Change - everything you are, everything you were your time is now
The line above is from a song called Butterflies and Hurricanes by Muse. I remember listening to it at Glastonbury 3 years ago and knowing that I was on the verge of a huge change.
And so here I am, under 10.5 stone and very close to my goal although my goals are a little all over the place - not sure where or when I am supposed to be where I want to be. The only limit I have is that I need to be out of ketosis by the 2nd August so I can have the general for my wisdom teeth (although I might go back in again straight after the operation. We'll see) I should also start taking the extra vitamins this week to stop the bruising and aid the healing.
It's been a weekend of highs and lows to be honest - I've done a lot of very serious hard thinking about what I am doing and I really think that putting in the work at this stage will reap rewards later. I stayed after class yesterday and had a long chat with my LLC about my potential journey after management. She goes away after next Sunday for 4 weeks so I will be starting management without her unless I make the concerted decision not to do it until I am 9 stone which I think may be a step too far for me, even. So next week we will have the discussion about what it entails and what to do so I will be able to start planning my journey through management (you know what I'm like - it's all about the spreadsheets!) Anyway - the main reason I stayed was to ask her if she thought it wold be okay if I wrote a book about my experience on this diet and she was so supportive. I am really passionate about what's happened to me and how I've got here so anything I can do to share that journey would be great. The intention is to run a really sexy looking blog for the next year to take me through management and 9 months of maintaining and then I'll fel happy to publish. Which I think is a good amount of time and will give me plenty of time to write my history up til now and to do some research into the psychology of it and comfort eating.
This week on The Artist's Way it's all about money and we have to keep a money notebook which I've always been terrified of in the past, but yesterday all I spent was my money on my 2 litres of water to drink during class and £84 on food and flavourings. I might try extra hard to keep it frugal this week - not because I want my notebook to look good, as I'm sure next Saturday it won't (haircut and photoshoot) but I really don't need to spend money to feel good.
I tried on Christian Louboutin heels this weekend, and I wasn't that impressed. I will have to go to his shop I think to get the full experience. Maybe even the one in Paris. Tee hee.
Right - well - I'd better get ready for work - I really need to write up my feelings in more detail - I may well do that later but I got off my arse yesterday and submitted my scripts to the BBC for a radio show. I very nearly almost self-sabotaged myself over it, but a concerted effort meant that I outwitted myself!