8 pounds down since January 1st and I'm so proud of myself! I'm sure that's water weight and maybe some "waste" because of all the water and fiber I've been taking in, but it's still a step in the right direction.

I've made a mind shift this time - I've lost weight lots of times over the past dozen years or so - and I think the "lifestyle" thing is the only thing that can be effective. I've seen how you have to eat as many nutrients as you can for as few calories, you have to eat clean and you have to eat frequently. Exercise doesn't hurt either.

Not sure if the green tea has anything to do with it, but I'll be sticking to my 3+ cups a day for sure.

Feeling good!

So, I got my first chocolate craving in a week or so...just now. Would do anything for Cadbury chocolate. But, luckily the weather's crappy so I'm in my warm cozy house with nothing chocolate except some baking stuff and fancy gourmet hot chocolate chai that I'm saving.  

Anyway, just learned today that if you eat less than 200 calories for breakfast your chances of being obese increase by 4. Crazy! My metabolism must be so screwy.

Find it a bit weird that I'm not going through more withdrawal - gave up nicotine, coffee, energy drinks, booze and junk food all on the same day. Not that I was a big drinker but man I was drinking a big yummy energy drink every evening.

I am guessing that all the water I've been drinking has flushed all that out of my system pretty quickly. Whatever the reason, I feel good.

I did feel hungry this morning before lunch since all I had to eat for breakfast was a bowl of corn bran cereal and a black coffee. Had a yogurt mid-morning, but was still really hungry for lunch. Will have oatmeal and an egg white omelet tomorrow morning. I have some mushrooms and peppers in the fridge. That would be yummy. 

I have my eating under control. Have to get some exercise in everyday - somehow! Anyone have any tips? (2 kids, full time business, not much sleep...)

BUT this year will be different. I only remember a couple years in my life where I was actually not resolving to get in better shape, but I really mean it this year.

I'm back on track with Weight Watchers (sort of) not rejoining again (lifetime member) because it's too hard to get to meetings with my hectic lifestyle, and the online program is so expensive. I lost 30+ pounds on WW before I ever had kids so I can do it again.

I've been doing too much careless eating since I first got pregnant a few years ago. All that being with child, and then breastfeeding - doesn't lend itself well to dieting. Then I figured I'd only be getting pregnant again anyway so "who cares" if I don't get this weight off. I have been feeding my family so much comfort food! Everyday it's been meatloaf and mashed potatoes or ham and scalloped potatoes. I have to cut that out and/or modify those fatty (but so yummy) recipes.

Back on track now and feeling very motivated.

Starting drinking one cup of black coffee a day instead of my usual 6 cups a day with 18% cream and 2 tsp of sugar. That alone probably helped put at least 5 pounds of fat on my ass. Instead of constantly drinking coffee, I've been having a couple cups of green tea.

Also drinking 2+ litres of water a day and eating lots of veggies. Cutting out the high sugar energy drinks and soda, and eating in the middle of the night when I'm up working.

Gotta get back to the gym, or start doing one of my Carmen Electra DVDs a few times a week. I miss exercise.

Well, there ya have it. I'm back at it, but now I must get back to work.

For breakfast today, had some oatmeal with dried blueberries for sweetness, black coffee, and an apple. Yum. ;)

When I was about six or seven years old, my mother brought me with her to her weight loss group meetings and signed me up. I remember I was the "Biggest Loser" one week and I was so proud. Everyone clapped. I got a crown.

I'm not sure that it was a good idea to put a chubby little girl in a weight loss group. I was chubby, yes, but looking back at pictures, I was not even a little "obese". I probably would have grown out of it and went on to live a happy healthy life instead of being obsessed with my weight and my appearance for literally, as long as I can remember.

The sole value I've ever put on myself was on how I looked, which I have never been happy with - ever. I think there was major damage done in my brain back then, and even though I know how silly it is to think some of the crap I think, I really can't help it. 

The first time I stepped on a scale to compete with grown women to see who had lost the most weight that week, I was nowhere close to being old enough to process that properly. The more weight lost, the better! You got a prize! The lower the number you weighed, the better! More prizes! I was a baby for cryin' out loud.

I'm no shrink, but I'm pretty sure that's where my lifelong hatred for my own body started. My whole life, I've hovered about 15 pounds above the healthy weight range for myself. I've binged and purged, I've starved myself, I've gone on crash diets, I've worked out like a maniac, I've tried the old fashioned 'eat healthy and exercise method' (which works the best, btw) and when I fall off the wagon, I fall hard.

I am now the proud mother of two beautiful girls and I do not want them to model my behavior, and I do not want them to share the same attitude towards their bodies as I have towards mine, so I need to change things.

I'm hoping this group can be a good source of support to help me stay on my path towards a healthy weight, a healthy brain towards my body, and a happier overall "me". 

It's on people. Now, I need to find me a bowl of oatmeal for breakfast.