12/31/2009 14:50
end of 2009
2009 is coming to a close. As I type this, there are less than 17 hours left of 2009. Every year I resolve to loose some FAT. Well, here I am wanting to shedd all this blubber. I am hoping that this time next year, I won't be dreaming of being skinny but I WILL be skinny.
I learned alot last year. Using Martha Beck's book 4-Day Win and having a super friend, Michelle, I was able to learn a bunch about my eating habits and what I needed to do to re-learn how I eat, as well as when I eat. That book taught me a bunch. But I don't know these last few months, has been difficult and I kinda "forgot" everything that I learned. The weight, the attitude, the behavior has reverted back to where I was last year I'm afraid to admit.
So much in my life I suppose I could place a blame on...WOW, thinking about it a BUNCH of stuff happened that I could point the finger at. But, you know what? I choose to NOT blame a thing. I overate, I became lazy, I forgot about all the stuff I learned in the 4-day win -- I did it PERIOD. Yes, I had a bunch of hurdles, quite a bit of stress and even tragedies, but I refuse to BLAME my "backsliding" on any of it. Because I have a choice. Everyone is faced with daily tragedies, daily crosses, daily stress, I'm not alone, I'm not the only one that has to deal with "stuff". I dealt with my "stuff" in a very negative way -- I overate and got lazy.
What do I do now? Well, what I do is:
Number 1 Admit
Number 2 Accept
Number 3 Forget
Number 4 Start Over
Number 5 Do It
And that is a good thing about New Years and old years as far as that goes. For today I will:
Number 1 Admit -- I admit that I am where I was this time last year. FAT. I worked hard on the 4-day win with my friend Michelle and I admit that things in my life caused me to over eat, not just over eat, but BINGE and What I did to myself (binging) caused me to become lazy on top of it all and I gained any weight lost, back.
Number 2 Accept -- OK. I accept what I did. I own up to what I did. I will not place the blame on anything or anyone. I accept my behavior.
Number 3 Forgive -- The Lord instructs us to forgive one another and I believe that even means ourselves. After all we are suppose to love our neighbor as ourselves. So...I forgive myself. I am sorry, and I forgive ME. I did it, I admit it, I'm sorry and I forgive and now that forgiveness has been given to me, I forget it, wipe the slate clean, move on.
Number 4 Start Over -- Beginning NOW, not tomorrow. But NOW, I start over. The slate is now clean and I'm ready to move on. I will, as soon as I get off the computer, get moving. Starting over means, forget about the past. I know what I want, I know what I need to do, I know what I long for -- this leads to the final...
Number 5 DO IT -- In order to start over I must just simply DO IT. Get off the computer and DO IT. Do what you may ask? Well, What I mean by Do it, I mean... Keep busy. Don't get lazy. Eat less, move more. Whatever it takes, make lists, set goals, call Michelle, just DO IT.
I will be making a new post at least once a week.
Good luck to all of you in the New Year.