect others. To feel a sense of accomplishment every day. To find satisfaction in myself and not in what others think of me.
