Day 198

Good heavens, here already? How did it come so quickly? Almost at the end of 200 days...here's what happened today.

Accidental compliment
Today a nurse told me I was very nearly underweight. Oh it was only because she was looking at the wrong section on the BMI chart, but that's not a mistake you make unless someone looks skinny now, is it?

Every Good Girl Deserves Wine
Every Sensible Girl Wants For Nothing
Also - as I was washing up - I had run out of water glasses and had got down to my enormous wine glass so it was time to wash up...as I washed the wine glass I thought of something my aunt said to me whilst Iw as on holiday - after I had completed my 14 hour Odyssey down the Samaria gorge and made the hair-raising trip back over the mountains on a double decker bus she said 'Surely you deserve a glass of wine tonight?' I brushed it off at the time and said 'Yes, I do but I'm not going to' which was me just being a good girl. Today I have had a weird old day of it - I have been privately stressing about something i can't talk to anyone about - which highlights the fact yet again that I really should have someone I can talk to about this stuff in my life, but I don't. Bugger. Never mind - I don't let that stuff get me down these days, I'm quite chipper and looking forward to being back in the normal world again. Ah - I digress - I was talking about 'You deserve a glass of wine' To console myself for a rotten day and a two hour wait in a doctor's surgery I had my second Coke Zero this month (ooh look at me, the rebel!) Mainly because there was no other way of getting a quick caffeine fix - but yeah - as a sneaky treat. And so - holding the wine glass I thought about 'deserving' as a word. I do not 'deserve' anything. I have or I do not have - I am in possession of myself - anything that comes to me is no more or less than me. I will never treat food or alcohol as a reward again - it is what I have when I am hungry. Wine is what I drink with a meal to help digest it or savour the flavours more. An aperitif is a palate cleanser and aid to digesting the food to come - not something to knock back three glasses of to numb me before the procession of chat and food to come. I like food, I am fond of food, I am fascinated by food and the alchemy of flavours - but I do not need to eat everything to know what's going on. I can't wait to learn about eating until I'm satisfied!

Unwanted Compliment
How would you react if someone said this out loud in general as you walked past them in an office?

'Apparently you've lost more than 7 stone? Congratulations! How much have you lost now?'

And she said it in front of other people which I actually thought a bit off, so I blushed and said 'I'd rather not say' and accepted her compliments - but I just didn't like the way she shouted it out. I'll try not to analyse it too much (we are trying to get over that sort of behaviour round these parts), but I did bristle at her slightly because you just don't shout out weights, do you?