Back when i started this long journey in January of 2006 I really wasn't too into it. However, after a couple of weeks of success, inspiration bloomed inside me and stayed with me until recently. All I had to see was that my goals were attainable. That was enough to keep me going.
Now, after months and months of no progress, my inspiration has completely left me, replaced by a gnawing fear that I'm going to lose everything I've worked for. I've already lost my fitness level after not being able to exercise. Now the pounds are coming back on and I don't seem to be able to stop it.
I'm honestly stumped in the food department. I never stopped following my diet. I maintained my weight for six months, but couldn't seem to lose. I tried a couple of more extreme diets, but the results were only temporary. I can seem to lose water, but not fat. Then I went on vacation and gained what it took me six months to lose last year. It took only two weeks to put me back where I was in October.
Not only that, but I've put the weight on in one spot only--my belly, so my pants size has gone up to what it was when I weighed ten pounds more. I can't tell you how discouraging that is. My workout clothes that I bought last summer are snug. I have nothing I can wear, but I will be DAMNED if I will spend money on new pants in a bigger size. For some reason, I never had jeans in this size.
I've started working out with weights again, but it's really slow going. I am SO weak and I have to be so careful not to injure myself, so really can't throw myself in wholeheartedly. I'm exercising every day and changing it all up for variety. However, I just can't do the amount of exercise I feel I need to get the weight off just yet.
Food is where I'm most discouraged. I just don't know what to do other than go on a seriously restricted low calorie diet, but I don't know if I CAN. For so long, I was successful without starving myself. I don't want to live like that--not ever--but I don't know what else to do. Eating a balanced whole-foods, all-natural diet of 1400 calories a day just isn't working anymore. I'm sure it benefits my overall health, but it's not enabling me to lose weight, and I need to lose probably 25 more pounds to be in the healthy weight range.
I've accumulated so much knowledge, but none of it seems to be something I can fall back on. I'm sure if I went back on Jenny Craig I might drop a few pounds, but I don't want to go back to eating a diet of processed foods after switching to the whole-foods diet.
All I know is that I desperately want back what I used to have. I'm not asking for a miracle, I just want the scale to start moving slowly back down. Any consistent progress would be acceptable. I just want to think that this is POSSIBLE, because right now, it just doesn't appear to be. Nothing I do reinforces any positive direction. Working hard only maintains.
Is a tiny bit of encouragement too much to ask?
Posted By: ashleyb
Comments to this post:
06/25/2007 19:38
don't give up the food
Your dinners always sound so appetizing and also healthy. I can't imagine that a more restrictive diet would help much, and it wouldn't be livable. At this point, slow progress at the gym has got to be the answer.
I feel like I'm right where you are. I don't want to restrict like I was, and not having the BF pressure of being restricted, I feel food relief and i'm eating it as such. Also, my meds are wacky because I weight more now :( Apparently, all I had to do was gain a few to get my body to adjust the meds away and now I wish I had that "aversion/perversion" issue again. I maintained forever, it seemed, and very quickly started gaining at some point, the point where I was sick for several weeks. so now what?
I'm terrified at the way I look right now. I scare myself. Nothing fits. I feel fat, and everything I own makes me look pregnant. I have cute shirts, but they are baby doll shirts and with the added pounds, I look pregnant.
I'm in favor of pushing yourself slightly beyond your limits in the gym to challenge your body to kick it up a notch. Even short bursts of ooomph should do it. I am weak now, too, not having done much exercise since november. I've been wearing my pedometer on and off, and Rick was in NYC last week, and he wore his, too. although, his return through the airport was goofy because the security thought it was a lighter. duh. gave him a hard time.
i'm feeling a bit overwhelmed with seven lovely animals, but am also feeling like I need motivation. I, too, want to run up a mountain and know my body is "fit" enough to do so. I feel so blah lately that it's hard to get that "get-up-and-go" mentality back.
BUT I'm going to keep trying and try to focus on counting WW points. That always seemed to give me a motivating focus.
Girl - I love the new photos! The one on the front page looks just like the overlooks at Petit Jean Mountain in AR! It seems hard to believe you are "medically" still overweight because you look very fit and healthy, espcially in the yoga overlook photo! You look beautiful girl!!!
While I don't have the same problems with not being able to lose on a program that once upon a time worked, the lack of motivation in my neck of the woods is staggering.
I too am out of the workout loop in a bad way. Most mornings I find myself wondering just how in the hell I did this and why am I so friggen tired.
I wish I had words of encouragement, but I do have understanding... And if I figure it out I'll let you know... esp if you agree to do the same!
You could try and cut your calories by 200 to 1200, which is what JC would have you on anyway, but do it by eating whole foods. Then try and step up the intensity of your exercise by running the treadmill. This type of shake up may be the trick!! :o)
