Reasons Why I Won't Go Back "THERE"
This year is a reunion year for my graduating class, and our high school created an alumni site similar to Classmates for all the alumni to post info and reconnect. Just in the last few weeks, it seems like there has been a barrage of our class signing up...the site is fairly new. I've gotten to communicate with my best friends from high school that I haven't had contact with in years, and then catch up with other classmates that I hadn't seen since our 10 year. reunion. Just about everyone had a profile pic, and one of the guys I was emailling with asked why I didn't. I used the excuse that not having a family, I just don't have that many pictures taken of me. Honestly, the ones that have been taken of me lately were either when I wasn't expecting it, or my hair or makeup was a mess, and I just didn't want for that to be the picture that everyone would remember me by!
So...having had a "good hair" day on Monday, when I got home from work Monday night, I grabbed the tripod from an old SLR film camera I had, and attached my digital camera, and read up on how to use the self-timer. I snapped a couple of pictures, and my stomach churned as I debated whether I really wanted to post a picture at all. While I was debating whether to upload the picture or not, I went back to some of my "fat" pictures. These are pictures that I previously refused to post here on EP, but really show where I have come from! And these are the reasons why that I CAN NEVER let myself go "there" again!
I cried when I saw the difference. How did I care so little for myself that I let myself get that way? My hair and lack of makeup only made it worse! When I compared those pictures to the picture I had just taken, I realized how far I had come, even though I still have a long ways to go! I uploaded the profile picture. I was glad I did...my classmates...including some "hottie" guys from high school...couldn't believe my "new" picture was me! Not that I needed their affirmation, but it felt good! I do feel so much more confident, and am proud that my double/triple chin(s) are almost gone! I sent the 3 pictures to my oldest sister(beside me in both pictures), and this was her response:
Saturday, I did my 9 miles in my mile building toward my half marathon the end of April. I was able to walk/jog through my first 5 miles with my first mile being under 14:00 avg. pace, and the others being in the 14:00-15:00 avg pace range. This Saturday, I will be doing the Valentines 5K with Tatumsmom, so that will be fun, and a way to challenge myself jogging/running for longer periods!