"TheDayCameWhenTheRiskToRemain

tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took 2 blossom"

My Profile

  • Name: allibella
  • City: Hampton
  • Region: Georgia
  • Country: United States

My Weight Loss

Height: 165.1cm
Start weight: 296.00lb
Current weight: 296.00lb
Goal weight: 160.00lb
Lost to date: 0.00lb
Remaining: 136.00lb

My Calendar

9
February '12
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I'm Moving to Ohio!!!

Wow, I can't believe it! I'm actually moving to Ohio! I finally made the decision to move a few days ago. Why Ohio you ask? Because my BFF lives in Ohio. Of course I'm not moving just to be near my BFF. Here's the skinny:
 
I've lived in Georgia my whole life (that's almost 29 years as of April 12). I've always had a desire to move out of Georgia to try something new, have a new experience. Don't get me wrong...I love Georgia and it will always be my home. I will probably wind up back in Georgia eventually. But now I am at a place where I'm not tied down to anything. I'm not married, I don't have a boyfriend, and I will be done with school in August. I've prayed and thought long and hard about this decision. I've gone back and forth. I've let my fears rule my emotions and thoughts. But no more! Is it going to be scary moving from the only place I've ever known? HELL YEAH! But, I know this will be a good opportunity for me.
 
I write these thoughts here on extrapounds for the privacy. If I posted something on FB then EVERYONE would be sending me comments, and I'm just not ready for that yet. I want to tell the people I care about one-on-one and I've not been able to tell everyone yet. I don't want them to find out about such a major decision via FB. But as I'm sitting here working on a school project, I got this overwhelming urge to share the news. I'm excited and that let's me know this is a good thing, a very good thing.
 
How does this move relate to my weight loss journey? Well, my BFF is also on extrapounds. Her and I both struggle with weight and we try to motivate each other, but living so far away is difficult. So, when I move up to Ohio we'll be able to be each other's workout buddies, motivate each other, and take turns cooking and making wise decisions.
 
So, I'm excited about the possibilities. I'm a little scared about the job factor, but I know God's got this under control. Can't wait until September!!!

Seriously?

So in yesterday's post I was speaking about food as an addiction and how no one aspires to weigh 800 pounds, but it happens before you know it. Well, here is a woman who aspires to weigh 1,000 pounds! I'm not writing this to bash her or anything. I'm writing this because I am dumbfounded. Why in the world would you want to weigh that much? She already weighs 600 pounds and can barely get around. She has two small children. What about their futures? Does she not want to see them grow up? Whoah...I'm speechless.
 

What the heck am I supposed to do?

Food is my addiction. People understand addiction to cocaine, meth, and alcohol, so why can't they understand that food is addictive as well. It's my drug of choice. I think about it most of my day. I think about when I can get my next fix, but without making anyone suspicious. I might not even want fast food, but it's like this compulsion telling me to get it anyway, "You really do want me." And then I eat it and I feel sick, sick to my stomach. I feel this overwhelming urge to throw up, but I won't, I never do. It's just this feeling of complete and utter disgust with myself and the choices I make in regards to food. I have my life together in every other avenue of my life, so why does this consume me? How can I move past it? You can't abstain from food, you need it to survive, and that's why I think food is possibly the worst addiction to have. Most 12 step groups practice abstinence from the drug of choice. Well, what do you do when your drug of choice is also the very thing you need to survive and live?
 
I remember when I weighed 180 pounds. I told myself "I'll never allow myself to get to 200." Then I hit the 200 mark and I told myself "I'll never allow myself to get to 300." And here I am, FOUR pounds away from 300!!! And it only gets worse...no one ever says "Hey, I want to be one of those 800 pound people on the news that needs an ambulance to escort me to doctor's visits." That's not ANYONE's lifelong goal and dream that they want to aspire to. So it got me thinking...if I continue on this path, food WILL kill me and I WILL be one of those people who cannot walk or leave the house. I don't want that! I enjoy life too much. I have too many interests!
 
I'm tired of not being able to lift my leg up to put my underwear or socks on. I'm tired of having a hard time getting on the floor with the kids I work with because of this damn belly. I'm sick and I'm tired of being sick and tired all of the time.
 
This is a quote that resonates with me: "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." ~Anais Nin
 
I'm tired of being tight in a bud, a slave to my weight and food addiction. I'm ready to bloom and become the beautiful flower that I know I am on the inside. I'm just ready to show the world now...

Whatcha Gonna Do

Well I worked out again yesterday. I did 25 minutes on the treadmill. I'm trying to have a goal of 20-25 minutes of working out. Since I have gone from no kind of activity, I don't want to get bogged down by trying to do a lengthy workout. I want to ease into it. I want to make 20 minutes a habit, then move on, take this exercising thing on gradually. Maybe I won't despise it as much and will start to enjoy it. I mean when you run marathons you don't go from zero to a 2K overnight do you? Well, I'm using this logic with my workouts too.

I also want to try to get up just 20-30 minutes earlier in the morning so I can accomplish my workouts first thing in the morning. That way I don't feel so overwhelmed by the time I get home from work to accomplish this because it would have already been done. If I have time and feel like it I could do more in the evening, but the important thing is to just get some sort of movement started. This will be hard. I'm not a morning person, but I must do something. I'll be starting school tomorrow and will be even more pressed for time, so the morning is really my only option.

I picked up my bridesmaid dress from getting altered Saturday. It was depressing when trying to zip the dress. I haven't gained weight since the fitting, but the idiots at the shop didn't order a size bigger like they are supposed to. And the way the dress is made and fit and the way my body shape is, it's a snug fit in the back section. I was blessed with a booty, what can I say! So I'm trying to do crunches and hopefully I can lose about 5-10 pounds in a couple of weeks. I might want to start watching what I eat though. That's the hardest part I think. I have to trick my mind into not feeling like I'm depriving myself. This is the key...

Well, that's all for now. I hope everyone had a fantabulous weekend! Now back to the daily grind!!!

A Little Sumthin' Sumthin'

Yesterday I was tired, I didn't want to do anything, but I knew I had to do a little something, so I walked on the treadmill for 20 minutes. Then I did a little bit of weight lifting with 5 pound weights to work on my triceps. I also did some crunches and sit ups. I'm trying to lose a few pounds in the midsection before May 19th because I am a bridesmaid in a wedding and the way the dress fits, it's a little snug in the midsection. I can't keep saying, "oh I'll workout tomorrow," because then I just put off tomorrow until the next tomorrow and so on.

I've heard it takes anywhere from a month to six weeks to form a habit. So a few months ago I had the intention of making exercise a habit and priority in my life. I did really well for two to three weeks, but then I just kind of fizzled out as usual. But I'm willing to attempt this again. It is going to be hard since I work full-time and am about to start graduate school, but I know I have to make the time, that this has to become a part of my life. I'm tired of weighing 260 pounds. I'm tired of having knee troubles. I'm tired of being out of breath with the slightest excursion. I'm tired of being limited because of my weight and size. I'm tired of having PCOS, metabolic problems, period problems, blood pressure problems, cholesterol problems, and health problems. I'm just tired of being this way. I want to be healthy, happy, feel good and feel comfortable with myself. I MUST achieve this. It will be a long process, but my life depends on it.

Well this is sad...

I haven't updated in almost a year, which you know what that means, I haven't really done anything in that long either. But I want to get back on my quest for good health and weight loss. I'm not sure what I'll do. I don't have the resources to join a gym or a weight loss program, so I'll just have to do things on my own. I do know that when I get insurance again I am going to seek medical assistance with a nutritionist and in the endocrinology field as well. I think this will help immensely! Also, I want to see a lady that does work call Irradology. My mom knows two people that have used her and have found amazing results, not only in weight loss, but cancer remission as well!

I'm having a hard time making time for exercise. I commute into Atlanta for work everyday. I'm gone from 6:20am to 6pm. Once I get home I'm exhausted and have to prepare for the next day. Then next week I'll be starting grad. school. I'll have classes from 6-9pm two nights a week. I know working out on these days just won't be an option, unless I utilize the morning hours or my lunch break. All I know is that I have to figure something out. I will not lose weight and get in better shape if I do not work out. Plus, once I get more used to working out, I always feel better. I need to for the energy as well. Once I start school I'm going to need all the energy I can get!

Good luck to my buddy Sarah who started WW this week! You'll do great girl! LUMI!

I lost 7 inches and 9 pounds!

I started working out mid March at Curves. I didn't have great results last month, but I contribute that to gaining more muscle and losing the fat. But as of this month I have lost 7 inches, 9 pounds, and 1.50% body fat!!! I'm really excited and they were so excited for me at the gym! I might not be able to always eat right, but I am really starting to enjoy this working out thing.

I didn't get to work out for two weeks because I was really sick, but I still managed to lose weight. My goal: I would like to lose 50 pounds by the time Sandie and me go on our cruise in November/December.

Sorry for the delay

Yeah, so I realized I hadn't updated in a while and honestly it's because I have nothing good to report. I've actually been gaining weight. Blah! But I joined Curves and I'm trying to go at least 3 days a week if not 4 or 5 if I can fit it in. The gym I'm at isn't opened on the weekends, so the only time I can go is Monday-Friday. I put my clothes in my car and go right after work. I've really noticed that when I work out, it alleviates my stress. I always heard that, but had never experienced it myself. But now I have! I think I'm going to ask them today about their Weight Maintenance Plan. It's just been hard to eat healthy b/c I'm super broke right now and we all know that healthy isn't cheap, which really sucks. Everyone in this world complains about how there are so many overweight people, but no one tries to help in anyway. There need to be fast food restaurants that are strictly healthy foods. Where's the $1 menu for healthy foods huh? It's an outrage! Who knows, maybe I'll open up the first healthy fast food place. I think if I started in the right market it could be a real success. Too bad I don't have the money to start it up, but one day I will. Ok, well that's all I've got for now. I'll try to update more frequently now.

7 Ways to Boost Your Metabolism

Here's an article I saw on ediets and I thought it might be helpful for everyone!

By Sheri Strykowski
Special for eDiets

Ready to transform your sweet self into a lean, not-so-mean, fat-burning machine? You may be surprised to find that you don't have to overhaul your lifestyle.

People make the mistake of thinking they have to make drastic changes to lose weight and get in shape, says Lyssie Lakatos, RD, LD, CDN, but the secret is to make small changes and incorporate them into their lives permanently.

"Dropping your caloric intake below 1,000 calories a day on a consistent basis will signal your body that you are in starvation mode, and will slow down your metabolism," warns Lakatos, who with her twin sister, Tammy Lakatos Shames, RD, LD, CDN, is co-author of Fire Up Your Metabolism. When the metabolism slows, we store food as fat and gain weight.

Calories do count, but it’s also about how efficiently your body burns those calories. Your metabolism plays a big part in regulating your weight, Shames says. Metabolism is the way your body uses up calories from the food you eat and turns them into energy. Metabolic rate is the speed at which you use up those calories. The goal is to get your metabolism into peak operating condition so you will burn the most calories all day long -- even while you sleep.

If you follow these seven tips to speed up your metabolism, you might never again find yourself facing the dreaded "next bigger size" on the rack of cute jeans at your favorite store.

Tip 1 -- Determine your daily caloric needs: To rev up your fat-burning engine, don't overload your system with too much food, Shames says. Figure out how many calories you need to consume each day to lose weight and keep your metabolism humming. Caloric level is determined by taking into account your age, sex, height, weight, lean body mass and activity level. Here’s a quick formula from Shames to give you an idea of your magic number: Multiply your body weight by 11. For example, a 140-pound woman would need to consume 1,540 calories per day to lose weight. If you’re very active, you can multiply your weight by 12.

Tip 2 -- Divvy up your meals: Kick-start your metabolism and curb your appetite by dividing your meals into five to six small, nutritious meals a day instead of three squares. Eat a 200-400 calorie mini-meal every three to four hours. Your body will expend more energy to digest the food and your metabolic rate will increase, Lakatos says.

Tip 3 -- Just move! Physical activity accounts for 20 percent to 40 percent of calories burned each day. The American Academy of Family Physicians suggests a good goal for many people is to work up to exercising four to six times a week for 30 to 60 minutes at a time. If you can’t do that much, do what you can, say the twins: Walk the dog, park the car at the far end of the lot, take the stairs instead of the elevator, clean the house, just do something.

Tip 4 -- Pump iron: Muscle is your best friend! Your resting metabolic rate (RMR) is the pace at which your body burns calories at rest. It accounts for 60 to 70 percent of your daily calorie expenditure, and it’s closely linked to the amount of muscle you have. Muscle burns more calories than fat, and the more muscle you have, the more calories your body will burn, even while you sleep. Lean muscle needs calories just to exist, so start lifting those weights.

Tip 5 -- Sleep tight: Sleep loss may increase hunger and affect the body’s metabolism, which may make it more difficult to lose weight, according to studies published in the Journal of the American Medical Association and the Lancet. People who lose sleep may continue to feel hungry despite adequate food intake because sleep loss has been shown to affect the secretion of cortisol, a hormone that regulates appetite. Make sure you get in your eight hours or more of shut-eye every night.

Tip 6 -- Eat lean protein and good carbs: Your body burns some of its own calories when it digests the food you eat. This is called the thermic effect of foods (TEF), and it’s what makes protein (which has the highest thermic effect of any food) and good carbs metabolism-friendly. Lean protein such as turkey and chicken also builds calorie-burning muscle. Good carbs such as whole grains, legumes, veggies and fruit are also your body’s major fuel source, Shames says. They provide the energy to get you moving so you can burn more calories.

Tip 7 -- Drink H2O: Researchers in Germany have found that drinking water may increase the rate at which people burn calories. Study participants’ metabolic rates increased by 30 percent after consuming approximately 17 ounces of water. The energy-burning process of metabolism needs water to work effectively. Water also fills you up, curbs your appetite, flushes out your system and rids the body of bloat. Drink at least eight to 10 glasses per day and more if you’re active.

Sheri Strykowski is a freelance journalist who specializes in health, fitness and lifestyle. Her articles have appeared in The Chicago Tribune, Lerner newspapers and National Safety Council publications. She is also a content expert who has built more than 40 websites for a Fortune 100 company.


Not the progress I would have hoped for...

So I'm really not getting into this whole weight loss thing like I had hoped for. I don't know what my problem is. At certain times of the day I feel so motivated, but then at other times I feel like just doing what's easy. I get lazy, that's my problem. It's easier to go out to eat or pick something up then to take the time and prepare a good, healthy meal. I'm working on it though, I really am.

My mom bought me a Weight Watchers cookbook that has weekly meal plans and recipes. I need structure, so I think having a plan with different ideas to go on will really help me. I'm planning on driving home this weekend and picking the book up, of course I'll have with the family too. Hehe. Well, that's all I've got for now. Hopefully my next post I'll have better progress to report.