I've skimmed some titles of blogs...no way to catch up since the last time I was here. I'm seeing lots of old friends posting about being back, slipping, struggling. I also see some losing and working out! Kudos to you.
I've gotten into a downward spiral, and rather than come here and reach out I tell myself that I'd be a downer, I'd be a discouragement. I feel guilty, and convinced that I can turn it around by myself and come back w/o so much damage done.
Who am I kidding? I've once again turned to food to sooth deep deep hurts and fears and deal with uncertainty. My positive attitude has evaporated and I'm mired in worry and pessimism. I start out every day with fabulous intentions and then get glued to my desk chair at work and then come home and escape into stupid internet games.
I haven't been to the gym in ages, though I'm still paying. I give in to cravings, and tell myself tomorrow will be better. All the while, lying to myself, saying I can pick it back up and do better. I need to face some reality before being a size 14 leads to being a size 16 and that leads back to shopping in the plus size section.
I remember how proud I felt a year ago, buying clothes in size 10. How much fun I had making new discoveries. How proud I was to get that tattoo of committment. I desparately need to get back to that. And, I need all of you in my corner. I'm not totally flushed down the toilet yet....but if I don't turn this around I will be. Who's with me? And more importantly, how can I help anyone else in this same stupid boat?
Posted By: Franma
Comments to this post:
10/12/2010 08:54
count me in
I'm in that boat too! Done okayISH this week though. Remember how GOOD you feel when you eat healthily and are active. It's blumming hard work though.... and don't think I'm out the woods yet....
We all fall off the bandwagon and have trouble getting back on...and sometimes it's worse than others. However, seeing somebody like you, who has lost a great deal of weight (the same amount I'm hoping to lose in the end!), having the same struggles as I am is oddly inspirational. You've been where I am now and you prevailed. We're in this thing for support and sometimes we think we can't give it due to our personal struggles....but you never know what you may say that just might help out somebody else unwittingly. With that said, I'd like to thank you for posting this particular entry -- it did me a world of good knowing I'm not alone in the fight to become healthy and through all the ups and downs, there's hope to prevail over my weight.
WOO HOO Fran!! Rally the troops & off you girls go!! I'll be shouting support from the side lines when I get chance!! And when I can't..... remember how much I want you in my maintenance section on EP!! xx
I hear you ! i have been finding it hard for the past couple of months and have put on a couple of kgs which i just can't seem to lose. i know what to do but i just can't seem to stick to it - i am maintaining at my plus 2kg weight but not losing. it has been really quiet on here lately and the motivation i used to get from here has gone - i understand that people are busy though.
i am only a quarter of the way through and really need to get going again.
I knew.... but only some... didn't know you werent at gym, take it no running either? sign up for a race... turkey trot or whatever its called once your signed up itll push you to to train for it! xxx
i'm having struggles as well. i find my choices aren't as good as they should be. i'm allowing myself crap. i NEED to choose better. we have two choices at EVERY meal/snack. choose wisely or not.
try to choose wisely more often then not.
I hear you. i feel you. unfortunately, i don't have the magic answer, as i too, am struggling, daily. did i mention i started smoking again last week? yea... wth is wrong with me?
if you'd like a long distance phone buddy to text/call. let me know, i'll send you my number. :)
