So, today is Thursday and the first day in weeks that I'm not pulling an all nighter to work on research projects. I'm pretty sure that I lost weight during undergrad, stayed fit and gained a few pounds in graduate school but nothing to write home about; however, my doctorate program has been a different story. Today has been a silent celebration of no homework. YAY! Unfortunately I ate like it was a celebration day. I did attend golf class which I am going to consider cardio for the day ;) Although I excel in academics and my brain does constant workouts to synthesize research materials, my body does not enjoy as many workouts. I'm not good at being fit and eating healthy, but I know I need to be. I have the worst time with the campus food court. So convenient, yet so greasy, buttery, and sugary. I tried bringing my lunch and it worked for a while but then i would run short on time and just food court it. I know I'm not getting any younger so now is the time to make a difference. I am just feel out of place when I hit the gym like I don't belong with all of those 18% body fat folks. I would like to look like these hotties but I also need to have brain stamina to work on my research and be successful in my job. Can I have it all? Can I tire my body and my mind all while being productive at work, home, and academics? If so, how?
When I started my journey to a fit, slimmer me on July 1 (my most recent attempt), I was excited and motivated, a hottie-to-be on her way. So a month has gone by and the 5lbs I lost in the beginning of the month is still off minus one more. I was hoping for a larger loss :( Now, it's August, it's hot and I recently (last Thursday) hurt my lower back doing something at the gym. Im pretty sure it was from a free form elliptical or the squats with the bar. Anyway, Im trying to let my back heal before I do any strenuous exercise. As for the eating, Im tired of feeling hungry all the time. I've been attempting to strink my stomach all month by drinking lots of water and eating small portions. It's not shrinking fast enough. I crave fried foods and desserts all the time! I have been attempting some healthy recipes for dinners but the food is not getting rave reviews. I actually wanted to throw grilled pork loins at my household food critic today. I am so disappointed in myself for gaining weight in the first place. I don't remember it being difficult to gain the weight, so why is it so hard to lose it?
I have accumulated extra pounds and significant muscle loss since January 2006. I am a former fit girl that sported an athletic body through high school, college, even graduate school. I completed graduate school in December 2005. Initally, I still went to the gym and worked out but as a newly wed, I had more fun trying out my cookbooks then getting fit. Two years ago I took a position with a university that consisted of event planning and long hours. After a 12 hour day, I just didnt want to do anything and I had no time for food so I ate at the events which usually consisted of pizza and hot dogs. On my 8 to 10 hour work days, I just wanted to rest. So, I enter the vicious work, bad food, long hours cycle. After two years of developing two different programs, I couldn't work the hours anymore. I had worked on my doctorate for a year with a course load and heavy work hours, I was just burnt out on everything. So, I resigned and went to part time teaching and full time doctorate student. I have been free from crazy hours since July 1. I have started eating healthier and visiting the gym; however, the weight is falling off so slowly. I know what I can look like, but the road to getting there is a long one. I want to journey the weight loss road correctly but there is so much advice on do's and dont's. I love to cook gourmet food rich with butter and cream, but of course that is not healthy and doesnt need to be on my menu. I find myself being sluggish and sad and craving decadent foods. Im fighting the cravings for now, but I just dont want to cook the healthy stuff. So far, I have lost 5 lbs since July 1. I weighed 175 on July 1 and am down to 170. I am 5'3 so I am far from my ideal weight. It is interesting to me how cutting back food and working out has made me so tired and unhappy. Five pounds shouldnt make that much difference. On an upbeat note, my clothes are fitting better and my legs are getting tighter. There is still multiple levels of waves from my triceps when I wave and I hope for that to improve:) Well, until next time....
