So, I finally got up enough courage to go back to Weight Watchers once again! There were no surprises...I knew the damage I had done before I even walked into the doors. But it was still a slap in the face to see the number on the scale. I have yet to get up the courage to update my stats to reflect my correct weight, so for now it will stay the way it is. However, I will post my weekly weight loss after the meetings.
So far Week 1 has been going pretty well. I can't believe how much better I feel after eating healthy for just two days!! It makes a huge difference. I have also changed my work schedule and am now going in later in order for me to get to the gym before work. It seems to be going ok...I like my hours much better, and I like not having that nagging "I need to go to the gym" every night! However, I am going to have to be very disciplined in getting up each morning. I did not get up this morning, but it was mostly because I am still having some problems with my foot and after my foot going numb at the gym yesterday, I thought it would be best if I let it rest for a day.
My goals this week are:
1. Track all food consumed, no matter how good or bad it is!
2. Get in 4 workouts this week (only 2 more left).
3. Drink my water every day.
4. Work on making healthy food choices/plan healthy menus.
I know the only way I am going to tackle this is to take it one step at a time. Therefore, I will be picking a couple goals each week to focus on. It's the weekends that worry me...I can keep things in check during the week, but once the weekend rolls around, I completely lose sight of my focus. I will try my best to make it through this weekend!
So, Saturday Joe & I came down with the flu! It was not fun!!! We were at his sisters to celebrate Christmas with his family. We arrived Friday afternoon, and had a few cocktails with his sister Friday evening...ok, maybe a little more than a few. When we woke up Saturday morning, we both just thought we had a small hang-over...nothing a cup of coffee and some breakfast couldn't cure. Not so much. Joe had to drive 3.5 hours to pick up the girls...luckily his dad insisted that he ride along, as I don't think Joe could have made the trip all on his own! I tried as hard as I could to make it thru Christmas lunch, but after about 3 bites, had to excuse myself and spent the rest of the day in bed! It was horrible. I was relieved when Joe got home and told me he was feeling the same way. We both forced ourselves to make it thru the gift opening. I had to watch the girls open their Coach wallets! So I forced myself to sit there for 30 minutes and smell the nauseating scent of Mulled Wine. Oh, how I wish I was not feeling so terrible, because I'm sure the smell would have been much more pleasant. The girls loved all their gifts...wooohoooo...and I headed straight back to bed. I'm still not feeling 100%, but I feel a million times better than I did on Saturday!
Christmas was great this year (besides the small bout with the flu). I got some new baking things (cupcake stoneware and a Dessert Decorator Pro)! Yippeee. I can't wait to make cupcakes! And, of course, to get rid of the damage the cupcakes cause, a Firm workout set and Jillian Michael's 30-day Shred DVD. Both of which I asked for, by the way! Hopefully by this afternoon, my body will be feeling strong enough to make it through one of the workouts.
I'm having a hard time motivating myself to do much today. After spending 5 days on the road, coming down with the flu, and all the Christmas festivities, I'm feeling kind of blah...and like I just want to lie in bed and watch movies all day. I knew it was a good idea for me to take a day of vacation today! My goal today is to get in a 45 minute workout (at the gym), check out one of the new work-out DVD's, and cook a healthy dinner for tonight. It's the small goals that add up, right?
and I've once again sunk my ship. This year has been a year of very mixed emotions. Lots of struggles, but yet so many great moments. Let's see, the year started out with me moving back home to be with the love of my life. The first half of the year was spent trying to find a job. And then I became a "fiance" and am trying to adjust to this whole fiance/step-mother role I have now acquired. What a long, strange trip it's been.
While there have been many hi-lights of 2008, there have also been plenty of struggles that have hindered my progress. I don't need to discuss...I remember fondly what those memories are. But as I look ahead to 2009, I am excited for all that is to come...getting married to my best friend and starting our family!
With just over eight months until we say "I do", I now now start all over again with my weight loss. I have found myself at square one. Rather than beat myself up over this (which I have already done plenty of mentally), I have decided it would be best to approach my journey one step at a time. Right now the first step would be to get through the next 5 days!!! Five days on the road, celebrating the holidays. I have packed my walking shoes (in case the temp decides to rise above 0 degrees!), and will be drinking plenty of water between bites and sips. I don't anticipate losing any weight over the next 5 days, but I will be satisfied if I can just keep at my current weight.
2009 is going to be my year! I can feel it. And wearing a wedding dress should be the only inspiration I need to get my bubble-butt back on the treadmill once again!
Wow. I guess I've let this whole weight loss thing slip right on by. So much has happened in my life, and I lost the motivation I once had! The whole situation frustrates me. How could I have done so good for so long, lost 60 lbs, and then just let myself go and gain back 40 of those pounds. Well, the good news is Joe and I have been motivating each other lately and we've both been trying to get back into the swing of things.
I never in a hundred years could have imagined that moving back to WI to be with him would lead to so much stress. Stress not caused by him, of course (well, with the exception of his health problems). Stress of not finding a job, worrying about finances, wedding, and all that other stuff that requires money! I imagined life back home would be 100% perfect and we would just carry on with our happy life together. Boy, I couldn't have been more wrong! The good news is I have the support of him and I would never trade being 1100 miles away from him again. Being with him makes it all worth all the struggles I'm facing right now.
But anyway, I'm here to talk about weight loss. I seem to have mastered the art of gaining weight! Now, if only I could figure out the art of will-power and moderation! Sunday Joe and I started the couch to 5K training program. I'll be honest...it sucked!!!! And it depresses me that only a year ago I was running 5 miles on the treadmill on a consistent basis. Now, I can't even run 60 seconds without thinking I'm going to die. Fortunately we are motivating each other to continue with the program and tomorrow we will do workout #3 of the week. I think in a couple weeks things will get a little easier...I just need to give it time for my body to get used to the physical activity again.
I also started Weight Watchers again. Actually, I joined about 5 or 6 weeks ago...made it to maybe half of those meetings...and recorded a gain and every single one. When the scale hit 240 last week I finally said enough is enough. Thank God that Weight Watchers has the new "Monthly Pass" thing or the little money I do have right now would be going towards "joiners fees" every 3-4 weeks! I switched meeting locations on Monday though, and I really like it much better. The leader and helpers are all so nice. The girl weighing me in even showed genuine concern for my weight gain over the last several weigh-ins, and is determined to help me get things under control. The other meeting I was attending the staff could have cared less about me. I'm really glad I switched, and I think the extra attention will really help me get through this.
That's all for now. Hopefully journaling on here, running again, and trying to make it to Weight Watchers weekly will be the kick in the butt I need. I don't want to be a fat bride...I want sexy! Yeah...
Haven't had a whole lot of time to post the past few days. The end of last week was a little bit rough as I stopped for drinks with co-workers a couple times. Well, what else can I say. I made some choices I shouldn't have made, but the best thing is to move on and get over it.
It seems like the harder I try at this whole weight loss thing, the worse my results tend to be. I'm not sure why it has gotten so tough. I seem to lose weight one week, but the next week I've gained it all back and then some. And it's not because I'm not trying. I absolutely am trying!!!!! Yes, sometimes I don't make the best choices, but most of my choices aren't the worst I could make either. I'm so frustrated with this whole thing. I've been stuck in the same rut since December! I don't know what else I can do. I can't deprive myself all the time; I track my points, I get my work-outs in, I make healthly choices, I drink my water. What else do I need to do? I'm at a loss. I'm not expecting the weight to magically disappear, but gradually come off. In fact, my goal was to lose 25 lbs by the summer...a goal that is and should be very attainable. When I set the goal, I had over 5 months. Now, I'm down to less than 4 months. It's still possible, but that means I really have to stay focused.
I don't know if the whole move thing has anything to do with it. I moved here about 5 months ago, so I'm still adjusting to living in a new city 1100 miles away from all my friends and family. It's tough, but I don't want to blame that as the reason for me not being able to lose more weight. If anything, it should be helping to lose the weight as I have all the time in the world to focus on ME! Is anyone else in a 5 month-rut, where they feel their efforts are only sabbotaging their goals? What did you do to get out of this? Someone please help. I need advice! I don't want to see the scale jump over 200lbs yet another time, and I'm afraid that's the road I'm heading down again.
Yesterday was weigh-in day. I went in with mixed emotions. I knew I had lost; it was just a matter of whether or not it was enough for me to feel satisfied. It's just amazing to me how I can easily gain 6 lbs in one week, but yet, I can't lose that same amount. Anyway, I did lose 3.6 pounds. I was happy with the results, especially considering it's also that time of the month for me.
Joe has also been watching his weight (although sometimes I want to question some of his choices, but I make mistakes too, so I have to stop myself). I'm just glad that he is so supportative and understanding of what I'm going through...it makes it so much easier than feeling the need to hide and cover up from him the fact that I go to Weight Watchers meetings every week. He told me the other day that he was also down. Hopefully we will both be down 10 lbs each by the time we get to see each other in April. The challenge has been kind of fun as we both keep each other focused on our goal.
I've been doing well on my weekly goals. 100 crunches every day, which is a miracle for me! I'm also happy because instead of all the normal junk food that is everywhere in my office, there is also an abundance of healthy choices this week. I've been taking advantage of all the yummy fruit that is everywhere. Better snacking on grapes than cake though, right?
I was relatively good yesterday, although a friend and I had a movie-marathon (one really long movie) and we made popcorn. I just cannot eat popcorn without real butter on it for some reason. So, besides the popcorn, I was 100% on plan. But I went running in the afternoon, so it wasn't all entirely bad for me, I guess. I'll admit: the popcorn was really, really good though! I probably shouldn't make that again for avery long time...like maybe, never!
Dinner last night turned out well. I ended up making a beef roast with carrots, mushrooms, potatos and onions. It was good, and healthy as I selected one with barely any fat on and I loaded it with fresh spices and seasonings to give it flavor. The best part of the dinner was the salad...I made a strawberry avocado salad with a honey vingerette. It was so yummy. I could have just eaten a huge salad and skipped the rest of the meal. I will definitely be making that salad again.
Tomorrow starts a new week. My goals for this week are:
1. Increase fruits and vegetable consumption (as I've been lacking in that area lately)
2. Get in my water intake each day.
3. Run a total of 20 miles this week.
4. Do 100 sit-ups every day this week.
Reward for achieving all these goals: pride in knowing I completed something I set out to do!
Time to get to the gym. I told myself I was going to go early this morning, but I've kind of been taking it easy (watching cheesy wedding shows on TLC) and trying to motive myself to get moving. Better go now before the weather starts getting bad. I heard they got a lot of snow back home (Wisconsin). Oh, how I wish I were there right now going sledding and having snow ball fights!
Today could have been much worse, but it could have been better also! I expected it to be a tough day eating as we had a large retirement party for one of my co-workers. Food EVERYWHERE you looked! And it was all soooo good. I made some healthy choices, but I also made some not so healthy ones too (the XL slice of cake with lots-o-frosting)! I guess I should look at it positively though...a year ago I would have been going back for 2 pieces of the cake...today, it was just one! Which brings me to my thought today.
I am often times so critical of myself for messing up, that I cause more harm than good. I get so down on myself for messing up that I end up on a three-week eating binge! But, if I would just take 5 minutes and think about the progress I've made, I'd realize I have come along way and it is senseless to ruin it now. My highest weight was 260 lbs. I weighed that on my 26th birthday. I will be 29 in a couple months. Even though it has taken me almost three years to lose the 65 lbs, I have also managed to keep that off for that long as well. Today, I weigh less than I did two years ago, less than I did a year ago and even less than I did three months ago. Sometimes I need to sit back and remember that and remind myself how hard I worked to get here. I know my weight will always be a struggle with me, but I also knw what I need to do to keep my weight under control. And that doesn't include the bad habits I've let slip into my life over the past month or so.
I have goals I set for myself. Why is it that I can't keep focused on them. I wake up every morning telling saying "Amy, you didn't do so good yesterday. Today is your day!" Some days I do good, somedays not so good. My goal is to do good every day until my weigh-in on Wednesday. Joe and I have a little challenge going. Not a competition because we want to encourage each other to lose weight, and not see who can do it better! We won't see each other for another 6 weeks. We have decided we both want to lose 10 lbs by then. If we are both succesful, we are going to reward ourselves; we just need to figure out what that reward is going to be. Any suggesions?
This weekend is going to be a good weekend. Didn't make it to the gym tonight, but I will make up for it Saturday and Sunday. The Badgers have a big game this weekend, so I'll get a pretty intense workout Sunday afternoon during the game! It's either that, or watch the game at home and tear pillows apart! Hey, it's a pretty important game...what can I say? That reminds me, the other night I was running on the treadmill and the girl on the treadmill next to me kept watching me! I'd catch her looking at me in the mirror and she'd quickly turn away. I have no idea what her deal was or why she was staring at me. Did I have a booger? Could you see my panty line (yeah, cause I'm really worried about that when I'm working out)? Did I smell funny? Was I making strange faces? Noises. Really, what was it? Then I started to think, "what if she is laughing at me and thinking, oh let's see how long this girl lasts running on the treadmill. She's too fat to be running." Little does she know I could probably kick her butt on the treadmill...and I did!!! You see, I've been a pretty avid gym-goer for several years now. I may not look like I can run, but, I can hold my own on the treadmill. Not that it's all that hard; it just takes time to build up your endurance. Anyway, after about 20 minutes, she finally decided enough was enough and I saw her go into the locker room (without even wiping her treadmill down!!!!) and two minutes later walk out and leave. Thank goodness, cause I was afraid I'd have to kung-fu her or something.
Tomorrow night I'm cooking dinner for a friend. Any suggestions as to healthy dinner ideas? I'd greatly appreciate it!
Well, today started out great! Was on plan 100% throughout the day, and even resisted the urge to have some of the yummy chocolate from Germany that I received from my boss. Darn, that was hard. I'm such a chocola-holic! Hell, give me sweets and I'm happy. Some days it is so hard for me to say no and sometimes I think I'm the only person in the world that has absolutely NO will-power.
After work I had to go out to dinner with some co-workers to celebrate my boss getting a promotion. So, we drank and we ate and we drank and we ate and we drank....for 3 hours! I finally had to leave to catch my train, but they were working on ordering dessert when I left. I guess I left at the right time.
Tomorrow will be another tough day as we are celebrating a co-workers retirement. Again, there will be more food than you can imagine. I wish I could just say "oh, I'll stick to the healthy food" but I know there is no way I can turn down the cake! The good news is a number of us are on Weight Watchers (our company is sponsoring the program), so I know there will be some healthy options there. The hard part is just chosing those options when the greasy, cheesy, sugary, starchy foods are screaming "eat me, eat me, eat me!"
Haven't worked out in two days. I hate it when I get in these slumps. I even took my gym clothes to work again today, but I ended up with too many things to do so I never made it. This weekend I need to make it to the gym and get a good run in at least 2 times! And on that note, I'm getting tired. Time for me to crawl into bed.
I'm no stranger to this whole weight loss thing. In fact, over the past 2.5 years, I've lost over 60 lbs. The trouble: keeping myself motivated enough to reach my goal. I seem to find myself in a slump every few months. So, here I am. Trying to find my motivation back once again.
Anyway, I figured what better way to hold me accountable then to journal about it where others can see and comment on it. And that brings me here...to Extrapounds.com. I'm very excited about this site and am hoping I find the support and encouragement that I need.
I have set a couple of goals for myself. Hopefully seeing them written down will keep me focused on them.
Re-introduce fruits and veggies back into my diet. They've been missing for some time now!
1. Lose 10 lbs by 4/5/07 - Easter weekend with Joe.
2. Run 5-mile Valley Forge run. April 2007
3. Run 10-mile Broad Street run. May 2007
4. Lose 25 lbs by my birthday. June 3, 2007
5. Lose 30 lbs by my friends wedding. June 29, 2007
All these goals are very attainable (with the exception of the 10-mile run!) for me as long as I keep my focus on what I'm trying to achieve. And, I think looking at the smaller goals will keep me more interested and less likely to get discouraged with the big numbers.
I'm very excited to be a part of the Extrapounds community and hope to meet a group of supporters!
