So here I am writing yet one of a billion blogs on the internet about the all-time mystery of life: How the bleep am I gonna lose that extra HOW many pounds now?
It's after Christmas and we're all feeling it- I know. That I-ate-way-too-much-friggin-turkey guilt. Well, I am anyway...
Let's blame it on the magazines, the ads and the tv, on Kim Kardashian or Lindsay Lohan or Skinny Minnie, that bitch next door who manages to keep perfect weight and never gain a size, but walks in the house with a massive bag of K-fry every night. Every teenager like me wants to look like them, and eat like Skinny Minnie and it's ruining our self esteem bla bla. Well, okay, I see your point. But we are kind of ruining our own self esteem. No, not every girl should be a 00 or even a 5-6. Bone structure just doesn't work that way for some of us. But being healthy is what we should be, and I don't have a low self esteem because of the magazines and Lindsay Lohan. I have low self esteem because I eat too much, too often and make bad choices and am showing the results.
I'm not overweight... per se. Well I am... but not that much. Point being, I just keep letting myself slip. Told myself I'd never be over 150...155... 160. Well, now here I am pushing 170 and getting a little pissed off at Skinny Minnie next door. By height standards I shouldn't be pushing much more than 140 and it has recently started getting to me. I try to be healthy then Christmas reared its ugly head....
Did I skip out? Hell no! I dove into that turkey head first and came out covered in gravy. Most people say it's not about what you eat, it's how much you eat, and I think that's my problem. I will not eat enough of something then I'll gorge myself because I'm so hungry and feel sick for an hour or two afterwards.
Well, I'm not exactly sure what writing about it is supposed to do... get the anger out I guess. Talk to anyone around here and they all go off "Oh you're fine you're fine". No. I'm really not. It doesn't matter if you're 10 pounds overweight or 200, actually, it doesn't matter if you're overweight at all. You still have to take care of yourself, right? Right. And I'm not doing that.
I've got to think through a lot and do some research on what foods to eat. I don't want to "diet" I just want to start being healthy rather than eating Michelina's and ramen noodles for every meal.
However in the active department I've got a treat for all of you who want some fun in your cardio workout! I recently discovered Just Dance for the Wii and I gotta say, it's a good time! There is a "Just Sweat" Option too. On the intense program (which is what I've been trying to do) you need 2000 "sweat points" daily. I think it averages to about 3 or 4 songs. I don't know what that equals out in calories but it does make me sweat and it's loads of fun!
I recently read a blog about a lady who was working on her self image (Which means not just her weight but her whole self!) which I thought was really cool, because it isn't just about weight. It's about your personality and how you view life and what you DO with your life. So for this coming New Year I have started a list of things to accomplish this year. I'll have to get back to you guys later with the rest of it, but to start off:
1) Begin a healthier lifestyle. I'm not putting a "Lose 10 pounds" thing. That's cliche and it never works. Lead a healthier lifestyle means eat healthier, work out/excercise more, eat less unhealthy snacks, and of course work towards my goal weight, but we aren't going to put a number on that because numbers are scary and stressful and to be honest, I don't need any of that shit right now.
2) Do at least one FUN activity with a friend per week. I bought skates last winter and roller blades this summer so I've always got some God-awfully terrifying (and yet somehow totally fun...) activity to be doing. I also discovered racquetball (thanks to my darlin') and I found a wall for wall climbing at school (a designated wall climbing area, I didn't just dub a random wall "the wall climbing wall"- don't worry). It would be cool to allot a time to do these things with friends or family, to get us all being active
3) Make use of the school gym that I paid a metric shit-ton of money for in school fees. If I'm paying for it I might as well use it right? 2 times a week (we'll start small. I'm not in total love with the gym yet... plus my Ipod got stolen and I hate being at the gym without my own personal rock out list. Shitty excuses I know...)
4) I'd like to work on my whole self, like in the blog I read before (Called A Merry Life. I haven't read much yet, but she is really great) So, yes, I kind of stole this one from her blog, but I'm telling you about it here so you can't really call it stealing. In A Merry Life she said she wanted to read 52+ books this year. Is it bad if I snag that number from her too? That's a book a week. I love to read and I have so many books on my shelf to read (and my mom is a librarian to boot so I'm always getting more!!!) It's a good goal and if I don't complete it, I'll try again next year.
Well, that's four. For a whole year, it's not all that many a couple are pretty vague but I'm happy with it for now. We'll see how it goes. It means getting more organized- luckily I bought myself an organizer today. Now all I gotta do is use it. Hmm.
Well, before I bore you to death, if I haven't already I'll take leave. For all those English teachers and literature-lovers, I apologize for the comma splices. I'll try to do better next time.
And for all those blogger-types, I know it's not quite up to "blog" standards but we'll just say this blog is for those folks who love to read. A lot.
Until next time my fine friends,
CailinLayne
