Pissed

I learned an important lesson today about doing runs.  It doesn't matter HOW freaking long the line to the porta potty is, GO before the race.   I was wearing a leak pad and it just wasn't enough.  I realized after a mile that I'd been steadily leaking and reached down...at the ripe old age of 51, I had wet my freaking pants.

NOT a happy camper.  Took off my long sleeve shirt, tied it around my waste and walked on in.   So much for seeing how much time I could take off.    Next time, pee RIGHT before I go, bigger leak pad, and don't take the dog.  (He wasn't great at the start with all the people and other dogs.)

Coming Clean

I think my new trainer is great....I also think his food advice has me spinning a bit and that I need to back off that portion with him and just do the workouts/exercises.  I am feeling rebellious, tired, and complacent about all of it at the moment.   I only see him two more times, tomorrow and next Friday...then I'm on my own.   I will be ready to run the 1/2 marathon in September thanks to him, and I actually expect to have a decent finish time, thanks to him.  

What I need to do with food is get back to basics, back to the things that got me this far.   So...to that end I will get my Beck Diet Solution out and make a NEW list...A list of why I want to stay at my goal weight.  I will begin to read that twice a day every day.  Then I'm going back to all the self talk things and re-working them.   I think my thought processes are different than they were when I began, and the sabotaging thoughts may not be the same as the ones I was having before, therefore I need new responses.  If not, revisiting the old ones will not be a bad thing.

Lastly, I'm looking at this as a fresh start.   I am probably 6 or 7 pounds from my Dr. set goal, and today is day one.  I will not wipe out my graph, because honestly, that represents alot of hard work and I'm not going to say it never happened.   But from today, it's a new game.  I have 6 or 7 pounds to lose, and I am going to lose them and learn to live here. 

Thanks for listening

Home again

I am soooo tired.  We walked and walked and walked.  And then we walked some more.  A few times we took the light rail, but mostly, our feet were our transportation.   And I ran.  :)

No alcohol today.  Lots and lots of water.   Food is OK today, I need to do my push ups and stuff.  Didn't do them at all this weekend...don't tell Dan.

Going to put some jeans in the wash, and relax before bed.

Portland

I got my computer up and running yesterday and read a few blogs, but didn't take lots of time to respond.    I started the day yesterday with running along the Willamette River.  It's about 6 blocks from the hotel so there was a nice warm up/cool down.    Ran the whole riverfront park and retraced my steps for some of it.  There's a foot bridge that crosses the river so I got the view from both sides.  Saw some sort of water fowl eat a fish.   The fish was about 1/3 as big as the bird, and still alive when the bird tipped it's head back and slid it down the throat.   Which left me wondering what it's like having a large live fish in your belly while you float on the river.   Don't think I'll find out...EVER.

We have been to a new brew pub and sampled their selections of beers...some were quite forgetable, but all were good, and one was amazing.   We went to dinner at the pasta place we went to on my birthday for the butternut squash ravioli again.  It should be a crime for food to be that good...o my it was good.  This time I couldn't finish all of my ravioli.

We also participated in a "haunted Portland" tour at 10 last nite.  Didn't see any ghosts, but were royally entertained for a few hours.    We got to carry those little EMF detectors like in Ghost Hunters.   It was great fun.  I now have a ton of pictures of nothing that we took in hopes of getting ghosts. 

Today is the Saturday Market, then the Widmer brewery with my old boss's daughter who's in college here.   I think tonite we'll meet up with a buddy of Jack's who's in town for a football coaches training thing.   Tomorrow, down to the train station and back home.   It's been a fabulous time.   I am not sure if I will run again this afternoon or save it for tomorrow.   I hope I don't totally blow the scale out of the water when I get home?   I have to find some fruits and veggies today somewhere!

random stuff

I ran before WW today....3.4 miles in 44 minutes.    I'm getting quicker, but it's not really harder.   Trainer has me doing 45 minutes 3 days a week and an hour on the weekend...then I'll go to an hour 3 days a week and an hour and 15 minutes on the weekend.  Eventually I'll be running as long as it takes to do 1/2 marathon...and from there I'll work on actually getting that many miles in.   I think I'm gonna do this!

Loss of 1.6 at WW today.  I will take it.   We are in the process of REALLY needing to defrost our freezer so I've been trying to eat what is in there.  Turns out what's in there are some WW frozen dinners that must have been on sale...Hate them.  Also Halibut and Salmon that hubby caught in Alaska last summer.  Hard to get excited about cooking that for a house full of fish haters.

Tomorrow I work a half a day, go to a training w/ some of my staff, then head home, get packed and get down to the train.  DH and I are going to Portland for a long weekend of debauchery and brewery tours and....doing enough exercise to get away w/ a bunch of beer.   Can't wait!

Trainer tips. (You're going to love this one) Best reason ever to run more slowly

You know I've been on this slow run kick, right?  Well, turns out in addition to getting your legs conditioned to do the long haul, running slowly also burns body fat, rather than glycogen from your muscles.   Starting out fast...Your body burns the fuel that is the most efficient...the glycogen...and he said, once it starts on glycogen, it doesn't switch back to fat....But once it starts on fat, it will continue to burn fat, even when it goes to the glycogen toward the end of a long run when you actually DO need the speed.

So, turns out that turtle was right!!!

Trainer the Hun today

Race outlook

I am now registered for:

5k on March 13th

10k in April...forget the date

1/2 Marathon Labor Day weekend.

My son is registered for the 5k and 10k  and I'm doing the 1/2 with three other weight loss buddies, one from WA, one from OR, and one from IN (I think it's Indiana).

After I pissed the trainer off the other day, we got into a discussion about medals for finishers of 1/2 marathons.   Those also piss him off.   He is passionate about competitive running and believes that medals are for winners.  Period.   I believe the medals represent different things to different people.   For me, finishing is deserving of celebration...but I don't care if it's a medal, a t-shirt, the main thing is knowing I did it and it didn't kill me.

That being said...I ran (very slowly) today for 45 minutes....at the end my legs were tired, but I wasn't winded.  I get it...If you run and get winded you can slow down and catch your breath.  If you run and your legs give up, you're done.

Patience

But first, a brief trip to the mundane where I tell you about recent stuff.   I pissed the trainer off on Friday by having had a misunderstanding as to what my homework was and consequently not doing half of it.  Lesson learned.  Not a good idea to piss off a 24 year old ex marine going through a divorce.  No sense of humor there.  None.   I hated him for the first time on Friday.

Yesterday was a Zumba carnival that I almost NEVER found....but awesome once I got there....and then a 45 minute run w/ the dog who couldn't understand why I wouldn't pause ever so often so he could pee on stuff.   Then I dutifully did my assignment (push ups, planks, dips, squats, and lunges- ALL of them)  My upper arms and shoulders are no longer speaking to the rest of my body.

Now, Patience.  There is an article in this month's Self Magazine by Valerie Frankel  I think I will bullet point it....it was REALLY thought provoking for me so I thought it might be worth sharing.

• Impatient people are prone to obesity
• Possibly because they prefer to eat their cake now rather than sacrifice a slice for future weight loss
• impatient types were shown to have a higher risk for hypertension
  
• Pardoxically impatient types may also be procrastinoators....follow through , evidently, is not impatient people's forte.  Unless it takes two seconds, that is.
• Impatience is not a personality trait; it's a behavior which means you can alter it.
• Start by asking why waiting makes you uncomfortable
• Typically impatient people feel that they are special and should be free of the annoying inconveniences of life.  They are narcissists and often think, subconsciously, that their time is more valuable.
• Impatience can also be a by-product of living in a chaotic world.  It arises when we don't feel in control.
• Waiting with patience means actively accepting the current circumstances and giving up the illusion that you can control the world.
• Patience takes practice...Patience IS practice.
• to cultivate it remind yourself constantly that every moment is the only place that your life is occuring.  Train yourself to live completely in the present, in peace, even if you're sitting in a traffic jam (REALLY?   UGGGHH)
• When you're waiting in line read a paperback stashed in your purse. Meditate, pray, or repeat silent affirmations.  As you breath in and out say a silent mantra of your own.
• Instead of thinking "This line should move faster"..."It would be nice if this line were moving faster"  Changing your language can minimize disappointment.

Holy Crap!