I've stumbled, but I am picking myself back up
Wow. Has it really been over a month since I've posted? I could give the usual excuses -- life's busy, so much going on, blah blah blah. The truth is I didn't want to post because I've been completely off track for the last few weeks and I didn't want to own up to it. How's that for mature? I kept hoping I'd get it together and have something worthwhile to report, but sadly that's not been the case. Today's wakeup call was seeing 115kg on the scale. Now I know part of that is due to my TOM being near, but still …
I don't know the reason for this slip, really. I think part of it is the frustration of not seeing the results I'd hoped. Part of it is worrying about family members a world away that I wish I could be there to help through some difficult times. But really, it doesn't matter why -- everyone slips from time to time, and generally I get a handle on it and get right back on track. Not this time. I've spent the last 3 weeks doing virtually nothing and eating pretty much whatever I felt like. It's been cold, and hubby and I sit around the TV at night watching shows and movies and munching on chips and chocolates. No worries for him, he doesn't gain weight. Me, on the other hand …
So obviously I'm here to own up to it and do whatever I need to in order to get back on track. I had set a goal of eating healthy and exercising for the rest of the year no matter whether I saw results or not, and then I let that goal slip from my grasp. It's not too late.
My birthday is coming up in a week and a half. I'll be 47! That's right, three years 'til 50. How long am I going to wait to reclaim my health? How long am I going to put off getting active and healthy? I'll be spending my birthday in the hospital, unfortunately, having shoulder surgery. I actually contacted a personal trainer recently saying that I needed to make a real commitment to getting in shape, even if it meant spending money on sessions with a personal trainer, but when I mentioned my surgery, recover time and physical therapy, he suggested I wait until that's over to begin a real routine. However, he also said I didn't have to wait to be active -- I could still get out and go walking and do other activities in the mean time. He's right. There's really no excuse not to. I feel sluggish, and I remember a year ago when I was out walking every single day how much better I felt. I want that feeling back again.
So here's to admitting I've faltered and doing whatever I need to do to get back on track. I've still been reading all of your blogs, so I'm taking inspiration from all of you and I hope to be posting positive news again real soon. And I will post no matter what, not only when I've had a good week, so I remain accountable, if only to myself.