Where shall i begin this? The last couple days have been filled with mixed emotions...Hub got me a puppy for our anniversary. Well that dog turned out to be pit bull. So we declined and somehow managed to get an 8 week old lab. While I love the dog, I love my children more. So far the kids are terrified of him, only because he jumps, lunges and nips at their faces. And that scares the bajeezs out of me. I know its typical puppy behavior. But the kids BEG for us to put him in the cage. And its not fair to the dog to be left there. So Im torn. I just dont know what to do. Hub says give it a couple months, and the kids will adjust. But at what cost? Will they forever fear dogs? Will he actually nip to the point of hurting? I just dont know.
I go to the weight dr on Friday now. I am excited. For all nosy purposes, I have stepped on scales and it says I am 4-5 lbs away from 200. I hope I reach 200 by Friday. I am so stinkin excited. I am still excited for what I have lost.
So today is just another one of those mom days. Grumpy kids, 1 puking...the list could go on. I am so excited my Anniversary is on the 16th..and this is the smallest I have been in awhile. We arent doing anything for our anniversary....the finances arent there until later...but hey...as long as we have each other..thats all we need. I am excited beyond means, I have a job interview on Friday. I cant wait...I love being at home with my boys, but I need the adult interaction. I also have my follow up drs appt on the 20th to see how much I have lost. I cant wait.. This is going to be a big 2 weeks for me..and im ready to hit them head on. I just want to go to the drs and WOW him.
I hope you all have a great week!!! keep smiling and keep your eyes on the goal!!
It has been a busy last couple of days. One of my best friends in high school and I had lost touch when we went to college. Well, we found each other again. She has a 2 1/2 year old and a 1 year old. Great ages to play with my boys...so we had a play date. It was so much fun to be with others. Its so amazing how we found each other, just when we both needed a friend.
Ok, for those that arent observant, I posted new pics on my profile. Please do not laugh. I just wanted to show my improvements body wise. I am starting to like who I am becoming. Its been a long time since I have liked myself. The pants in that picture are a size 24 (god bless) and I tried them on the other day, just for jollies..and started to walk, and they fell completely to my hips....bypassed the camel hump that most of you know as a rear. I couldnt believe it. We went to Old Navy the other day...and they had capri's on sale for 3 bucks. The only size they had relatively close to what I am now is a 16. Ya know buy them to give me something to work for. I got home, tried them on...and they fit...they were SNUG..but they fit...now my goal is to get into them and breathe. Its wonderful the little things that can make you feel good.
I hope you all have a terrific week...I miss you. And to Tatumsmom....pssttttt...I need a song of the day. We havent seen one in awhile..I know you are busy...so i will just keep checking. ((hugs))
I think there are so many times in our lives that we tend to become overwhelmed. We tend to over do it, and burn ourselves out. There are so many things we want to put our whole hearts, minds and beings into. Just because we strive for goals in our life, and sometimes come up short. Or pace ourselves. Doesnt mean our hearts have abandoned the cause. Its just a matter of getting the heart, mind, and will power to all one place. A place that is comfy for us, and not on the burn out side. What is right for one, might not be right for another. Its finding the happy median, your happy place, the place where you are at your peak but not ready to tumble down the hill.
After spending 2 days in bed with a migraine, I am much better, and ready to kick butt first...take names later. To my surprise, my husband kept the house intact. Even fed the kids. Even did laundry. Woohooo...I think hes trying to score brownie points lately. lol..
I have been thinking about so many instances in my life where I have been made fun of for being larger, or when you go to the store and the skinny jackass behind the counter stares at you like, why are you buying this? What reminded me of this is...I went out this week and there was someone that was severely obese, and these teens were laughing and snickering. You could seriously see the horror on the mans face.
Empathy: the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, the thoughts, feelings and experiences of another.
My heart was breaking for the man. If only people knew how their actions and words effect others. Why do we as a society place so much emphasis on the outer shell? I know we are all trying to improve ourselves and there is nothing wrong with that. Its when it overflows into pointing, gesturing, and name calling that I have a problem with. I mean none of us are guilt free from the snicker factor but since I began this trip of a new me....I have started to notice the way I treat others, and how others treat me. Maybe we need to have a little more empathy. Like the saying goes...You never know what someone else has been through until you walk a mile in their shoes.
Ok, enough deepness today....Here is a funny...forever, I have noticed I had a HUGE dimple in my butt...yea not really eye appealing. Well, I was in the shower this morning and I felt for the dimple and OMG to my shock, it was just a small dip. I was like holy cow!!!! I was totally amazed that I called NASA and told them I didnt need the Mars Rover now to explore the crater on my butt.
It was an amazingly quiet weekend. My mom had both the kids and it was my husbands first weekend off in a long time. My house was TOO quiet. That eerie quiet. I say that I need a break from the kids, but when they are actually gone, I spend the whole time missing them, wondering what they are doing, and wanting those baby hugs!
Friday, my husband and I decided to try something new for dinner since we didnt have the kids. There is a place near us that is called. DD Peckers. (mottos are "every chick needs a pecker" and "theres always something up with Peckers") Not a place I would normally go to...We went in, and it was dark, nasty bar feeling. Needless to say, the food was dripping in grease and well, I didnt have to worry about the calories, cause the food was assuredly not going to stay with you long. lol...
Sunday, we got the boys back, and from the moment they got in the car...The whining began...I said awww, its a special priviledge they save for us...lol...oh, How i missed the noise. The quiet could drive a sane person crazy.
I dont know what is up with my body. I get scared. Last night, I started bleeding again. According to my bc pills Tom isnt due for at least another week and a half. The reason I get scared is, hub and I wanted to have another child. But with my cycles being messed up, coming and going as they will, its hard to track. At my age, my mom had to have a hystorectomy. I dont want to follow the same trend. I know that sounds a bit silly because I am not my mom. But she had a lot of the same things going on with her body. Eh, I guess we will see where things head. Its just frustrating..Sorry had to vent.
I have found over the last several months, that if I plan out the menu, go to the store for only those things on my menu list. It makes it so much easier not to stray, and we save money. I lay out the calendar and plan the meals, then coordinate what we need, and go to the store from there. If i only have what I need, I cant veer too much from the path of eating right. I didnt realize how much extra stuff we were buying until I put my menus into place. Oh, the mismatch items in the cupboard. lol.
I hope we all drop some pounds this week...keep our heads up and keep smiling.
Hiya my fellow fluffies...(oh, dont be offended...shh and just read) I have changed the name of my blog again, to...While I breathe, I hope. It is the south carolina state motto (but in latin) dum spiro spero... LOL..and as I typed spero..i accidentally hit the M and made the word sperm. That so would not have been good.
I was thinking...How appropriate while I breathe, I hope is. Well, we are all breathing and we are all hoping. My husband decided he wanted to go to a buffet when he got home from work. I did well...I maintained..and for every bite I had..I fed my 2 year old trash compactor son, Dechlan 1 or 2 bites...Make him fat.. hes got years to burn it off...SO KIDDING! I put on a new pair of jeans, and a top that hadnt fit in awhile...I was afraid of having a "muffin top" but i turned to look in the mirror...I felt pretty. I felt sexy. And THAT is unusual. I stared at myself even longer. I came downstairs and my husband said...WOW you have lost a lot of weight. I seriously felt like I was floating on clouds.
So new title to my blog...in case you didnt notice. I am watching lifetime tv (i absolutely HATE that channel) and the show is called "Life without a side" or something like that...Basic thought to it is a woman has cancer..and her friend is very structured, does things expected of her, etc. The lady with cancer tells her friend over lunch one day that her cancer has returned, and proceeds to order dessert first, then a big fat unhealthy meal. Her friend tries to order salad with dressing on the side, etc. The lady with cancer tells her to LIVE LIFE WITHOUT THE SIDES. Make the most of life, enjoy. No, I am not saying give into that big burger. I am saying we must live, and enjoy life. Take it day to day, life is short.
I havent posted the last couple of days, I have been having trouble with my 3 year old..YES, PEYTON! I dont know what has come over him, hes defiant, screams at the top of his lungs any time someone comes near, slaps, just very aggressive. No, hes not a bad kid...I swear...I just think its his age, and hes testing limits..Granted, his little brother loves to antagonize him into that shrill scream that only small animals and wilderbeast can hear. I love my son. I just feel like a horrible mom for telling him no most of the day, or making him stand in the corner, etc. I cry because it hurts my heart, I wonder what I have done. Its like nothing phases him. He will fold his arms and blatantly ignore you. At this point, I dont think military schools take 3 year olds. I just dont know what else to do about his attitude. People say, pick your battles but lately..its all battles and theres none to pick, hes going to engage you in one whether you choose to or not. Ideas are welcome...(and yes, we have even tried to spank)
Sorry about my long rant...I just needed to get that off my chest. I hope you all are having a wonderful week..
Something Tatumsmom said made me think...She used the word renewing...Wouldnt it be so nice if there were a place where we could just walk in, stand in line for hours, and just renew ourselves? Body, mind, spirit.. Just like the DMV... Although minus the snotty attitudes and huge fees they usually charge.
I am seeing on so many posts that we are all committing ourselves, and working hard to be the best us we can be. Whether it be 1 lb or 100 lbs, Its a struggle. Something must be worth it or we wouldnt be working for it. Think of what that something is.
People ask me, how do I keep my sense of humor...Well, the simple answer to that is...whats the other option, feel bad about myself, and get down in the dumps? Yea, So not me...yes there are times I am down..by no means am I perfect. But I just cant wallow in it...Laughter is good for the soul. So I do it, and I try to make others smile and laugh. You never know when that one smile could bring about a change in someones day.
Hiya, Its been a busy last couple of days. My aunt came into town and of course the boys and I got spoiled. How awesome is that. I got new clothes, in smaller sizes. Woohooo!
I had been having pain, and blood in my urine, went to the dr today. Dr said while she sees no real evidence of UTI, shes treating me for one, to rule it out. Her real thought on the problem is Kidney stone. She said the pain comes when the stone moves? Whatever it is...hurts like a (insert words i cant say) If UTI, it goes away with antibiotic treatment, if i still have pain after the medicine, I am to come back and we investigate further. I also went to the dermatologist today. He took off 2 moles. 1 mole he said had cancerous tendancies, and its out for biopsy. The mole removed from near my mouth, has me about drooling on myself because my lips are numb. I cant feel it. lol...oh and to top it off...I am a 30 year old with acne and roscea...I mean how much better can my day be? lol...but on the upside..I am feeling good. I stepped on the scale and it said 215. I havent seen that number since I came out the birth canal. And Im excited.
