Bringin' on the Cabbage!
Today started with strawberry flavored instant oatmeal and a Dexatrim, which has made me feel rather jumpy and has not taken my apetite. I am presently boiling cabbage in chicken broth. Yum... (eye roll). I am going to attack it and eat it as if it is ambrosia being fed to me by Taylor Hicks.
We have had two formidable thunderstorms today, here in the furthest reaches of the universe. (Southeastern Kentucky). The rolling thunder has been matched only by the rumbling proclamations of hunger by my poor stomach. I am not used to eating healthy, three meals a day, that sort of blah business. But, I will prevail. I say, I WILL prevail!!
Last night, believe it or not, I was ASKED OUT by an attractive man. I know... I know... I was like, "Holy sh.. on a holy shingle!! Are you INSANE? Do you want to be crushed like the unfortunate dung beatle beneith the belly of the massive elephant?" I looked at him as if he were aflame, with great geysers of steam blowing out of every one of his orifices. But, I said yes. I gave him my phone number. He said I was "prettier than a doll." ????? :-O That sure contradicts the opinions I have formed about my poor self since the pounds crept on.
My ex boyfriend was visiting next door today, looking fabulous, lean and manly. I gazed out the window longingly, then felt rather foolish. I don't need him. I don't need oppression which will pack more pounds onto my already straining skeleton.
Well, it seems the heavens have spared us any more of their fury. The deluge has ceased and every dang thing in my yard is wet, including my child whom oughtta be famished too, but was fed tacos by a sympathetic neighbor. So, I supose I am off to pretend this blasted cabbage is really a big cheesy pizza with tomatoes, green peppers, and black olives. Keep me in your happy thoughts!!