Ups and downs

Well, I haven't been on here in a long time, but I'm glad to be back.  Lost a few lbs. gained a few pounds and when I forced myself to go to weigh-in tonight...it was a wash.  Still at 222 lbs.   I started to feel bummed out, wondering what I was doing there, why was I wasting the time and money.  Then I had a light bulb moment   So I haven't lost as quickly as I had hoped but the fact is that snce I started WW I have LOST and I know if I didn't do this heck I may have even gained more weight by now.  So I'll just have to give myself a pat on the back and say GOOD JOB SO FAR...now keep moving forward!  

Keep Moving Forward

Well, enough feeling sorry for myself.  Things are looking up, I talked the judge into excusing me from jury-duty.  The clinic would only pay for 10 days of jury duty and the case is set to go on for another 4 weeks...  Hello, I have to pay the bills!  Anyway, that's behind me know and along with getting back on track with WW (and I'm determined to make it back to meetings) I've also joined a Biggest Loser contest at work.  There are also so many positive people here on EP that really are encouraging.  It's so good to hear that we all struggle but those who keep moving forward LOSE THE WEIGHT!  Someitmes it's only a pound or two, but sticking with it pays off in the long run.  I added some pics to my blog to remind myself of the things I look forward to when I shed the pounds!

No W/I tonight!

Once again, unable to W/I at meeting!  This Jury duty has gotten to be much more  than an inconvenience and with no end in sight, is making me totally lose focus on goals!  I admit, it's obvious that I eat MORE when I'm stressed!!!  Having  to be involved in this case which may go on for a MONTH OR MORE, and having my employer only pay for 10 days of it is scary.  After that, the jury pay is only $30 per day...good lord that won't even pay for my daycare, let alone the monthly bills that need to get paid!  Once I escape from the court house and dash to pick up kids, it's too late for W/I and it's SO ANNOYING!   I feel like all I'm doing it paying monthly dues and not getting anywhere!  The scale tells me how important the W/I and meetings are......I don't go, I don't lose!   Simple as that!  On my own, I just feel like I'm falling back to that same old pattern of losing ground (what little I've managed to eek out) and there I am back to square one again!   NO WAY!!!!!!!!     I just can't stand to be there again!

Monday Weigh-In

Late getting out of work, so I dashed to WW for a quick WI before picking kids up from daycare.  Down 1.8 lbs. this week.  OK, but not what I had hoped for coming up on my one month on WW program.  Was really hoping for a 10 lb. loss in a month (instead of 7.6 lbs.)  I did go out for Mexican at lunch ( I know, wht fool does that on weigh-in day!?!?!?)   The chances to get out for lunch are so far & few between though, that I couldn't resist.  Anyhoo, I guess I can't beat myself up over a few lbs.  I have to keep in mind that I'M ACTUALLY LOSING WEIGHT!!!  If I didn't join WW I wouldn't have lost anything this month, and at the rate I was going I probably would have even gained more weight.  So I'm heading in the right direction.  Now to get going on some exercise, and NOT letting myself off the hook when it comes to tracking my points.  It's so busy at work during the day and crazy at night with the kids, but if I don't track I can't tell how I'm REALLY doing ( keeping track of the good food choices and learning from the poor choices!)  I just keep telling myself that these SMALL changes will add up ti BIG things!  Even 7.5 lbs. per month would add up to 90 POUNDS GONE by this time next year, and that would be pretty AMAZING!!!! 

Coasting...

After 5.4# loss last week, this week wasn't so great, but I did manage to stay the same.  I think after a crazy busy schedule of moving to our new clinic building and going to a dinner party I should be happy I didn't GAIN any! 

This week I will have to get back to eating my veggies and drinking my water.  I will have a better W/I at WW next Mon. night!  Have to go fill out paperwork for possible Jury Duty...Oh brother, could there be any crazier time for this!?!?  First day in new clinic today, Doc just back from conference, coworker out on maternity leave and I'm I might have to serve Jury duty!?!  WHATEVER!

Love being a LOSER!

My first weekly weigh-in tonight at WW.  I feared the worst (since TOM showed up on Wed. what a way to start off the program)  but still I knew I ate well, didn't over do it, and made healthy choices.  I was just hoping for a loss even if it was half a  pound.  I got on the scale....I LOST 5.4 lbs this week!!!      I felt like a million bucks!  I'm not expecting this every week, but boy I never though being a loser would feel so wonderful!!!

NEW GAME PLAN

It's a whole new gig, I started Weight Watchers tonight!  My first major goal will be a 10% loss, that will mean 23 lbs and I know I will have to work for it!!!  I was a little reluctant, thought I might run into people I knew.  Sure enough, a girl from my high school days than I never did like, but then I thought WHO CARES, it's not like it's a secret that I'M FAT!   Besides, obviously she feels the need to shed a few herslf or she wouldn't be there! 

Also found a cute CD online, Skinny Songs- it's available on iTunes and a few other sites too.  It's kind of cory and way funny, but the songs like "Thin", "Skinny Jeans", and "You da Boss" are motivational and keep me upbeat while I'm fighing the fat!

The WEIGHT isn't LOW but I am

Another gain.  So now what!? 

Ok, just chalk this week up to INSANITY and get myself to the store for some groceries for the upcoming week.  Some beautiful, helthy, fresh, feel-good veggies and fruits to stock the fridge.  Tomorrow a new week,  a fresh start, a brand new chance to make healthy choices! 

MEAN OLD SCALE!!!!!!!!!!!

  Oh yes, I did make some bad food choices, so I guess the scale can't take ALL the blame.  I did manage to get some exercise though so I'm proud of myself for that.  I'm having a hard time seeing the light at the end of the tunnel...it just seems like I keep messing with the same few lbs. lose and gain, lose and gain.  I can't even get out of the damn station, so how could I see the light at the end of the tunnel!!!  I know I need to keep trying, but man this is getting OLD!

Happy Birthday to ME

Well 36 doesn't feel nearly as bad as I thought it would.  I think the last few years I've gained a lot of weigh by making poor food choices and not making time for exercise.  This year will be different.  I think of myself as a kind person, someone who is encouraging to others...so why should I treat myself any different?????  I know that there are lots of women out there that are real go-getters, taking care of their family, putting in 110% at work, always offering a good shoulder to their friends, and then they have nothing left for themselves.  I think it's great to give of yourself, but we all need to remember to take the time to refuel our own tank!  So my present to myself this year will be to nicer to myself,  to make time to get some  exercise, encourage myself to make better food choices and celebrate the small victories...one pound lost, one walk, one "no-thank you" to that cupcake at work.    Thanks to the gals who post such encouraging words, especially my sis...thanks for being such a great cheerleader!