small steps...

i'm back!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009 00:08:19

so much has changed since i've been here...

aiden is 5 months old!
i have a new job - i had 2 weeks left in my maternity leave and i was let go - RIF... luckily i found a new job and i'm now the center manager of the early head start in a neighboring town.
i've gained ALL my weight back

so that is why i'm here - and i know i need to get it off! i'm glad that i'm finally back to work - so i can get into a routine. get myself back to the gym and hopefully stop my mindful snacking!

sweets and chocolate have been my downfall - i have always had a sweet tooth - but when i was pregnant with aiden - it went NUTS! and i still have it... i just devoured like 1/3 a bag of oreos!!

aiden is napping - when he wakes up we'll have some errands to run... tomorrow after work - i'll pick aiden up from day care and then we'll go to the gym and he'll spend some time with the kids there while i work out.

i'm only going to be able to do that 2 days during the week - since i don't work in town and i have to travel - on days when i go to the gym i won't get much time with aiden - but i know its whats the best for me and in turn for aiden - so he has a wonderful healthy mommy!

i'm excited to get back up with all of you!

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news!

Saturday, December 6, 2008 22:02:22

well - we are pregnant! happened a month sooner than we were wanting - were trying to plan it for the end of the school year....

anyways here's my vent - i just didn't know where to go with this

my sister and niece were visiting from NY and my sister is 19 years older than me.... and she is totally acting like my mom... and we got into a big fight because i didn't want her to take my picture in my bathing suit - i told her no - and she did it anyways... i'm sorry - but that is just showing me that she doesn't respect my wishes... and when i told her that she said "that's right amy, i don't respect you." (and make sure you say that with a lot of sarcasim)

i didn't want my picture taken in a bathing suit - because i'm still not totally comfortable with my weight.... it's been a long road - i lost 50 lbs and when we moved to georgia i put 20 back on..... i was really hoping to get to my goal weight before getting pregnant - but it didn't happen - and you know what... i'm okay with that. because i will get to my goal weight.... after baby!

she told me - you're never going to be happy with your weight (i told her yes i am) she told me that i'm never going to get to my goal (i told her yes i am) she told me that i'm going to be up and down just like every other woman in my family (i told her no i'm not) what a way for an older sister to be supportive - huh?

she asked me if i wasn't going to allow people to take my picture while i'm pregnant.... i told her of course they can take my picture - but i'll be in clothes - not a bathing suit...

i still can't believe that she did that.... i told her no and she still did

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happy may

Thursday, December 4, 2008 23:01:02

i don't know why i am so self destructive on myself in my weight loss journey... i really need to get these 10 pounds off.... and then my additional 30 pounds to finish my goal!

i had a good talk with my friend jennifer yesterday - we were discussing weight loss issues. and i think i've figured out some of my problem areas:

*not preparing well for lunch at school

*eating out WAY TOO MUCH!

*not getting to the gym everyday like i did in NC

*being too social with food - need to be social without food

*stopping weight watchers

*stress, stress, stress!

I know that these are all things that i can fix... and i'm hoping now with the school year coming to an end that i can do that. i am going to teach summer school - but i have a very good feeling about this - that i won't be so stressed...

DH is improving in his weight loss - he's doing great and i know that this will help me...

i miss everyone on EP - i need to get myself back into the game - back to myself...

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ahhh - stress

Wednesday, December 3, 2008 22:02:04

i really don't understand myself sometimes....

i know i am stress eating! and i seem to keep myself from it. i need to figure something out - what i can do to stop it. i'm back up to 190 pounds... so i'm 15 - 20 pounds heavier than i was when we moved here - that is A LOT! and my pants are totally tight and i busted a black button down shirt last thursday.

i'm not going to the gym like i need to. i don't have much time with DH with our crazy work schedules... so i HATE being at the gym when i could be spending time with him!

okay i need to get to bed! 'night ya'll!!

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getting my head back in the game

Thursday, December 4, 2008 00:01:04

i don't know what my problem is....

where my motivation has gone....

i need to find it - FAST!

i need to stop eating chocolate... that is my biggest thing right now.. and i have it in my classroom (because -unfortunately- that seems to be the only thing that is working to help keep my students in line)

i need to eat more veggies.... i haven't had a salad in a long time - mostly because it hasn't been appealing to me... i need to spend the money to get the items i need to make more salad meals for dinner (which chicken!)

i need to keep going to the gym on a consistant basis.... the gym has been hit or miss ever since i've been here in georgia. and i don't really know why... i used to LOVE going to the gym in north carolina.

my weight hasn't been too bad.... i've been within 10 pounds of where i was when i moved.... which isn't good - but it isn't horrible either.

my pants are fitting tight though.... and some of my shirts are too - and i do not like that - AT ALL!

i'm watching TBL right now and michelle just made a comment that made total sense.... about BALANCE.... i think that is my trouble - i don't know how to balance everything... how and when do i do that? balance home, work, gym, friends, my husband.... i don't know

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back to attack!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008 00:03:04

well after an off week... in everything! school - gym - health! i'm finally feeling MUCH better... i was sent home thursday from school for getting sick! i was back to work friday... but anyways - i got enough sleep over the weekend and today i have felt the best i have in about 2 weeks!

i totally did not want to go to the gym today - but i did - and did BodyAttack and BodyPump! i upped my weight in Pump - for a couple tracks - squats, back, and triceps and i TOTALLY feel it... which means i will TOTALLy feel it tomorrow!

i missed my weigh in saturday... i'll get it this saturday. i think i'm doing okay. we'll find out saturday.

in other news... our new puppy... he's kinda driving me up the wall... so we had a baby play-pen for our other dog - rocky - for when we left him home alone... and we pulled it out again for ecko. well adam put him in when he left for work at 6:30 - and i got home at 8:30 and well he was out! HE CHEWED A HOLE IN THE SIDE! i guess thats why dog cages are metal... they are just so cold i don't like them. UGH! there is one big hole and 2 smaller ones. rocky never did anything like this!

oh - and there is a slight chance for snow showers - so the PJ's are on inside out (an old wives tale from college up in PA!) here's to hopping it works!

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HUMP DAY!

Sunday, November 30, 2008 22:09:03

i finally got back to the gym today... BodyPump! and i feel so much better. i'm still feeling a little crappy - but not as bad as i was monday.

i had all intention of going to the gym yesterday.. i called my sister on my way - and i find out her boyfriend of 3 years just left on friday... i'm driving to the gym - and we are still talking about what happened - or well she is speculating - and i couldn't say "oh my class is about to start... i gotta go." we talked for over an hour. i still can't believe it. so i didn't quite make it.

so i have RPM tomorrow... and BodyPump and BodyStep on saturday... i'm gong to miss friday again - because i'm working for the catering company again friday - right after school until about 10 - 10:30. at least it's active work!

ecko is doing okay... he's chewing on everything... i need to go get some more chew toys for him. he's also having more accidents in the house oh well - we'll get it! i let him sleep with me monday and tuesday night... i told DH though that tonight he's going to sleep in his crate.... rocky had to do it when he was little - so he has to do it too! i know tonight he's going to be whining like crazy... i just hope i can tune him out!

okay we're watching the last templar... DVR'd it so we could watch it together.

enjoy the rest of your week

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i feel like CRAP!

Sunday, November 30, 2008 22:07:00

ugh - i am not making it to the gym today... i fear i'm coming down with something and i pray it is not strep or anything like that... my throat is really bothering me and it hurts when i cough and i feel like i'm getting an ear ache (from my throat no doubt). i'm a BIG BABY when i get sick! all i want is my mommy... and to stay in bed!

i'm eating okay... not too bad

ecko (the new puppy) is doing okay - he is very playful! rocky doesn't really know what to do... he's kinda scared of him - rocky just kinda runs away from ecko. they kinda played a little this morning first thing. it's really cute! he whined a lot last night - i hope tonight isn't as bad.

okay i need to go off and read some blogs... i NEED some motivation! i hope everyone has a great week!

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a quickie

Sunday, November 30, 2008 22:05:16

i finally have time to sit down and relax!

lets see - thursday i got up early and went to the gym at 5am! mainly because i missed the gym on wed. and was not going to be able to go thurs. thurs. after school i had to get changed and then headed over to the forum - to work a banquet. a coworker/friend of mine works part time for a catering company - so i thought i would give it a shot! i had a good time... i was there until 12:15am - friday i was exhausted! so no gym friday after school.... saturday i woke up and headed to the gym for all the les mills launches of new programs! so i was there for 3 hours! for BodyPump, BodyStep, and BodyFlow... saturday adam's brother will came over and they went "shopping" for a sound system to put in his car... then we just kind of hung out.

and then later we went to check out a puppy - and we came home with a new puppy!

so there is ecko! because he looks like and echo of rocky! he's a fox terrier, chihuahua, and min. pincher mix! he's 8 weeks old and SUPER cute! rocky doesn't quite know what to do... but i know he'll be happy to have a playmate :)

i hope everyone enjoys the rest of their weekend! i'll be back later tonight!

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what have you done today to make you feel proud?

Sunday, November 30, 2008 22:01:03

i'm watching the biggest loser!

so what did i do? i made it to the gym! i was *this close* to not going... school kinda wore me out today - it was mad scientist day so it was just a wierd day... so i left right at 3:30... i came up with all intentions of going to the gym for RPM class at 5:30... but i didn't feel like it - my body wasn't ready to get back on the bike after being on yesterday (even though it was only 15 min.) so then i thought - i just won't go... and DH wasn't any help - he told me he would like me to stay home...(normally he isn't like that - he won't let me quit - but with his job now and working nights... we don't see each other that much during the week - so it's hard to leave him.) and then i said to myself - you need to go! you need to work out - you need to get your activity - you need this for yourself! so i got dressed and decided that i was going to go to the 6:30 BodyCombat class... so i still got a little extra time with DH - we watched 3 of our monday night shows on the DVR - and i was falling asleep... i almost didn't go to the gym... but i repeated everything i said to myself earlier again.... and i got up and left at 6:00 for the gym!

i got an AWESOME workout in! (i WISH that was me! haha)

okay i need to go... at least this post was more on topic - unlike my last 2... i know they weren't what ya'll needed to read - but this is my place to vent...

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